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Should bridesmaids pay for their own dresses? Bride asks friends to spend £144 each on theirs

Would you wear a dress you hated? [Photo: Blake Newman via Pexels]
Would you wear a dress you hated? [Photo: Blake Newman via Pexels]

As anyone who has ever watched ‘Don’t Tell the Bride’ will appreciate, bridesmaids’ dresses can be a controversial subject.

Most brides will want their bridesmaids to look lovely without stealing the limelight.

But one soon-to-be-wed has baffled the Internet by suggesting her bridal party don dresses described as ‘monstrosities’.

What’s more, they are going to have to fork out nearly £150 themselves for the privilege of wearing them.

Taking to parenting site Mumsnet one of the disgruntled bridesmaids explained about the situation and asked the forum whether it would be unreasonable to tell the bride that her bridesmaids don’t want to pay for the dresses.

“A close friend of mine has got engaged and has asked me to be bridesmaid. I, of course, said yes and have been happily helping her plan,” she started her post.

After explaining that her friend had been exhibiting some bridezilla moments, she went on to say that it is really the bridesmaids dresses that is causing the issue.

Though the bride had already explained the bridesmaids would have to pay for their own dresses, and poster is a “firm believer of wearing whatever the bride wants you to,” the dress is so ugly they really don’t want to wear it.

“There are 6 of us and we all absolutely hate the dress she has picked. She has found it online with her DM and it is honestly the fuglest dress I have ever seen,” she said.

Having decided to tell her how they feel about the dresses, the original poster revealed that she has been tasked with telling the bride.

“So AIBU [Am I Being Unreasonable] to tell her that we do not want to wear and pay for these monstrosities? How do I do that without upsetting her? She’s so stressed and I don’t want to add to that,” she asked.

She also shared a link to the dress and said the colour the bride has picked is yellow “Not a flattering colour on any of us.”

Would you wear this? [Photo:kissydress.co.uk]
Would you wear this? [Photo:kissydress.co.uk]

Of course, the Internet had something to say about the bride’s behaviour and choice of bridesmaids’ dresses.

Many were of the opinion that it was unreasonable to expect the bridesmaids to wear the dresses.

“I think that it is super cheaky to say to someone: ‘look, I’m so important that I get to decide what you wear and you have to pay for it as well just because it’s my wedding,’” one user wrote.

“I don’t know how you go about that conversation but they are seriously hideous! You can’t wear that!” another added.

Others offered some more practical advice about talking to the bride.

“First, say you and the other bridesmaids are worried about these dresses and you’ve been nominated to talk to her so she doesn’t have all of you calling,” one user offered.

“Tell her that on the wedding day, you and the other bridesmaids will be making sure everything runs smoothly, helping organise guests during the photos and handing out favours etc. With dresses that size, it’s going to make your tasks difficult,” she continued.

“Then say that you’d really like if she could choose some dresses you could all go somewhere to try on in the UK before buying so you can avoid all those problems.”

A bride has caused controversy by asking her bridesmaids to wear and pay for monstrosities [Photo: Blake Newman via Pexels]
A bride has caused controversy by asking her bridesmaids to wear and pay for monstrosities [Photo: Blake Newman via Pexels]

But other users thought that the choice of bridesmaids dress was down to the bride and her friends should just wear them.

“I also think it’s really rude people suggesting that the bridesmaids should get together and offer alternative dresses,” one user wrote.

“It’s the wedding of the bride and groom. If you want to be a bridesmaid, you wear what they want you to wear. You can decide the bridesmaids dresses at your own wedding FGS.”

A further group of respondents suggested the bride could actually be playing a joke on the bridesmaids.

“She’s winding you up,” one user wrote. “Go along with it……. and say you’re all so excited and what lovely taste she has got!”

It isn’t the first time a bride’s demands has made headlines of late. Back in August a furious bride-to-be called off the wedding she wanted her friends to pay £1,200 to attend.

And last month the Internet had something to say about a bride’s outrageous list of wedding demands.

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