"I Dated A Coworker, And It Ruined My Career": 11 People Who Have Dated A Coworker/Boss Are Sharing Their Experiences

When you spend so much time at work and around the same people, it feels like human nature that you could possibly find yourself interested in or even enamored with one of your coworkers.

So, I asked the BuzzFeed Community, "If you've ever dated your coworker or boss, how did it go?" And the stories ranged from people getting their fairytale endings to ruined careers. Here's what they had to say:

1."I was 16 and had my first job. The guy I was working with was cute, and we hit it off and dated for about a year, but we were young, and it inevitably didn’t work out. But we stayed friends on social media and stuff. Fast forward nine years, and I run into him in a local grocery store. We start messaging and chatting, and by the end of the week, we go on a date. It’s been 10 years, and we have been married for seven. He is the love of my life."

2."I dated a coworker for two years; we were friends for at least four years before that. We seemed to be absolute soulmates. We loved all of the same things, had similar sex drives, and had similar political leanings. We were married for over 10 years. The marriage ended when he cheated and gave me an STD. I was willing to consider marital counseling, but HE filed for divorce right when I confronted him with his cheating."

"I had just gotten out of the hospital after a tumultuous 16 months, which ended with the deaths of three close family members, a lifelong friend, two beloved pets, and my father’s heart attack. I was fired because I couldn’t stop talking about my divorce at work. It may seem fair, except he was retained, even though he engaged in the same conduct AND his mistress was a subordinate. I would never, ever date anyone in the workplace."

—fayeesnow

3."My boss and I started dating after working together for two years. We occasionally flirted, careful not to cross any boundaries, as neither of us was sure how the other would react. Three years later, we’re still going strong! I left that job because it turned out another manager had a thing for him. She was furious when we became public, and she treated me like garbage every day until I finally quit. Bonus: I got the man and a better job where I make more than her!"

4."I dated a co-worker once. At the time, it was amazing; we could see each other every day, and making plans was so easy. But when the relationship ended and we still had to see each other all the time with fake politeness, it was so awkward. Plus, it took me like two years of unnecessary time to get over him, because I was constantly reminded."

—anra

5."I met my partner at work. We have been together for almost five years now and don’t work together anymore. I actually miss it in a way, but people did use to try and cause drama between us when they found out about us, so I definitely don’t miss that about it."

6."I met my husband at work, completely unexpectedly. We were both seeing other people, and in general, we had few interactions initially. But it was a small office, and as we started to get to know each other, sparks started flying. We kept our relationship a secret for a while until we were caught out at a bar by a friend of another colleague."

"We worked together for a year before I changed jobs, and I missed being able to see him throughout the day. 10 years later, we're married and work from home full-time post-COVID. I'm thankful we learned how to share and balance work and home life and could avoid the learning curve of suddenly being with each other 24/7."

—anewfan2018

7."I dated a coworker, and it ruined my career. It started innocently enough. We became friendly, then friends, and then he got flirty, which I didn't approve of (I was a manager, although not his manager; I took my job seriously). Eventually, his charms wore down my already brittle boundaries, and we became an item. We waited a few weeks to let the company know, and though they were happy for us at first, they (understandably) got sick of our shit real fast."

8."We HATED each other instantly, so we naturally got drunk at a work night out (for the young staff, not an official work night) and had what was meant to be a fling. We spent nearly two years together, long after we both left the company. Honestly, it was pretty much a true love-hate relationship until we had a baby, and then he just hated us both and became a monster. I never had another workplace romance after that one."

—kellyd905

9."A few years ago, I (female) slept with my female boss. She was very deep in the closet, and for a few years after, she just pretended it didn't happen, and if the topic came up, she would say that she didn't like girls, despite me being the second one she slept with (and I would see her on Tinder, but she said her friends made the account)."

10."I dated my coworker for two years without anyone else at work knowing. It was a small company, and we worked closely together, leaving plenty of room for sneaky flirting. It was so fun. Flash forward 12 years later, and though we don't work together anymore, we share a beautiful home and still have a great relationship!"

—Anonymous

And finally, this person shared how sometimes you have to go through being "bad" to find the good:

11."I began sleeping with my boss that I’d been working with at a restaurant, and it was a casual thing. I had told myself I didn’t want anything serious after my previous breakup, so I didn’t have an issue engaging in a casual fling. Everything was great for a while. Some people at work knew, some didn’t, but he was an intimidating enough GM that no one was going to make an issue. COVID hit, and by this time we’d already made plans to move in together in a nearby bigger city, and he had decided to take a different job."

Note: Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity. 

Have you ever been involved in a workplace romance? Let me know your experience in the comments.