How we met: ‘She took me to my first nightclub. I thought it was the coolest thing ever’

As a college freshman in the autumn of 2015, Kathlina was excited about what lay ahead. “I was studying political science and Spanish in Jacksonville, Florida, and I was having a great time meeting people,” she says. She soon struck up a friendship with a man in one of her classes and began joining him and his friends at campus events. “I was dating my childhood sweetheart from home, so I definitely wasn’t looking for a relationship, but I was keen to meet new people,” she says.

One day, she was invited to her new friend’s apartment, where she met his girlfriend, Adriana. “She was in her third year studying psychology and I thought she was a bit intimidating because she was a senior,” says Kathlina. Adriana admits she was “frosty” at first. “Kathlina was so pretty and smart; I felt a bit threatened,” she says. “I wasn’t a very secure person at the time.”

Kathlina and Adriana crossed paths at a few more college events, but Adriana says she continued to give Kathlina the cold shoulder. “Eventually I started feeling guilty, so I asked my boyfriend for her number so I could apologise,” she says. They went out for bubble tea together and “really hit it off”. “She was so nice and I realised I’d misjudged her,” says Adriana. “Based on my behaviour, I would have understood if she didn’t want to hang out, but I could really see myself being friends with her if she was open to it.”

Kathlina was “super-excited” to be getting to know Adriana better: “Our conversation just flowed. We talked for hours about everything from food to politics to Beyoncé.” From then on, they began attending campus events together more regularly and meeting up for lunch when they could. “She took me to my first nightclub,” says Kathlina. “I thought it was the coolest thing ever.”

Callout

At the end of the academic year, Adriana broke up with her boyfriend and Kathlina supported her. “She was there through the thick of it. Whenever I needed to talk, she made time to speak to me and I knew she always had my back,” says Adriana.

After graduating, Adriana stayed in Jacksonville to work as a resident assistant at a women’s shelter for two years, before moving to Gainesville to complete a master’s in environmental and public health. They remained close friends and spoke on the phone all the time.

In 2020, Kathlina moved to Austin, Texas, to study environmental global policy. A year later, Adriana decided to move there, too: “I really wanted a change and had always enjoyed my trips to Austin. Plus, my best friend was there.” Kathlina says it was “phenomenal” to be living in the same city as her friend again: “It was like a missing piece falling into place. I love living here, but it’s been so much more fun having her to do things with.” As well as regular baking nights, thrift shopping trips, movies and eating out, they have also explored different parts of Texas together.

Next year, it will be the pair’s 10-year “friendship anniversary”. They are planning a hiking trip to Connecticut and Vermont to celebrate. “We decided to do something special,” says Kathlina. “We both love autumn and we want to see the leaves change colour, as it’s not something you really get to experience in Texas.”

Both women say they have been a support to each other. “My first year of grad school was remote, due to the pandemic, which was especially tough, but she helped me through,” Kathlina says. Adriana also helped her to plan her wedding to her childhood sweetheart, which was initially called off due to Covid. “She helped me plan it twice. She was there through all of it.”

Kathlina has been Adriana’s “confidante” in relationships. “When I met my partner, she was the first person I told that I liked him,” she says. “I know she’ll always be honest with me.” She loves her friend’s strength and the fact that she is always unapologetically herself. “It’s the longest friendship I’ve had in my life and having a constant like that is so special. I think of her as another sister.”

Adriana appreciates Kathlina’s resilience and confidence. “She’ll always put herself out there. If I find some spur-of-the-moment activity like bouldering, a drag pageant or a protest, she’s always the first onboard,” she says. “I love knowing that she’s always going to be there for me.”