How alcohol can impact your relationships with others and yourself
Following their shock split in August last year, boxer Tommy Fury has opened up about what caused the breakdown in his relationship with Molly-Mae.
Speaking to Men’s Health, he revealed that he "got addicted to alcohol and I couldn’t be the partner that I wanted to be anymore."
As well as dispelling rumours of him cheating, which circulated on social media and in the press at the time, Fury said that he his “mental health was in the pain” after undergoing reconstructive surgery after snapping ligaments in his hand in 2019 – which he attributes as being one of the main triggers.
But Fury isn’t alone in this. According to Alcohol Change UK, there are an estimated 602,391 dependent drinkers – and only 18% are receiving treatment. It also states that 24% of adults in England and Scotland regularly drink over the recommended guidelines outlined by the Chief Medical Officer.
Here, we take a look at how alcohol can impact our personal relationships – and the relationship we have with ourselves.
Change in mood and inhibitions
When we drink, we can lose our inhibitions and act more impulsively – which at times can result in suicidal ideation, self-harm or an increase in risk-taking. If you experience suicidal feelings, you can call Samaritans at any time for help, or call 999 if you have hurt yourself or are considering doing so.
Create tension and anxiety
It is a false economy that alcohol helps ease nerves – and can in time lead to overreliance. The next day, when hungover, our sense of anxiety is also heightened – and is often referred to as "hangxiety." This happens because of how alcohol affects our brain receptors.
We may also struggle to piece together what happened the night before or start to ruminate on specific moments, leading us to spiral and feel bad about ourselves.
In relationships, this can cause tension, as our partner or loved ones might be mad at us for a reason we cannot remember – or because we are experiencing self-doubt.
Neglecting the needs of our loved ones
Partners can also feel as though they take second place to alcohol, or that their needs are not met if the other person relies heavily on drink. It can also stunt emotional connection, create fear and worry, and mean the other person is picking up more responsibility if the drinker is inebriated. In some instances, it can lead to the other person becoming more reliant on alcohol.
Impact our sex drive
As well as reducing our sexual sensitivity, alcohol can make it harder for men to get an erection, delay ejaculation or make you take more risks, such as forgoing a condom. In women, although one or two drinks may increase sexual desire, it can also decrease sexual arousal and make orgasms much harder to achieve.
In the long-term, having less sex can erode trust, communication and a sense of closeness in a relationship. It can also lead to the other person feeling isolated and undesirable.
Become more violent
Alcohol Change UK reports that alcohol is a factor in 39% of all violent crimes in England and 49% in Wales.
Research has also shown that alcohol can trigger conflict and be used as a means to “explain away” the issue.
Although violence isn’t a prerequisite when drinking alcohol, our lack of inhibitions and our impaired judgement can lead to violent acts and tendencies.
Getting help
If you or your partner suffer with alcohol addiction, you can contact Drinkline for free by calling 0300 123 1110 (weekdays 9am to 8pm, weekends 11am to 4pm).
Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) also offers meetings and a helpline for those worried about their addiction. It offers a free, 12-step programme towards sobriety.
Other resources can be found on the NHS website here.
Read more about alcohol:
Four ways quitting alcohol helps you look and feel better (Yahoo Life UK, 5-min read)
Six signs you’re drinking too much alcohol and what happens to your body when you quit (Yahoo Life UK, 5-min read)
I quit corporate life after realising I had a drink problem (Yahoo Life UK, 8-min read)
