Everyone has a right to organise the wedding of their dreams, choosing to include or forgo various traditions if they want.
However, one woman has taken to Reddit to ask about one particular tradition set to be included at an upcoming wedding, that has her seriously considering declining the invitation.
She explains she was invited to a wedding but has since found out that the newlyweds will be revealing all the gifts to everyone on the night. Apparently the practice is a tradition in the groom’s country but not the bride’s, which is where the heading is being held.
“The couple also stated they want nothing as gifts but money. I am pissed because they're basically saying ‘give us money and then we'll tell everyone how much you gave’, making it a competition on who will be more generous,” the woman wrote.
“Because of that, I am thinking to simply decline the invitation.”
Many agreed with her that revealing how much you receive as a gift to other wedding guests isn’t generally considered best practice.
“I thought ‘hm that's not so bad’ until you said they only want money. That's really weird,” one person responded.
“Buy a monopoly game and put all of the paper money in an envelope with a note that says ‘since y'all wanna be so fake’,” another suggested.
However, there are many cultures that openly give money at weddings. Many Turkish and Middle Eastern cultures and countries in eastern Europe have variations on wedding traditions surrounding money.
In Poland for example the Money dance or Dollar Dance traditionally sees the bride wear a purpose-made apron over her wedding dress, and guests must then pin money to her in exchange for a dance.
Though traditionally it involves male guests paying to dance with the bride, these days many female guests will do the same for a dance with the groom.
There were plenty of people that explained this to the disgruntled wedding guest, revealing they had gone to weddings with a similar tradition themselves.
“I've been to many of these due to my culture, some of them are really bad where the bride and the groom will be standing together, people will form a queue and start pinning money on them or handing over envelopes with cash in it right in front of the camera, and there will be someone there with a microphone announcing each 'gift',” one person explained. “I know it sounds terrible and understand your position, but it's not that bad and there won't be much judging, no one really cares.”
“The people getting married can follow any tradition that they want, and if you're not comfortable with that tradition you're under no obligation to participate in it,” another added.