Millie Mackintosh says marriage to Professor Green became 'quite toxic'

Millie Mackintosh has talked about about her divorce from her first husband Professor Green, explaining that the relationship had become "quite toxic".

The former Made In Chelsea star, 35, and Professor Green, real name Stephen Manderson, announced their split in February 2016 and went on to officially divorce after 30 months of marriage.

Since then, both have moved on: Mackintosh married fellow Made In Chelsea star Hugo Taylor in 2018 and the pair since welcomed two daughters while Manderson, 41, now co-parents son Slimane with former fiancée Karima McAdams.

Appearing on the latest episode of Brogan Garritt-Smith's podcast Getting There the mum-of-two gave an insight into the breakdown of her relationship with Manderson.

"I think we both were in our own struggles, and I think we maybe both thought we could fix each other, but it was, you know, we couldn't," she explained. "And ultimately, we both had our own struggles, and it just magnified it, and it was actually quite toxic."

Mackintosh went on to describe that period of her life in her 20s as a "turbulent time". "I was running away from my Made In Chelsea crowd, I just wanted to be in, you know, a different place. And it was my first serious relationship, and I truly didn't know myself well enough to be in a relationship at that point."

Despite things being difficult the former reality TV star said there isn't any "bad blood" between her and her ex husband. "We're in a nice place now," she said. "We both moved on, started families. We've sent each other pictures of our kids. It's, it feels like there's no bad blood there now."

Mackintosh also said she learnt a lot from that relationship. "There was definitely a lot of growth there," she explained. "Finding the strength to leave when, actually, I knew when we got married that it wasn't right. I knew before we got married, but I was too scared to call it off, because I was like, the shame of letting everyone down.

"I wish I'd just trusted my gut and not cared about what people thought, but I cared too much what people thought and I didn't want to disappoint everyone. I was like, but we've planned this wedding, it's gonna be amazing. Yeah, we'll figure it out afterwards."

Mackintosh isn't the only one to open up about past toxic relationships. Last year Katie Price described how a domestic abuse course helped her understand "patterns" in her relationship history.

The mother of five, 46, said on The Louis Theroux Podcast that the course taught her how to "detect controlling" behaviour and that she’s never been in a "normal healthy relationship."

"My downfall – I’ve had to learn all this in therapy – is men, because I jump from one to the other to the other," she said. "I need that neediness and then I end up in a toxic relationship, narcissist or gaslighting."

She said the course helped her to understand "red flags" in a relationship, as she added: "I’ve learned it’s the wrong men that I’ve picked. A lot of men don’t like independent women because they’re not in control, and I’m very independent."

Calm describes a toxic relationship as "one that consistently undermines your sense of wellbeing, happiness, and, at times, safety." While healthy conflict is normal in any relationship, there are "patterns of emotional harm, disrespect and manipulation" that wouldn’t exist in healthy, loving relationships.

Sue Armstrong, clinical services manager at relationship support charity, Relate tells Yahoo UK: "A relationship becomes unhealthy when one or both partners engage in behaviours that undermine each other’s well-being. Unhealthy relationships often involve patterns of control, manipulation, or disrespect.

"Rather than encouraging mutual support, intimacy, and growth, these relationships can drain energy, harm self-esteem, and create a hostile or damaging emotional environment. There may be an unbalanced power dynamic where one partner doesn’t feel safe or able to trust the other."

Here are four of the key signs you're in a toxic relationship:

1. Feeling anxious

"One of the most commonly overlooked signs of a toxic relationship is feeling anxious or 'walking on eggshells' around your partner, blaming yourself for ‘getting it wrong,’" Armstrong explains.

"If you constantly adjust your behaviour to avoid conflict or keep the peace, it suggest that the relationship may lack the emotional safety necessary for open communication." This is often downplayed but it's a subtle sign that something isn't right.

2. Constant criticism and manipulation

"Some key signs of a ‘toxic’ relationship include constant criticism or contempt, where a partner undermines your self-esteem, and attempts to control or manipulate aspects of your life," Armstrong continues. A healthy relationship should make you feel safe, confident and still have your autonomy and freedom without being monitored or manipulated to do something differently.

3. Lack of trust

Healthy relationships are built on a foundation of trust, love and respect, if there isn't any trust, only jealousy, then this can be very toxic. Armstrong continues: "A lack of trust, frequent emotional highs and lows that leave you feeling drained, and isolation from friends or family are also common indicators."

4. Feeling unsafe

If you are ever concerned about your physical or mental wellbeing during a relationship and feel unsafe, this is a concern. "If your relationship consistently leaves you feeling anxious, unsupported, or unsafe, these are strong signs that the dynamic may be unhealthy," Armstrong adds.

Read more about relationships:

• How to make a relationship work if you have mental health issues (Yahoo Life UK, 6-min read)

• Bad Sisters' Sharon Horgan says she wishes she ended her marriage sooner (Yahoo Life UK, 6-min read)

• How to tell if separating is right for you as Divorce Day arrives (Yahoo Life UK, 5-min read)