So Many Men Are Guilty Of Doing These 37 Things To Try And Impress Women, But In Reality, These Behaviors Are Major Icks
We stumbled upon two similar Reddit threads — one started by u/Extra_Inflation8099 and the other started by u/RedemptionKingu — that asked women to share things guys do to try and seem attractive to them that actually turn them off. We understand these responses may hurt feelings or lead to passionate conversations, but hey, don't shoot the messenger! Here's what we found:
1."Talking about other women who are texting them, want to date them, or are into them."
2."Swearing their heads off or acting aggressively. It just makes me want to move away from them. I cringe even harder when adult men talk like 14-year-old wannabe hip-hop stars."
3."Talking about money. It's great to be proud of your achievements, but continuing on in great detail is bad. I excused myself from a first date because he was bragging so much. I told him I didn't think we were a good match. I was very polite about it. He had rambled on about his education, prestigious sounding job, and how much he made previously, makes now, and was projected to make. He knew my title from my profile and made a few comments about it. He implied I made less because of the glass ceiling women face. He even commented on how lucky I must feel that we matched. I never said anything during his monologuing but kept chuckling internally because I made more than he did."
4."I'm really turned off by the guys who think of themselves as having 'elite' taste in anything to the point where they like to state all of their opinions as if they're objective facts — especially when these opinions always align with what is already critically acclaimed and not just their own unique tastes."
5."Talking about how sore I'm gonna be the next day. Some guys, for some reason, think they're doing sex the best when they're hurting their partner (outside of consensual kinks), and I don't think that's attractive or good."
6."Showing off their car while endangering both of our lives. I don't care how fast your car is. Slow the hell down. I want to live."
7."Putting down other men to try and elevate their image to me. It has the opposite of their desired effect."
8."When they think they're being a gentleman, but they're actually being possessive or controlling. For example, ordering food for you without asking what you like, being randomly aggressive towards other men for supposedly looking at you, critiquing your outfit/ asking you to cover you up when you go outside because he doesn't like other men looking, or putting down other women by saying things like, 'You're not like other girls/my exes.'"
9."Playing it too cool. We went out on a date, and you're either into me or not. I don't mind a bit of a flirty chase. It can be fun. But don't give me the cold shoulder or ghost me for a few days because you feel like if you're you're thoughtful and stay in touch, I might expect us to move in together next month. Does it hurt your masculinity to just outright let me know you like me?"
10."Talking over people in a group and always trying to be the loudest/most dominant person in conversation. It makes you look like a rude asshole."
11."Getting overly sexual immediately upon meeting (in person or on an app) and making crass suggestive comments. I've had situations where I was attracted to someone, but it tanked because they didn't demonstrate any patience or subtlety."
12."My partner sometimes gets in his head that it’s attractive when he does housework, usually because there’s been some commercial where a woman is drooling over her hunky husband vacuuming. But sorry, you’re not getting brownie points for participating in normal housework. I’m not going to suddenly throw down my Scrub Daddy and beg to be taken there in the kitchen because he wiped down the counter or cleaned the litter box."
13."Showing me pictures of the hot women they've dated. Yeah, this actually happened once."
14."Bragging about how they haven't cheated on you. Like they need a medal for it. Dude, it's the expected minimum."
15."Giving sexual compliments or compliments about certain body parts when they first meet you. Thanks, but sir, you are still a stranger. That just makes me uncomfortable. Can we get to know each other first?"
16."Posing in front of luxury cars that they don't own."
17."I'm in my early 50s, and I have had several older men in their 60s and 70s tell me that they are not attracted to women their own age (or that women their age 'can't keep up with them') but that they would definitely date someone my age. This is absolutely obnoxious, but I think they think it makes me feel like some hot young thing."
18."Mansplaining, especially regarding something I've been doing for years on my own with no problems. Also, touching you without your consent and/or only being affectionate in pursuit of sex."
19."Somehow, saying, 'I'm gonna get you pregnant,' became popular dirty talk, but let me tell you, nothing dries me out faster."
20."Bragging about how successful they are with women. It always comes across as desperate and not really believable."
21."When their whole personality is going to the gym. I've been with body types from obese to super skinny to a six-pack, and I actually enjoy a dad bod the most."
22."Negging. Once, some random dude in the club asked my friend and me (who is a different ethnicity) if we were sisters because we were both 'so short,' and then proceeded to say he only dates tall girls. I didn't even try to initiate a conversation with you, bro. You came over to us and immediately insulted us for no reason. Then he asked for my number an hour later when we were leaving. He was posted at the door looking for us or something because the club was super crowded and we ghosted him after saying we had to go to the bathroom."
23."Sending unsolicited dick pics thinking I'm magically going to get turned on. It's gross. I'm not turned on by those raggedy pictures."
24."When they play up their bedroom skills before we even do anything. 10/10, every man who brags about being good at sexual stuff isn't. The quiet, humble ones are best in my experience."
25."When they call you cringe pet names the minute they know you. Eww, get lost."
26."Talking in inspirational quotes when I'm trying to have a real conversation."
27."Constantly posting pictures of their car. Sorry, am I dating Lightning McQueen now?"
28."When they aspire to be an 'alpha male.'"
29."Too much cockiness. There can be a fine line between confidence and cockiness. Confidence and competence are very attractive, but cockiness oozes insecurity."
30."You ever had a guy pull out his guitar within the first few dates and force you to sit there and awkwardly listen while they noodle around or play 'Wonderwall'? Whether they’re amazing or bad at guitar, it’s just not attractive. Cooool, can we do something together, please?"
31."Telling you what they think you want to hear instead of what they actually believe regarding important things. It's unfair to either party and a recipe for disaster in a relationship. It wastes everyone's time. It, at best, makes them seem insecure and, at worst, like an outright manipulator who doesn't care what you want."
32."Pretending to have a deeper or raspier voice than they do. Also, any of those POV TikTok videos. He could be the hottest man on earth, but it still makes me want to hurl on sight."
33."When you communicate a boundary and tell them no and they keep pushing for you to say yes. This makes us angry, and when we express anger, they ask us, 'Why are you getting angry? Chill!'"
34."Making fun of something you like or enjoy and then wanting to show you what is 'actually cool/fun' because it is what they like."
35."Being 'loud.' It could be by laughing way too loud when in a group, giving some extra gas when driving (e.g., making the motor make that hard 'worm' sound), or wanting the final word, etc. Basically, all the way to force attention onto them. It's so freaking immature."
36."Telling you that your pets aren't actually important."
37.And: "Equating being stoic as strength and vulnerability as a weakness. Empathy is so hot."
Women, are there other things men seemingly do to "look hot" that you actually find icky or uncomfy? Tell us in the comments!
Note: Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.
