These are the worst festive faux pas when spending Christmas with your partner's family

A woman crosses her arms and looks away while sitting on the same sofa as a man, who is sat next to her
Making a mistake while spending Christmas with your partner's family could result in a huge turn-off. (Getty Images)

Spending the festive season with your partner’s family can be daunting at the best of times, but for new couples venturing into unknown territory, the first time you have Christmas with your significant other’s family can mark a huge step in your relationship.

While most people aspire to be on their best behaviour to make a good impression, sometimes a slip-up can lead to the “ick” - a term that refers to a feeling of disgust that can ruin a romance. Sometimes it can be as innocuous as not liking a certain food, and other times the “ick” can be brought on by impolite behaviour.

A survey conducted by greetings card marketplace thortful has revealed what the biggest festive faux pas you or your partner can make during Christmas time that might be a turn-off. Topping the list of “icks” is having too much to drink at a family gathering (38%), while not putting gravy on your Christmas dinner could also put you in danger with 10% of respondents.

The top 10 Christmas icks include:

  • Getting too drunk at the family gathering

  • If they don’t get on with your family

  • Putting the Christmas tree up too early

  • Talking politics at the Christmas dinner table

  • Being hungover on Christmas Day

  • Hating Christmas or being a Grinch

  • Not putting gravy on their Christmas dinner

  • Arguing with your family over a board game

  • Having a beige Christmas dinner and foregoing vegetables

  • Leaving their Christmas decorations up in January

Enjoying a few drinks at Christmas is fine but having a few too many might be a faux pas. (Getty Images)
Enjoying a few drinks at Christmas is fine but having a few too many might be a faux pas. (Getty Images)

To help you avoid making a bad impression, relationship consultant Mairead Molly explained why people get nervous about meeting a partner’s family, particularly at Christmas time.

“Meeting parents at any time of the year is always a little stressful, however at Christmas the nerves may be heightened due to the significance of the time of holiday. You might also feel like you’re being evaluated while you’re there,” she said.

“The pressure to convey warmth and compatibility during a festive season, centred around family and being together, can intensify the usual concerns about making a positive impression. Also, the fear of not meeting the expectations or fitting into family traditions can contribute to the nerves.”

To help you avoid making a bad impression, Molly gave her top advice:

Discuss the event with your partner

“Consider talking to your partner about their family dynamic before the event. Your partner might try to hide whatever stress they may be feeling about having you around their family, especially for the first time.

“Not vocalising your expectations in advance is a poor idea - talk to your partner about what you would like, expect, or need from them at the gathering. Make sure you are both on the same page before you arrive.”

Brush up on your manners

“Prepare yourself for small talk, offer to help in the kitchen, dress properly, and bring a gift as a small gesture. Respect their way of doing things even though you may not agree with it – sometimes it’s best to say nothing!

No phones

“Put your phone away and relax. It can also help to chat to as many people as you can to find someone you click with, as this can help build relationships.”

Watch your drink

“The key here is to maintain self-control and don’t have too much to drink. Make sure you go in with that mindset. There is nothing worse than having too much to drink and making a fool of yourself - no matter how nice everyone is.”

Read more about navigating relationships at Christmas: