Wedding planners, workers, and everyone in between didn't hold ANYTHING back. They had shocking experiences with engaged and married couples and saw some pretty major red flags proving that all marriages don't have a happily ever after.
So, here are some shocking stories straight from wedding planners/workers:
Note: Some submissions were pulled from BuzzFeed Community users.
Note: Some stories include topics of verbal and domestic abuse. Please proceed with caution.
1."I remember one couple who really wanted an over-the-top wedding that would be good enough to be featured in a popular luxury wedding magazine. They spared no expense. They became so obsessed with this that they were even choosing members of their bridal party based on their looks rather than their relationship with them. The bride had two brothers — one brother looked like a model for Hugo Boss, and her other brother who looked a little bit like Thor. Well, only the 'Hugo Boss' brother was selected to be a groomsman (things like this caused a lottttt of tension between family members, as well as fights between the couple)."
"It was awkward a lot of the time. I knew for sure this couple wouldn't make it for long. Interestingly enough, the couple divorced a week before their wedding was featured in that luxury bridal magazine."
2."The ceremony was coming up, but the groom was nowhere to be found — everyone was looking for him. We looked in the groom's lounge (a hangout room for the groom and groomsmen), and there he was: banging the maid of honor. Shame, shame, shame."
3."I sell engagement and wedding rings, and the biggest red flag I've seen is when one half of the couple tries to bully their fiancé into getting what they want. I see it from both men and women. Sometimes it’ll be the guy trying to get the girl to wear something with huge diamonds that clearly makes her feel uncomfortable — sometimes it’s the girl trying to get the guy to wear something more fashion-forward when he just wants a plain ring. The worst thing though is when the person getting bullied just gives up and says 'fine.' That tells me they’ve already accepted that the marriage won’t last. I used to ask guys who were about to propose what inspired them to pop the question. I've heard this answer so often that I stopped asking it completely: 'It’s been XYZ years, and I guess it’s just time.'"
4."A bride was nervous on her wedding day, so she got drunk before the ceremony (she had to be helped down the aisle). Then, when the ceremony was over, instead of kissing the groom ('we now pronounce you man and wife'), she licked him from chin to eyeball. She fell during the recessional and knocked over a waiter carrying champagne. She couldn't be in there during the post-ceremony photoshoot because she kept falling. When it was time to cut the cake, we couldn't find her. Our staff went to her hotel room and found her covered in her own vomit, still in her wedding dress. She had the audacity to ask for a refund after all of this. They're divorced now..."
5."I worked at a hotel in the kitchen, and we did a wedding where the cake was brought in from Walmart. The groom was caught making out with a bridesmaid in a conference room, and we saw the bride throw her ring into a storm drain across the street."
6."I’m a photographer, and I’ve shot three weddings — I hated them (bless the people who do it). Anyway, at one of the weddings, the groom called the bride unattractive (she was stunning and used to model — he was cute, but generically cute). He kept taking shots of vodka with his boys, and asked for a full-on photoshoot with his mom. He was definitely a mama’s boy because his mom was hovering the whole time (and you know it’s bad when his mom suggested he take photos with his wife). He told me to STFU every time I redirected, so after the third time that happened (and flashed me his junk?), I started packing up. When he started yelling at me, I told him no one talks to me like that, and I’d send them a refund. I knew right then the marriage wouldn’t last."
"He started crying and said he’d 'behave.' But it didn't matter because two weeks later, the marriage was annulled. No one wanted the photos, but I was paid in full for photos no one wanted.
When I offered to refund the bride's dad half anyway, he said the bride knew when the groom yelled at me and cried that it wasn’t going to work — so I earned it. I guess the whole fam was trying to get them to call it off."
7."I worked weddings as a server for about a year and saw a ton of different things, but one stands out specifically. This venue was on a golf course and in the middle of the reception, all of the groomsmen and the groom got drunk and decided it was a good idea to go swimming in one of the ponds in their tuxes. The bride was standing on the back porch screaming at them, asking him how he could be such a dumbass and lamenting loud enough for the world to hear that she married him. I didn't see the bride for the rest of the reception after that. Pretty sure that marriage ended pretty quickly..."
8."I ran a fairly upmarket hotel and restaurant that sometimes hosted weddings. I made a rookie error and booked a wedding on Christmas Eve. This should've been a warning sign, as it showed a pretty significant lack of consideration for friends and family making them travel across the country on one of the most irritating days of the year. They turned up three hours early, and the battle axe of a bride proceeded to shout at us for not being prepared (surrounded by her incredibly embarrassed but not unsurprised family). There were various other red flags throughout the night, but the main one was when the husband got super drunk on whiskey and asked me to go to his hotel room with him and 'break him in' as a married man. I politely refused."
9."It was a quick engagement and marriage, and I got the feeling maybe too quick. The wedding and reception were at the groom's parents' place, and his mom had a lot of input (as did his sister). The bride got shut down whenever she talked. On the day of the wedding, I arrived to shoot the bride getting ready. She was alone with the hair and makeup person. I thought that person was her friend, but she wasn’t (her bridesmaids weren't even there). Two hours went by, and she couldn't get a hold of them. The makeup person left, and I helped her put on her veil and shoes. I felt so bad for her — this was supposed to be her big day, and there she was: having a stranger put on her veil and telling her she looked great."
"The bridesmaids finally showed up (the maid of honor was the groom's sister). When the bride questioned them, the sister said they went out for breakfast — the bride then asked why they didn't tell her, and they got mad at her.
The groom was also invited to breakfast along with the groomsmen, and they were all drinking at 11:30 a.m. The kicker? None of the bridesmaids were dressed or had their hair and makeup done, and the wedding was in 30 minutes.
We were supposed to go to a nearby beach for photos, but it never happened because the groom talked to every person in attendance in the longest receiving line situation. He kept drinking as the sun was setting — I told the couple I had zero photos of them alone, and we needed to go.
He responded: 'Yeah, yeah, after the speeches.' He made a speech after several of his friends did (and most of his had nothing to do with his bride). When he finished, I approached the bride — she looked at me and said: 'You can go home now.'
The groom was in the middle of a group of people, chugging a beer and laughing loudly while his beautiful new bride sat alone, seemingly wondering what the fuck she got herself into. I saw her six months later at a restaurant, and before I could ask, she told me she left him."
10."I used to work at a popular wedding venue. The bride and groom came in the day before for rehearsal, checked the decorations, and played a sweet video of themselves (standard wedding stuff). The next day, the bride and groom arrived fighting the entire time until the reception where the groom proceeded to drink a lot before speeches and had to be carried out. Didn't even get to play that video. It was the best shift ever, got to go home early and take home a bunch of food already paid for."
11."I’m the director of catering at a hotel and I have so many stories, but one of my favorites was when the bride left after dinner was served. She went upstairs to her room because she was tired — she texted her husband and he came up with her. He left and then never returned — the party went on. She came back without her husband saying she needed 'a couple of drinks.' At the end of the night she went to an after party at a bar with the groomsmen (just the groomsmen)."
12."On the night of the wedding, I (the wedding planner) brought the bottle of champagne up to the room along with some other things we did for a wedding night. I quickly opened the door and walked straight in. The bride was bent over a chair with her wedding dress over her head, having sex with the best man."
13."I photographed the groom and saw his eyes light up when a guest arrived. I looked over, and it was a random cute woman in a short dress. He smiled, walked up to the woman, picked her up, and swung her in his arms. It was the best smile I captured of the groom all day. His marriage didn’t last six months from what I heard."
14."When I used to work the occasional wedding on weekends, there was this one couple who made me think, 'Yeah, she’s going to end up alone.' She took the microphone in the middle of a song that everyone was happily dancing to and then kept saying, 'It’s my day, but I’ll wait until you're done with your conversation!' 'Don’t worry — it’s only my wedding day.' 'Helloooo, bride wants to talk!' Blah blah blah — it was hella rude. When she was finally satisfied with the silence, she started her speech by berating everyone for taking so long to be quiet and then went on to talk about how she’s so happy and she loves her husband. It was awful — if I was a guest, I would’ve taken my gift and left."
15."I worked in a hotel, and an engaged couple had a huge rehearsal dinner which spilled out into the lobby. Everyone in the lobby found out that the bride hated the groom's parents, she was pregnant, and she had no idea who the father was. Half the guest list packed up and checked out the next day. They still got married."
16."Former ballroom dance instructor. I remember thinking many times when choreographing couple's first dances, 'Why are you with him/her?' They were rude to each other and didn't care about the other's viewpoint. I know it was just a small section of their life, but you just know sometimes that this will not work long-term. Also, it was oh so much fun when they came in and you could tell they just had a huge fight in the car."
17."The only people who hated the groom more than the bride's family were the groom's family. The nicest thing anyone said about him was at least he doesn't beat her like her last husband did. The best man's speech was an angry, drunken tirade about how you're not supposed to marry 'the skank' you take home from the bar. He then turned to the bride and literally screamed, 'You stole my best friend.' More about how she broke the rules, she's a one night stand that just never went home again."
18."I heard from a wedding planner that the bride and her bridesmaids went through at least 10 bottles of champagne the morning of the wedding, and were ridiculously drunk. Two of the three bridesmaids fell and had trouble getting up on the way down the aisle, and the bride and the maid of honor made it down the aisle but with great difficulty. The groom was basically holding the bride up for the entirety of the ceremony, and she loudly refused to sit in a chair. The wedding planner said the couple argued the night before over whether they were going to drink before the wedding. The groom wanted to stay sober until the reception, but the bride disagreed."
"The wedding planner said they had a massive fight in the limo on the way to take pictures, which the bride's side of the wedding party was in no shape to participate in — so they skipped them. The photographer ended up doing a goofy shoot with the groomsmen since they had already paid for photos. The bride and bridesmaids sat in the limo drinking.
At the reception, the bride was passed out, and the groom made an apology speech to the guests. Then, he took an Uber home alone."
19."Many years ago, I had a side hustle doing cakes and would often get orders for wedding cakes. Long story short, the bride-to-be threw a full-fledged tantrum and locked herself in my bathroom. She refused to come out because the groom was 'unreasonably insisting' on having a say in what the cake flavor was going to be. I said through the door: 'Get out of my bathroom!' and all I got was a whiny, defiant little: 'NoooOooooooOooooooooO!!!!!!' She was about 22."
20."I'm a musician and the son of a wedding photographer. I've actually played in a band whose leader (on the wedding day) took a deposit for the divorce party that was to follow. The groom's mother laid it down and said: 'I give it six months.' Nine months later, there we were celebrating the divorce, and the bride wasn't present."
21.And finally: "I work as a bartender for weddings, and I have a few stories. One was when I helped a crying bride at the end of the night wait for a car because the groom went who knows where. As she was crying, all she kept saying was how she had made a mistake and never should have married him. Eventually a car without him came and picked her up, and I felt sad for her."
"Another one was the groom was so obnoxious to staff and everyone at the wedding that eventually the cops were called on him (not once, but twice).
Supposedly he was the same way at the tastings and pre-events, and he just got worse the more he drank. The second time the cops were called, the reception ended."
Note: Some submissions were edited for length and/or clarity.