12 Incredibly Restrictive Religious Rules About Sex People Followed In The Middle Ages
Back in the Middle Ages (a.k.a. the Medieval era, approximately 476-1450 A.D.), people's daily lives were very centered around the rules laid out by the church. According to the World History Encyclopedia, "The Church focused on regulating and defining an individual's life in the Middle Ages, [and] it was...recognized as the manifestation of God's will and presence on earth."
"The dictates of the Church were not to be questioned, [and] it was understood that the Creator of the universe was...in control."
During this time, some clergymen wrote penitentials, which were essentially guidebooks for priests.
Basically, during confession, a priest would ask questions of their churchgoer based on potential sins listed in the penitential, then use the prescribed punishment to decide exactly what the sinner needed to do to atone for those sins.
Penance, or repentance for committing a sin, could come in many forms. Thomas Oakley says in "The Origins of Irish Penitential Discipline" that "usually, the penances were assigned in terms of severe fasting." But there were other options, such as "the giving of alms, marital continence [abstentinence], prayer and lamentations, seclusion in a monastery, the amending of one's morals, and restitution."
Feels like claiming you've "amended your morals" might be getting off a little easy compared to the severe fasting option.
Because these penitentials are extremely old religious texts, they were written primarily in Latin. Fortunately, Medieval Handbooks of Penance by John T. McNeill and Helena M. Gamer contains English translations of a number of these works, allowing us to take a look at these 12 wildly restrictive laws they contained, which Medieval Christians were expected to abide by:
1.Something as small as a certain look might require a 40-day penance.
The Penitential of Cummean says, "He who is polluted by an evil word or glance, yet did not wish to commit bodily fornication, shall do penance for twenty or forty days according to the degree of his sin."
2.Confessing to even thinking about sex meant someone would have to do penance.
The Penitential of Cummean says, "He who for a long time is lured by imagination to commit fornication and repels the thought too gently shall do penance for one or two or more days, according to the duration of the imagination."
So not only would you need to be wary of someone giving you eyes, but you'd better not think about it afterward — and if you did, you'd better repel your own thoughts as soon as possible.
3.Wanting sex but not being able to have it could earn you a year of penance.
The Penitential of Cummean says, "He who merely desires in his mind to commit fornication, but is not able, shall do penance for one year, especially in the three forty-day periods."
4.Simply imagining the act with a crush was problematic, too.
The Penitential of Theodore says, "He who loves a woman in his mind shall seek pardon from God; but if he has spoken [to her], that is, of love and friendship, but is not received by her, he shall do penance for seven days."
Is there anything worse than being rejected by your crush only to have to ask for forgiveness from God about it afterward?
5.Of course, thinking about sex was akin to dreaming about sex, which was, unsurprisingly, also not allowed.
"He who is willingly polluted during sleep shall arise and sing nine psalms in order, kneeling," The Penitential of Cummean says. "On the following day, he shall live on bread and water; or he shall sing thirty psalms, kneeling at the end of each. He who desires to sin during sleep, or is unintentionally polluted, fifteen psalms, he who sins and is not polluted, twenty-four."
6.People were not supposed to do any sexual acts that weren't intended explicitly for procreation...this includes mouth stuff.
The Penitential of Theodore considers "Qui semen in os miserit" (translation via translate.com: "He who puts the seed in the mouth") to be "the worst of evils," and McNeill and Gamer note that "it was his judgment that both [participants in this offense] shall do penance to the end of life; or twelve years; or as above seven."
7.This meant no sexual acts were meant to be performed alone, either.
"If she practices solitary vice, she shall do penance for the same period," says The Penitential of Theodore.
8.The church expected only heterosexual sex between married partners.
The Penitential of Theodore says, "If a woman practices vice with a woman, she shall do penance for three years." And "he who after his twentieth year defiles himself with a male shall do penance for fifteen years. A male who commits fornication with a male shall do penance for ten years."
9.Even if a couple was married and attempting to procreate as the church decreed, there were still a lot of restrictions around their sex life.
The Penitential of Finnian says, "Married people, then, must mutually abstain during three forty-day periods in each single year, by consent for a time, that they may be able to have time for prayer for the salvation of their souls. And on Sunday night or Saturday night, they shall mutually abstain, and after the wife has conceived, he shall not have intercourse with her until she has borne her child, and they shall come together again for this purpose."
The Penitential of Theodore says, "He who has intercourse on the Lord's day shall seek pardon from God and do penance for one or two or three days."
And The Penitential of Cummean says, "He who is in a state of matrimony ought to be continent during the three forty-day periods and on Saturday and on Sunday, night and day, and in the two appointed weekdays, and after conception, and during the entire menstrual period."
Got it. No sex on Saturdays or Sundays, or for some random 40-day period three times throughout the year, or while pregnant. Plus, two other appointed weekdays and any time someone is menstruating.
10.Anyone who didn't follow at least some rules of abstinence within their marriage was considered a sinner.
The Penitential of Finnian mandates that there be "continence in marriage, since marriage without continence is not lawful, but sin, and marriage is permitted by the authority of God not for lust but for the sake of children."
And The Penitential of Cummean adds, "After a birth he shall abstain, if it is a son, for thirty-three [days]; if a daughter, for sixty-six [days]."
What can we say? Our man Cummean loves an abstention period.
11.Though sex was only intended for procreation, if you had trouble getting pregnant, you were also supposed to abstain.
The Penitential of Finnian says, "If anyone has a barren wife, he shall not put away his wife because of her barrenness, but they shall both dwell in continence and be blessed if they persevere in chastity of body until God pronounces a true and just judgment upon them."
So at some point, if you were unable to conceive, you'd be expected to just be abstinent forever — which doesn't really seem like it'd be particularly helpful. But at least that meant a woman wouldn't be "put away," which is giving Edward Rochester in Jane Eyre vibes.
12.And finally, this charmer from The Penitential of Theodore: "A husband ought not to see his wife nude."
I'll be honest: I'm not entirely sure how this would be managed when everyone's bathing in a giant barrel of water, and the mere existence of this image tells me it was probably nearly impossible.
Ultimately, McNeill and Gamer say, "The penitentials...helped to lead our forefathers from a low and primitive to a higher stage of moral culture. But they [also] lent themselves too readily to gross abuses and sowed the seed of an evil harvest." Their use gradually fell out of favor.
Personally, I'm happy to see that society has moved into a more progressive view of sex and sexuality than folks had back in the medieval era, and I hope it stays that way. No need to go back to monitoring each others' proclivities and bathing in a big ol' dirty communal tub.
