The recipe for a perfect marriage, according to happily wedded couples

·Lifestyle Writer, Yahoo Life UK
·4-min read
Perfect marriage: Husband and wife embracing on couch. (Getty Images)
Want the perfect marriage? Welcome the good and the bad. (Getty Images)

The recipe for a 'perfect marriage' has been revealed, and it's more specific than you might think.

The ultimate married couple should have six meaningful conversations and three long walks a month, new research claims.

But, surprisingly, they should also have two 'barn-storming' rows every month, to help keep the equilibrium.

Couple getting ready for work and they are arguing. Bathroom interior, morning time.
Two arguments a month make for a happy marriage. (Getty Images)

Both physical intimacy and words of affirmation are a big part of a successful marriage. The most contented couples estimate they have sex five times a week, and say 'I love you' up to 20 times a fortnight, a study of 2,000 UK happily wedded adults reveals.

They also kiss two or three times a day, and cuddle 11 times every week.

Those happily married benefit from taking a short break away together twice a year, and two longer holidays, if possible, with quality time the top ranking component of a happy marriage.

Individuals pursuing their own hobbies and interests, allowing their other half to see them at their worst, being silly with each other, looking after each other when sick, and feeling you can be completely yourself are among the top 10 ways couples can enjoy a peaceful marriage.

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Other important factors also include listening to each other moan about work, showing one another how proud you are of them, and being respectful in front of others.

Simon Thompson, managing director of Warner Leisure Hotels, which commissioned the research, said, "We weren’t surprised to see that taking short breaks is one of the secret ingredients to a happy marriage.

“This quality time spent enjoying shared interests seems to be a winning formula for a lasting marriage, along with placing value on time apart pursuing individual hobbies.

“However, as this survey clearly shows, it takes a good mix of humour, affection, understanding and interest to keep a relationship exciting.”

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Shot of a young couple having relationship problems at home
Not rising to your partner being moody or annoying will help keep the peace in your marriage. (Getty Images)

In terms of how to manage disagreements, tips include forgiving bad habits like bumping the car or shrinking favourite clothes, not going to sleep on an argument, and not making a big deal of it when the other is being moody or annoying.

Many also vouch that trying new things together, going on weekends away, and surprising each other with unexpected gifts helps keep things fresh, the survey conducted via One Poll found.

Some of the more comfortable couples in the survey put the success of their marriage down to picking their battles, not being offended if the other uses the loo in front of them, and, crucially, always taking their partner's side, regardless of whether they are right or not...

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Equality within the household is also an important factor, with a fair distribution of chores listed as helping to keep the peace, as well as both being willing to make up and laughing together after an argument.

Some 63% of married adults also place a lot of importance on their partner behaving romantically, with one in five impressed with the larger gestures, like booking a trip away, the research found.

More than seven in 10 agree that spending time away together without the distraction of everyday life can add more excitement and remind them why they love each other.

That said, it doesn't have to be go big or go home, as a more than a third (36%) are also content with smaller gestures, such as occasionally going for dinner out.

The bar for acts of kindness is also relatively low, with almost four in 10 considering everyday gestures like putting the bins out romantic.

Lesbian love and care concept. LGBT transgender female couple hugging embracing on romantic date with eyes closed showing their passion and trustful relationship
Happily married couples enjoy acts of kindness ranging from booking trips away, to eating dinner out, to taking the bins out. (Getty Images)

Simon Thompson added, "The definition of romance differs from person to person.

"Some are content with tiny little gestures on a regular basis, and others want the full hearts and flowers approach to love.

"Whatever your preference, the key to a happy marriage appears to be time – time with each other, time apart, time to forgive, time to laugh, and time to understand."

Interestingly, that time apart also includes accepting that sometimes you get a better night's sleep...apart.

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