My mother-in-law and I went on our first trip together. We needed it more than we realized.
I've taken lots of trips with my family and my mother-in-law during my 20-year marriage.
However, she and I have never traveled alone together until recently.
We had a great time on our trip together, and both of us needed it more than we realized.
As someone who grew up in a family that wasn't super close, I've always found the "in-law" aspect of marriage to be a bit of a shock. My husband comes from a close-knit clan made up of siblings, aunts and uncles, grandparents, and cousins, and when we first started dating in the early 2000s, I struggled to make room for so many new people in my life. An only child raised by parents I can only describe as reclusive, I even struggled to let his mom in, though she has always been lovely and the complete opposite of the meddling mother-in-law stereotype.
Now in my mid-40s with two teenagers, I've grown up a lot since meeting my husband. I'm continuing to work to improve myself through things like weight loss surgery, nearly a year of sobriety, and lots of therapy sessions, and getting older has only made me appreciate my mother-in-law's quiet strength and unconditional love even more.
While we've gone on plenty of vacations, like a recent cruise, together as a family, she and I had never traveled alone on a "girl's weekend-style" trip until this fall. I had visited Branson, Missouri, once before with some girlfriends, and even then, I remember thinking how much my mother-in-law would love the area. A solid weekend of one-on-one time there with my husband's mom made our relationship even closer, and I can't wait to take more trips with her in the future.
Our itinerary was the perfect mix of things we both enjoy
My mother-in-law and I have different interests: I love reading and Taylor Swift, and she loves watching British detective shows, for example. Instead of fretting over how to include these things in our trip, I focused on things we both like, like delicious restaurants and live theater.
Branson was a great spot for these things, and we spent our time seeing dinner shows, dining at celebrity chef-owned restaurants, and enjoying theme park snacks, crafting demonstrations, and entertainment at Silver Dollar City. Focusing on things I knew we could bond over made the trip all the more easygoing.
We had great conversations and made lasting memories
I rarely get alone time with my mother-in-law when she visits us since my husband and teenagers want to spend time with her, too. On our trip, I experienced a new side of her, and we had some pretty incredible conversations about serious topics we'd never discuss in front of my husband or our kids.
Learning more about her life experiences was a gift, and along the way, we also shared lots of laughs and made memories we'll both hold onto forever.
The trip felt like a much-needed break from recent struggles
My mother-in-law lost her husband in March 2022, and in March 2023, one of her three adult sons also died. I've often commented that she's experienced more loss in the last two years than seems fair for one person to have to endure, and going away on this trip with her felt like a great way to take a break from grief and spend time having fun.
When we parted ways at the airport at the end of the weekend, she hugged me and said she didn't realize how much she needed a weekend away. Knowing I could lessen her load in this season of her life left me incredibly thankful I invited her to go away with me.
I was reminded me she's more than my husband's mom — she's also my friend
As the mom of two kids, I often think about what kind of mother-in-law I'll be one day to my kids' partners and hope I'll make whoever they choose to settle down with feel welcome without adding stress to their lives. My mother-in-law has always done just that, even when I've been an anxious new mom or a stressed-out bride-to-be and given her a harder time than she deserved. I've always hoped I approach my kids and their partners with the same grace she has treated me, and I'm so glad I've had her as a role model.
I didn't realize I needed a getaway with just my mother-in-law, either. At my age and stage in life, I value her wisdom and life experience more than ever, and I loved taking a trip with her where we could focus solely on building our friendship. My only regret is that I didn't start traveling one-on-one with my mother-in-law sooner, as I think it would have been a great practice to add to our relationship early on.
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