Midlife women are happiest with their sex lives, study finds

·3-min read
Women over 35 are more likely to want to increase their libido (Getty)
Women over 35 are more likely to want to increase their libido. (Getty)

Like wine, it seems sex just gets better with age. A new study has found that women aged 45 to 54 are “happiest” with their sex lives.

The study, from sexual wellness app Lover, asked 1,500 coupled-up women about their sex lives and discovered that those in this age group were the most likely to say there was “no room for improvement”.

Women aged 18 to 24 were the second happiest group, followed by those aged 25 to 34, 35 to 44 and 55 to 64.

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“The primary reason the data suggests women in the 50+ bracket report more satisfying sex is they are more likely to consistently orgasm,” says Dr Britney Blair, co-founder of the Lover app.

“They are more confident in asking a lover for what they want and better understand how their body experiences pleasure.”

Respondents also revealed that the top five things that would help to increase sexual pleasure post-pandemic are: increased self confidence, romance, foreplay, higher libido and less anxiety.

Sex can (and should) be enjoyed at any age (Getty)
Sex can (and should) be enjoyed at any age. (Getty)

Of those surveyed, 17.4% said a confidence boost would improve their sex lives.

“In order to get the sex that you want, you need to know what your body enjoys. We are each unique. If you explore what turns you on, you can more readily share with your partner what you need,” Blair says.

“Masturbation or solo sex is the single best way for women to train their body to experience more sexual pleasure with a partner. 

"Taking time to masturbate and using a variety of ways to stimulate your body trains you for climax. This training can then be translated to partnered play.”

Those in the 35 to 44 age group said a “better mental connection” with their partner would improve their sex life, while 15.9% of those aged 18 to 24 said more foreplay would help.

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Women over 35 also had the most desire for an increased libido, and 9% of all respondents said a reduction in stress levels would have the biggest impact on their sex lives.

“Stress and anxiety has such a monumental effect on our sex lives. If you’re too much in your head during sex, it can impact your ability to reach orgasm,” Blair says.

“This doesn’t have to be relationship stress either – everyday stress can have just as much of an impact in the bedroom. We spend most of our lives on autopilot, not being present.”

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To help combat this, Blair recommends trying to focus on the moment at hand rather than thinking about the day’s stresses in your head.

“Your mind and body are like a dimmer switch," she says. 

"Take a moment to disentangle from your day and move into a state of openness to the erotic. 

“Create a space that is free from distractions, if you choose your bedroom, make sure you don’t have distracting clutter everywhere.

"If you have kids, make sure they're settled down and lock your door so you’re not worrying about them walking in.

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“While maintaining focus is challenging for most of us, practising makes it easier. The more you practice, the more you’ll be able to completely immerse yourself in your experience and be present to pleasure.

"When we’re stressed, sex does tend to fall down our priorities list. Just remember to give you and your partners a break and be kind to each other. Getting your sex life back on track is easier than you think."

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