Fearne Cotton reflects on past: 'I wonder how many Mondays I lost to blueness'

Watch: Fearne Cotton: Depression made me feel ashamed

Addressing the concept of 'Blue Monday', Fearne Cotton has shared a heartfelt post pointing out that "it doesn't matter what day of the week it is...you can be blue ANY given day".

The 40-year-old television and radio presenter, podcast-host and author has also shared her own journey with 'blueness', revealing that she lost many Mondays to blueness when she was "commercially more 'successful'", whereas now she's older, and arguably less famous, she's at a point where she feels "pure joy" on a lunch break walk.

Posting a fresh faced, smiling, blue-skied winter walk photo of herself to Instagram, she wrote, "Blue Monday, blue Tuesday, blue Wednesday, blue Thursday, blue Friday, blue Saturday, blue Sunday, it doesn't matter what day of the week it is, or time of year, you can be blue ANY f*cking given day."

She added, "You can also feel absolute happiness on any day for no reason at all," hinting that despite blue Monday being known as 'the most depressing day of the year," the complexities of our emotions aren't controlled by how sad or happy a day is supposed to feel.

Cotton has gone from being in the centre of the spotlight, hosting shows like Top of the Pops, BBC Radio 1and Xtra Factor, to carving out her own space in the wellness world among among other things, notably her Happy Place podcast where she has honest conversations with celebrities and 'incredible people' about mental health. She's shared how her journey over the years has affected her happiness.

She wrote, "When I look back on my thirties I wonder how many Mondays I lost to blueness. Probably tons. I might have been commercially more 'successful' back then, interviewed many famous people, been invited to glamorous events or other stuff that you might believe cultivates happiness but I didn't have the experience or knowledge to take command of my reactions to the world around me."

Read more: Fearne Cotton reveals she suffered 'imposted syndrome' while presenting Top of the Pops

LONDON, ENGLAND - FEBRUARY 24: (EDITORIAL USE ONLY)  Fearne Cotton attends the BRIT Awards 2016 at The O2 Arena on February 24, 2016 in London, England.  (Photo by Luca Teuchmann/Getty Images)
Being invited to glamorous events doesn't equate happiness, explains Fearne Cotton (Getty Images)

Now, she recognises she feels happiness from the little things, explaining, "I've just been on a lunch break walk in between writing a new kids book and planing my Bigger Than Us event tomorrow [now today], and I felt pure joy.

"An elderly man on a bench with his face in the sun, The Beatles in my headphones, great colours all around, each step in my muddy trainers a privilege. I'm the same person now but I see the world very differently."

Cotton is gearing up to launch her new book Bigger Than Us tonight, touching on subjects like ritual and ceremony, non religious prayer, the law of attraction, looking for signs, mediums and intuition, shamanism and more.

Read more: Fearne Cotton opens up about her recent panic attack: what to do if you suffer from them

LONDON, ENGLAND - JULY 10: Fearne Cotton wins an award for 'Spotify Podcast Champion' at The British Podcast Awards 2021 at Brockwell Park on July 10, 2021 in London, England. (Photo by Stuart C. Wilson/Getty Images)
Fearne Cotton wins 'Spotify Podcast Champion' award at The British Podcast Awards, London, 2021 (Getty Images)

With a history of depression, she acknowledges she isn't immune to low days or painful outcomes, but says she's not lugging her past around with her anymore, and while she might have faced criticism, judgement, panic and a lack of safety from strangers and being in the public eye, she says she now doesn't need to carry that around with her every day.

"Today I choose to stay in the moment which is a feeling of gratitude for a lunch break walk in the sun! What a joy," says Cotton.

She also addresses a heartfelt message to those who might be suffering, encouraging them that they too will "feel that sun on your face again one day".

"For those of you tackling hard stuff at the moment I send you love. From my own personal experience and from the plethora of individuals I've interviewed who have often been to hell and back, I know you'll get through it. It might be sticky, painful and soul destroying but you will feel that sun on your face again one day," she says.

"I don't want that to sound flippant or whimsical or to be triggering, I just believe it to be true."

Read more: This celebrity-backed morning shower trick might be the mood booster we all need

LONDON, ENGLAND - NOVEMBER 11: Fearne Cotton and Paloma Faith attend the UK launch of Frida on November 11th, 2021 at Chiltern Firehouse in London, England, hosted by Frida CEO and Founder, Chelsea Hirschhorn.

Fearne led the discussion with Chelsea and Paloma, which was a raw and honest discussion of all things birth, postpartum and parenting. Frida, on a mission to encourage open conversations about what goes down in the delivery room and beyond, is debuting in the UK this week.
Guests included Charlene White, Julia Restoin Roitfeld, Annie Price, Michelle Kennedy, Anna Whitehouse (Mother Pukka), Clemmie Telford, Pippa Vosper, Grace Woodward and Megha Mittal.

Frida is a range of postpartum and baby products. Already adored by US celebrity mums, Frida’s solution-based product range launches in Boots and Amazon. 

Paloma said, “It shouldn’t be called a birth plan, it should be called ‘my ideal situation’. One word to define my postpartum body is deflated. Like a balloon not popped properly. But women’s postpartum bodies are not celebrated enough. I always hid my body but now I’m 40 I’m like, this body has done some shit! My advice to an expectant mother is don’t be alone. You are not. So many women have done it. Everyone wants to talk about it. You can feel shame about it not being perfect. But so many feel this.”
Fearne shared her feelings noting that “It’s an amazing, game changing, life changing moment but we don’t celebrate it enough and we should. When I was giving birth I was roaring like a lion, I loved every minute of the roar! But afterwards, I was so terrified of going for a poo, I just kept asking for more dates and figs! No one told me about cluster feeding and when you're exhausted and starving, and you get stuck for about two hours - it can be a lot. My top tip would be to try and get someone there every night for support. (Photo by Lia Toby/Getty Images for Fridababy)
Fearne Cotton and Paloma Faith attend UK launch of Frida at Chiltern Firehouse in London, England, November 2021, discussing birth, postpartum and parenting (Getty Images for Fridababy)

Celebrity friends have shown support for her post, with Denise Vanouten leaving a heart, Ashley James commenting "Beautiful Caption", and Anna Friel with, "Good for you and well said. Thank you for always sharing."

Fans have also called her an "inspiration", "honest", and "uplifting", sharing their own stories of blueness and thanking her for picking or lifting them up.

Watch: Fearne Cotton talks you through the A to Z of Happiness