1. NGL, this would be hella confusing:
Imagine you were a vampire nowhere near the Middle East and don’t know who Jesus is but the day after he dies you gotta figure out why lower case t’s started hurting.
— Andrew Nadeau (@TheAndrewNadeau) July 2, 2021
2.*Stands up and aggressively applauds*
3. I can confidently say that I've never seen this content warning on any other movie:
I can’t stop laughing at the reasoning for Twister’s PG-13 rating pic.twitter.com/SdIZtVuRyH
— Blake Wexler (@BlakeWexler) June 15, 2020
4. This is definitely a brand new sentence, but it's also cute as heck:
Apparently it works like in Field of Dreams. If you hang the flag, the gays will come.And they will steal every fucking one of your dinosaur stickers.
— Professor Helena Handbasket, Miskatonic U (@PrettiestFrog) October 5, 2023
5. Apologies to all my friends and relatives, but I will now be saying, "Brother I would not pay an acorn a decade," alllllll the time from now on:
A dollar a year? brother i would not pay an acorn a decade https://t.co/175iSucLCl
— Vinny Thomas (@vinn_ayy) October 17, 2023
Chesnot / Getty Images Twitter: @vinn_ayy
6.Poetry for the childfree:
7. Yadda yadda 2023 bingo card:
This is the most insane grouping of letters I’ve ever read https://t.co/ow6qu25eZd
— luna🌙🎃 (@lavenderobbers) June 16, 2023
8.WHAT DOES THIS MEAN:
9.A sage and wise point:
11.To be fair, anyone who has ever worked as a receptionist for more than a week would have dark energy:
14. He's out of line, but he's right:
vinegar is crazy man. the wario of water
— ● Will Wiesenfeld ● (@BATHSmusic) October 15, 2023
15.Ok, I will also be using this in my daily life:
16.Grubhub driver has pizazz:
17. And finally, this masterpiece of a sentence:
I either give too many fucks about something or I don't give any fucksI can't seem to find a middle ground for moderate fuck distribution
— Noah Kinsey (@thenoahkinsey) May 19, 2016
Want more brand new sentences? Check out last month's roundup!
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