Here in Blighty hot weather sends us a bit loopy. We lose all sense of decorum - first sign of sunshine and you can see what the entire nation’s been eating for breakfast.
We’re just not mentally prepared for this kind of pleasure. By the time we’ve had a day or two to remember how to act it’s all over for another year.
So don’t ask any questions, just enjoy while you can because the UK’s set to be hotter than Hawaii, Morocco and Monaco…for like, a day.
1. Milton Keynes is hotter than Barcelona today; do I actually need suncream though?
2. Wow, this sweaty nylon/spandex seamless-pants-plus-hungry-bum combo is not the stuff dreams are made of.
3. Ew, where have all these gross topless men on bikes come from?
4. Would it be too obvious if I skived work today?
5. Is it legit to eat this entire pack of ice lollies?
6. Is this a hangover or heatstroke?
7. FML why do I have to have a winter outfit for the office? Arctic aircon is completely unnecessary.
8. FML why is my office a Victorian building with zero ventilation?
9. Dear lord, how many humans have failed to discover deodorant?
10. What do you mean “there are there no tables available outside”?!