This Woman's Husband Asked Her To Be A Stay-At-Home Mom, So She Requested Half Of His Company
Depending on who you are, being a stay-at-home mom can bring fulfillment or dread, and a question of how you can sustain yourself if your marriage ever leads to divorce.
And that was exactly the case for redditor Status-Mention6793 (or Status for short), who sought advice on how to handle her husband's request that she stay home with their children. Here's the story: "My husband and I (both 35) have been married for six years, and we have two children together and one on the way. He said that he wanted me to be a housewife and stop working."
"I was very disturbed by that, but he explained that it was better for our family and children since he can afford a very good living."
"After a few weeks of thinking, I told him that I would agree but only if I get half of his company. He was surprised by this, but I explained further that the more I stay at home, the less chance I would have to find a well-paying job should we ever divorce because I would have less merits, while he would stay making more money each year."
"So I want half of the company. If we never divorce, which is the goal of all marriages, then it wouldn’t matter. But, should it end, it would be the price of me staying home and raising our children so he could be less worried and stressed out (his words, that he would be less anxious and stressed out if he knew they were with me rather than with strangers in daycare or nannies).
When I told my friends, they called me the asshole. My best friend was very angry and called me disgusting. So, I am taken aback a little."
After reading her post, I could not find a single comment from someone who thought she was being unreasonable.
"Not the asshole and you shouldn't bend on this," one anonymous user wrote. "You have as much a right to a secure financial future as he does. If he won't do this, he can't afford you, or he is looking to create a power imbalance that puts you at a disadvantage."
—Anonymous
"Not the asshole," user Hi_Im_Dadbot agreed. "He’s asking you to make a sacrifice for the sake of the company, so equity in the company is appropriate compensation for this."
"If you never get divorced, then no worries. If you do, then the extra attention he’s able to give to the business due to your taking on the domestic roles benefits both of you equally, as it should."
Emphasizing this point, other couples who experienced a similar situation shared how they chose to navigate it:
"I gave my wife 49%. I still wanted to run the business my way, but I understood her needs. Sold it 10 years ago and we're married 40 years this year," user daveymcman wrote.
"My ex wanted a housewife, and I stayed home, primarily because I had a medically fragile infant. He was so shocked by how the judge divided our property when he divorced me during his midlife crisis," an anonymous user shared.
"He got the business, and I got everything else, a home and fully funded retirement. Most women in senior divorces end up in poverty. Never give up your financial independence for a man."
Outside of those life experiences, a chunk of readers couldn't help but pause over the wife's friends who said she was wrong to ask for a stake in the company.
"Your friends sound awful," user DeLuca9 said. "I mean, let me write as I interpret your one friend who called you disgusting. They basically said you don’t deserve shit. Honestly don’t budge on this. You deserve just as much security as he does. Be cautious. Seek outside counsel. That’s a crazy sacrifice and you need new friends."
Another user, Ms_SkyNet, considered, "Maybe your best friend is jealous."
Regardless of whatever the case may be, user pitagrape aptly put, "Your friends can think whatever they want; what matters is what your husband thinks and does."
TRUE!
In the end, Status shared that she and her husband took advice directly out of the comment section and split the company 51/49.
What do you think of the situation? Let us know in the comments.
