Woman Wants Friend to Call Off Her Wedding Because She's Keeping a 'Massive' Secret from Her Fiancé

When the woman spoke up, her friend accused her of "butting in" on her relationship with her future husband, according to a post on Reddit

A woman has been accused by her friend of "butting in" on her relationship after suggesting that she call off her upcoming wedding because she is keeping a big secret from her fiancé.

The woman explained the dilemma in a recent account posted to Reddit's "Am I the A------?" forum on Sunday, Aug. 25, writing that her friend Daisy is set to marry her boyfriend of three years, Max, in a few weeks. She said she has been "super supportive" of the couple's marriage plans — "until recently," when she learned a surprising piece of news from Daisy at her bachelorette party.

The bride-to-be and her close friends gathered for a small, pre-wedding celebration at a vineyard, and during dinner Daisy "dropped the bomb."

"[Daisy] made a big show of pouring everyone a glass of the house red except for herself, and took a huge sip of her water," the Reddit poster recounted. "She was smiling at all of us as if we were already in on the joke, but we weren’t. But then, slowly, realization dawned and she confirmed: she is pregnant. 2 months pregnant, to be exact."

Related: Pregnant Wedding Guest Scolded by Bride for Bringing Her Own Food to the Reception: 'Rude'

The friends were quick to congratulate Daisy, but then "someone made one of those jokes about them having to get married just cause she’s pregnant and she got all mischievous again," the poster wrote.

"She then revealed that Max doesn’t know and that it was going to be a surprise," the user continued. "The reaction to this was mostly positive, which dumbfounded me."

The woman went on to explain that while Daisy and Max have always been open with each other about their desire to have kids, she felt uncomfortable with Daisy's decision to not tell her fiancé about her pregnancy until after the wedding.

"I don’t think you should marry someone when you’re keeping something that massive secret," she wrote.

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The day after the bachelorette party, the poster decided to share her opinion with Daisy — but it was not well-received. "I told [Daisy] what I thought, and that I was just trying to look out for her and that if it was the other way around I would want her to do the same for me," the poster recalled. "She got really quiet while I was talking and afterwards told me that she didn’t appreciate me ‘butting in’ on their marriage and that it was her decision."

She continued: "I pointed out that it shouldn’t be just ‘her decision’ that she was majorly affecting Max's life too without even including him in the conversation and that she shouldn't go through with the wedding if she was insistent on keeping him in the dark. This pissed her off, and she told me to leave and not contact her."

It seems Daisy spoke to some other friends about the disagreement, and many of them have taken the side of the pregnant bride. "[They] are calling me an a------ for ‘ruining what’s supposed to be the most exciting time’ in Daisy’s life, and 'what gives me the right', etc.," the user wrote.

Now, the woman is worried that she may have "overstepped" and even "ruined" her friendship with Daisy over her stance about keeping the pregnancy a secret from Max. She asked her fellow Redditors to weigh in on the drama.

Related: Bride Angry After Her Pregnant Dressmaker Friend Says She Can't Make Wedding Gown Because Ceremony Is Near Due Date

The majority of commenters told the poster that she was indeed in the wrong in this situation. "You can express to her that you think Max should be told before, but that is as far as friendship can bend. To tell her to call off the wedding is way, way, way out of bounds. Daisy is right," one person wrote.

Another person told the poster: "Not your relationship, not your business. It's very common for people in a relationship to discuss, in detail, plans to have children including when and how. So, Daisy knows better than you if Max will be okay with her surprise. Your opinion is just that — your opinion — and it's a huge overstep to tell her to call off her wedding."

Someone else chimed in, "It's not like she's 'tricking him into marrying her' with a pregnancy and it's not like he doesn't want children, so she's waiting until after they're married to tell him. There's no reason for them not to marry just because she hadn't yet told him what she thinks will be a pleasant surprise for him."

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Several commenters even suggested that the poster was trying to create a problem where there isn't one.

"Why are you trying to create an issue? They're getting married and you know that they want kids together anyway," one person argued, adding, "You sound like you just wanted to stir some s--- up for no reason."

Another person commented: "Your lack of faith in your best friend’s judgment and assumption that yours is better is entitlement in the worst way. It would be one thing if he didn’t want kids, but you know he does. So she wants to surprise him, to make the happiest day of his life all the happier."

They continued, "Why step on that? Why second guess it? I don’t blame her for being upset with you."

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