Woman Snaps at Mother-in-Law After She Shames Her for Sending Toddler to Daycare

One woman is seeking advice from the Reddit community after reaching her breaking point with her mother-in-law’s unsolicited advice. The frustrated mom has been preparing to send her 18-month-old son to daycare so she can return to work.

“My mother-in-law keeps insisting that 18 months is too young for daycare,” the woman writes in a Reddit post. Despite the woman’s careful planning and research into a reputable daycare with a good teacher-to-child ratio, her mother-in-law continues to express disapproval over the decision.

After nearly two years at home with her son, the poster is ready to be back in the office. “I love my son, but I don’t think I can stay home with him any longer,” she writes. “I miss my professional life, and I need to get back on track with my career. On top of that, I don’t want my husband to carry the financial burden anymore.”

The situation is particularly frustrating for the poster because her mother-in-law offers no alternative solutions beyond her critique. “She can’t watch my son, feed him, or even change his diaper,” she notes.

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To add to the complexity of the situation, the mother-in-law has been inconsistent in her opinions. When her sister-in-law gave birth, she stayed home for three years with her child, but the mother-in-law judged that choice as well.

“My mother-in-law complained that her son had to work too hard as the sole provider,” she writes. “Now that we’re doing something different, she’s complaining again—this time that our son is ‘so poor’ because he’s going to daycare ‘so early.’”

When asked yet again if she felt bad about sending her son to daycare, the mom snapped back, at the mother-in-law, saying, “I don’t think it’s necessary to have an opinion on every single thing. Especially when A) it’s none of your business, and B) you’re offering no solutions.” This confrontation, however, caused tension in the family.

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While the woman’s husband didn’t disagree with her stance, he was unhappy with her approach. His strategy has always been to “listen, nod, and ignore” his mother’s comments, she writes, believing that any pushback only feeds into her desire for drama.

Though she acknowledges her husband’s perspective, the poster expresses her own frustration with constantly hearing criticism and not pushing back. “I think that saying nothing back to her sends a message that it’s okay for her to give us unsolicited advice,” the poster notes. 

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The post has since left Reddit users divided on which party they side with. One user writes, “I think you are missing out on loads of fun with your kids. I agree with her.”

Another disagrees, writing, “Honestly, it sounds like you’ve got everything under control with your little one and are making thoughtful, responsible choices. If your MIL isn’t offering to help out or provide any realistic alternatives, then her commentary is just noise. You’re absolutely justified in setting boundaries.”

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