Solo traveler defended after refusing woman’s request to switch plane seats to be next to her husband
A solo traveler has been defended online over her decision to deny a woman’s request to swap seats on the plane.
The traveler shared her experience in a recent post in a Reddit forum about United Airlines. She explained that they took a red-eye flight from Dulles International Airport in Virginia to London Heathrow in the UK.
They were “very pleased” with their window seat in the economy plus section of the plane. However, she later heard someone say “it’s that person over there,” knowing “immediately” that stranger was talking about her.
“She asks me ‘Are you traveling alone? Do you have family with you?’” the Reddit user wrote. “Why is that any of your business? But I stumbled over my words, saying yes I’m traveling alone.”
“Then she proceeded to ask if I could switch seats with her husband who was in the middle and first row in economy plus so there is no underseat storage,” she continued.
The user said she declined the request as she’d purchased her seat and had arranged for a special meal due to her allergies.
However, the fellow traveler wasn’t pleased by this response.
“She turned to her husband on the other side of the aisle and scoffs aggressively, ‘This girl won’t switch because she paid for her seat,’” she added. “I’m left sitting red in the face and so uncomfortable.”
She explained that while she “doesn’t like to inconvenience people” and felt bad for the woman, she didn’t know why the couple didn’t buy seats next to each other.
The Reddit post has quickly gained traction with more than 3,700 upvotes. In the comments, multiple people defended the solo traveler’s decision to keep her seat, especially after being asked to swap to a middle seat with less room.
“Seriously, if you’re going to ask someone to move, it needs to be to a better seat,” one wrote while another agreed: “Someone wanted you to switch from a window to a middle? It has to be like for like to even have the gall to ask.”
“I’ve declined dozens of seat swap requests and have never felt bad at all. It’s your seat,” a third wrote.
Other people criticized the woman’s reaction when the solo traveler said no to trading seats.
“They mistakenly thought your well-behaved manners meant you were an easy target for them. Cheers to you for slamming their assumptions into the floor. Ignore the ignorance of others,” one wrote.
“Why are you red in the face? Why are you uncomfortable?” another wrote. “They were unreasonable. As an adult, you are allowed to respond to someone being unreasonable by being annoyed and irritated. To their face. They aren’t your friends. They are strangers looking to take advantage of you.”
Speaking to The Independent in 2023, Diane Gottsman, a national etiquette expert and founder of The Protocol School of Texas, said that there is only one acceptable scenario where a traveler may ask a fellow passenger to switch.
The acceptable situation is when a parent or guardian found “there is no possible way” through pre-planning that they could have been seated next to their young child. At this point, “of course, it’s understandable” to ask a fellow passenger to swap.
However, Gottsman noted that, even in a case involving a young child, “it’s always best to ask a ticket agent or someone from the travel company if there is a possibility of changing or switching seats before you board the plane or train,” as “asking a fellow passenger puts the person you are asking in an awkward position” and relies on their “goodwill.”
