What the sigma are Generation Alpha talking about?
Not so long ago, I studied sociocultural linguistics and learned how language changes over time and is used to create communities. However, while I was taught to welcome all forms of verbal communication without judgement, nothing could prepare me for the day my 12-year-old daughter first called me ‘bruv’. What the?!
Trying to decipher what Generation Alpha (born since 2010) are saying is sending well-meaning parents 'lowkey delulu' [slightly delusional]. But when September comes around it’s time to send them back to the social battlefield of secondary school and, as a parent, you have no option but to attempt to re-engage.
No wonder us parents get the 'skibidis' [generally bad feeling] when we try to talk to our kids and have to get them to translate every other word. When language becomes another barrier between our world and theirs, it can’t be a good thing. I remember my Dad bravely referred to my new tight perm as "rad" sometime in the eighties, and I only stopped cringing when I turned 30. So, do your bit to understand the words - but proceed with extreme caution if you’re tempted to actually use them...
Decoding Generation Alpha
To help get you through the next term, here’s a handy glossary of Gen Alpha phrases to translate what your kids are really saying.
Cap
Cap means lies, or false. Originally African American slang, the etymology is disputed but it may have evolved from “cap” meaning “top” in terms of one upmanship. “To cap” at one time meant to brag, rather than just to lie. The opposite of cap is “fax”, as in “facts”.
Fanum Tax
Fanum is a YouTuber with 1.7m subscribers and a penchant for pinching food from friends during his live streams. Taking a chip from someone else’s plate, or a sneaky bite from someone else’s sandwich, is known as a “fanum tax.”
Mewing
Not the sound a kitten makes. In Gen Alpha world, mewing isn’t even a word, it’s an action (a bit like “chinny reckon” from the eighties, if you remember that, where a chin stroke meant someone was lying). Mewing is a facial exercise involving putting your tongue up on the roof of your mouth, with the intended effect of appearing to strengthen the jawline. It also makes it impossible to talk, so when Alphas stroke their jawline with their finger it means, “I can’t talk, I’m mewing” or even just “go away”.
Relatable
“Relatable” can be an expression of solidarity, recognition or simple agreement. But English teachers are discreetly lamenting the weaponisation of “relatability” as a way for students to refuse to study books that aren’t set in the 21st century. As in, “I can’t relate to Shakespeare - he doesn’t reflect my lived experience.” The vibe is that Shakespeare has like, negative rizz.
Rizz
Social capital, specifically relating to sex appeal. Rizz is derived from “charisma” so you might say, “That guy has infinite rizz.” Year 9 boys with the most rizz are likely to be in a WhatsApp group called, unironically, “Menkind”. Kids with low rizz are “irrelevant.” Ouch.
Skibidi Toilet
Russian footballer Aleksei Gerasimov made a YouTube video series in February 2023 featuring toilets from which emerge singing human heads. Lovely. Their song, an unlicensed mash up of a track by American rapper Timbaland (nothing to do with the boots) and Bulgarian artist Biser King, rang out across primary school playgrounds throughout last year, and sparked a whole internet subculture of Skibidi spin off memes and merchandise. There is talk (shudder) of a Skibidi movie in the pipeline.
Sigma
Tricky one, this. Sigma can mean a popular, powerful boy who keeps himself to himself. Not an “alpha male”, who is the top of social hierarchy but tends to run with the crowd. “What the Sigma” doesn’t really mean anything - it originates from a Spongebob Squarepants meme. Go figure?
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