Santa tracker: NORAD and Google show Santa Claus entering US on Christmas Eve journey after stopping off in Britain at midnight
He's made his list, he's checked it twice, he already knows who's naughty and nice. Santa Claus is coming to town – and you can follow him every snow-crunching step of the way.
The boffins at Norad (the North American Aerospace Defense Command) kindly dedicate December 24th to tracking Father Christmas as he darts from chimney to chimney, country to country, and continent to continent, delivering gifts while voraciously consuming sweetmeats.
Their service began by happenstance in 1955, when a Sears ad in a local paper offering the chance to speak to Santa mistakenly printed the top secret phone number of Conad – Norad’s predecessor. US Air Force Col. Harry Shoup took the first call from a young boy wanting to talk to Santa in good humour, and so a Christmas tradition was born.
Now, every year, thousands of volunteers staff telephones and computers to answer calls and e-mails from children (and adults) around the world. As of 2007, search engine Google has also provided an online tracker, in partnership with Norad.
Scroll down to find out exactly where Father Christmas is at the moment. And keep your fingers crossed that when he arrives at your house, he'll find your name on the good side of that list ...
And goodbye from me...
Well, that's all from me. You can still follow Santa live as he makes his away across the US and Mexico - having delivered 6 billion gifts and counting. I hope you haven't been disappointed. And if you have...well, just get what you really want in the Boxing Day sales - details of which can be found here.
Merry Christmas!
'I was many things at Christmas, but grateful wasn’t one of them.'
As the time comes for kids to open their presents, eliciting unrestrained joy or slightly more restrained disappointment, Cathy Bussey looks at how Christmas can be the most hypocritical time of year for parents.
As parents, we are all guilty from time to time of rose-tinting our childhoods. And never is the tint heavier than at Christmas.
We have so much emotion invested in this time of year – emotion borne from a mix of festive stress, nostalgia, and expectations of perfection. We want the day to live up to everything we see in the movies, and that means happy, smiling, grateful, grounded kids. It's easy to forget that they're only children, just like we were.
Michelle Obama is one of Norad's little elfs
For most people, a Christmas Eve phone call with the first lady of the United States is an unexpected surprise. But Austin was holding out for someone else.
"I want to hear Santa talk," said Austin, one of a handful of kids who called the NORAD Tracks Santa programme on Saturday and found Michelle Obama on the other end of the line.
Santa couldn't get to the phone, the first lady patiently explained, "because he's delivering all the gifts" - 5.7 billion as of now.
There was a bittersweet note this year as the first lady carried out her annual Christmas ritual for the final time, taking calls from kids who wanted to know exactly how much progress Santa had made on his journey. It'll be up to the next first lady, Melania Trump, to decide next year whether to continue the tradition.
"I'm detecting something on the radar screen. Yes, it's Santa! -The First Lady answering the annual @NoradSanta call pic.twitter.com/oIYhhrnn59
— The First Lady (@FLOTUS) December 25, 2016
But Austin had another concern in mind: Would Santa know where to go?
"I'm going to move to another house," said Austin, joined by three other kids in North Carolina.
No matter, Mrs. Obama replied.
"He's going to be able to find you no matter where you go," she said, according to a transcript released by the White House. "That's the special thing about Santa."
The first lady spent roughly a half-hour taking calls before joining her husband, daughters Sasha and Malia and family friends.
Festive fracas
If you're in the UK reading this, enjoy the nocturnal peace while you can. For Christmas is a time of joy and merriment - and quite often arguments. From rows over board games to political disagreements, Alan Tyers looks at the common sources of strife in home around the country on Christmas Day - one of them being about whether to watch the Queen's Speech.
A chance to watch a beloved national figurehead console the nation with a few gently inspiring words? Or a furious battleground involving the rival attractions of video games, heavyweight speedball from Guatemala live on Sky Sports 27, Bond, sleeping, and some sort of right-on eco-nonsense on Channel 4? The question: are similar arguments happening at Sandringham right now?
White House fly-by
Santa has just buzzed the White House - and is lucky he wasn't shot down by secret service on the roof.
#Santa was just seen passing through Washington D.C. by #NORADTracksSanta systems!! https://t.co/SX9o01aKj6
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 25, 2016
Favourite Christmas Days?
NORAD has been asking what your favourite Christmas memory is?
Favorite Christmas Memory...GO! @NoradSanta
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 25, 2016
Novelist and Very Clever Man Will Self has written in the Telegraph about his most memorable Christmas Days.
I came to adulthood feeling pretty alienated from the socialised form of Christmas, and although I tried to do my best for my four children as they were growing up, I’m pretty certain I failed.
That doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy Christmas – but what I like most is going against its grain: being lean rather than bloated, alone rather than in company, outside and chillily active rather than inside and cosily somnolent – or preferably somewhere so hot the natives have never even countenanced the possibility of a snowy December 25.
Read the full article here.
Needless to say, I'm having my favourite Christmas Day right now.
Where is now?
Meanwhile, Santa has been skirting America's eastern seaboard.
#NORADTracksSanta has reports from Cape Cod AFS that they are currently tracking #Santa over the Atlantic! https://t.co/NrhFXKn6oX
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 25, 2016
He is currently over Brazil's Amazon rainforest. Who's have guessed that Santa went to Amazon to buy presents too.
From Scotland to Sydney
Santa was in Australia long ago ... and now the presents have been opened, it's time for (mostly) expats to hit Bondi Beach, where temperatures are in the mid 20s.
When Xi met Santa...
As Santa heads to the US later, perhaps he'll have a meeting with president-elect Donald Trump. After all, Santa is no stranger to hobnobbing with world leaders - remember that time he met China's then future president Xi Jinping in Finland?
Lest it be forgotten pic.twitter.com/Fdc3v90L7I
— Peter Dahlin (@Peterinexile) December 25, 2016
Santa drops in on Rio
Here's a rather large reminder what Christmas is meant to be about.
RIO! #NORADTracksSanta just spotted #Santa in Rio de Janeiro!! https://t.co/YjzAPK0qpb
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 25, 2016
But what about the wall?!
As Santa makes his way up South America, there's one issue worrying some people.
My 4 year old asked me if Santa will be able to fly over Donald Trump's wall. What a world... #ImStillWithHer
— Jessica Tully (@JessTullyEsq) December 12, 2016
Crossed the Atlantic
Santa has fairly notched up the air miles tonight. He's now crossed the Atlantic and has been stopping off at places along Brazil's coast.
He's now heading to Hawaii - or the Sandwich Islands, as NORAD likes to call them.
Santa's not too hungry right now, but he's still making his way to the Sandwich Islands! @NoradSanta
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 25, 2016
So where did he visit?
Everywhere, obviously. But there have been confirmed sightings reported in London, Exeter, Cardiff, Cambridge, Bakewell (he must like the tarts there), Edinburgh and Belfast.
And so it was, at the midnight hour, Santa came and then went. Merry Christmas, one and all!
And here was the moment
Anyone from England tracking with us?! #NORADTracksSanta is tracking him in your neighborhood! https://t.co/9OfxVPOeSx
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 24, 2016
London looking pretty good...though were there many good boys in the House of Commons getting presents this year?
BREAKING: Santa has touched down in the UK!
That's right people, he was a little ahead of schedule but Santa has just visited London.
Did you see him?
Does Santa support Brighton?
Only about another hour to go before Santa touches down in the UK. Meanwhile, reports are emerging that Santa was seen in Sydney ... and that he supports Brighton.
The white-bearded one was seen in front of the Harbour Bridge wearing the famous blue-and-white of the Seagulls. It should be noted that the man in the photo has yet to be confirmed as Santa.
Merry Christmas @OfficialBHAFC fans around the globe, have a great day. ☃��@NorthStandChat@wearebrightonpic.twitter.com/Uy0BGMKsgN
— Seagulls Downunder (@OfficialSDU) December 24, 2016
Did you know...
A little Christmas trivia for you now - a little stocking filler which may come in handy at a pub quiz.
How heavy does Santa's sleigh get?
Q. What's the gross weight of Santa's sleigh, fully loaded?
A. Zero--he reconstitutes the toys using the milk you leave for him.— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 24, 2016
Not quite true, because Santa, when fully loaded with whisky and mince pies, weighs a tonne.
Bonjour Paris!
Santa has just flown past the Eiffel Tower in Paris like Maverick buzzed the tower in Top Gun. Rudolph can be my wingman anytime.
#Santa was just spotted circling the iconic Eiffel Tower in Paris!! #NORADTracksSantahttps://t.co/UUCwgVGzpi
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 24, 2016
On a more serious note...
Just as Santa was flying over the Vatican earlier, the Pope was addressing a 10,000-strong crowd.
Pope Francis urged the world's 1.2 billion Catholics to feel compassion for children, notably victims of war, migration and homelessness in his Christmas Eve mass but also those "not allowed to be born".
The pontiff urged worshippers to celebrate "authentically", by acknowledging "the fragile simplicity of a small newborn" and "the tender affection of the swaddling clothes".
"Let us allow the child in the manger to challenge us, but let us also allow ourselves to be challenged by the children of today's world," he said, speaking in St. Peter's Square.
Unsurprisingly he didn't mention Santa - and in an echo of his well-established criticisms of materialism, Francis also urged the faithful to avoid indifference, "when Christmas becomes a feast where the protagonists are ourselves, rather than Jesus".
How quickly does he have to deliver presents?
He's delivered 3.3 billion presents so far and it's going up very quickly indeed.
Flying across Europe
Santa has flown through Italy, Germany and is now in Slovakia. Soon he'll be in Poland. Which all begs the question, is this what some Brexiteers meant when they warned about open borders?
#NORADTracksSanta is currently monitoring #Santa flying towards Rome!! https://t.co/ihMmgWU9MY
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 24, 2016
Alta, Norway will feel almost like North Pole home to Santa when he gets there in a few minutes! #NORADTracksSantapic.twitter.com/4LYdWTm90K
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 24, 2016
How to actually enjoy Christmas
For some (weird) people, Christmas loses its shine when you become an adult. So, much like Charles Dickens reminded people of the joys of Christmas with A Christmas Carol, the Telegraph has some handy tips on how to put the crack back into your cracker, so to speak...
Read more here. (And yes, drink may be one of them. But always responsibly).
Ho, ho, and indeed, ho
Evening all! If you haven't had time to get your presents (and if you're not relying only on Santa's offerings), then I'm sure there's a 24 hour petrol station that will help you out. Nothing says 'Merry Christmas' more than some windscreen washer fluid and a stale sandwich.
Meanwhile, as Santa touches down in Dubrovnik, Norad may have another little helper manning its lines soon - Michelle Obama.
Rumor has it FLOTUS will be taking some calls again this year! #NORADTracksSanta
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 24, 2016
Happy Christmas from this elf
That's all from me. Chris Graham is taking over the reins as Santa heads for Port-Gentil, Gabon, shortly after delivering his three billionth present. With favourable sleigh winds he'll be in the UK in about three hours.
Special One sees Santa's sleigh
An early sighting of Santa's sleigh has been reported by Mr Jose Mourinho of Manchester...
When someone tells you Santa isn't real but you've just seen his sleigh fly over your house. pic.twitter.com/6qXkIsBxyb
— Man Utd Videos ⚽️�� (@ManUtdVines) December 24, 2016
Norad or Google?
There is still some disagreement between the boffins at Norad and Google (which is also tracking Santa ) over where he is.
Norad currently has him leaving Juba, South Sudan, while Google has him much further north, somewhere in Romania.
It may be the speed of Santa's reindeer that is confusing things.
With apologies to Google we will continue to go with Norad's sightings.
Santa swings by the Parthenon
He's obviously in a hurry to get the presents delivered but Santa gets to do some great sight-seeing along the way.
he's been spotted doing a quick sleigh-by of the Parthenon
#NORADTracksSanta has spotted #Santa flying through beautiful Athens!! https://t.co/8FMjoX6Cjg
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 24, 2016
Lights on in Colombo
Sri Lanka's record-breaking Christmas tree now has its lights on now
Sri Lanka claims world’s tallest artificial Christmas tree: Sri Lanka has unveiled a towering Christmas tree,… https://t.co/tfJZtIiDcvpic.twitter.com/Ymx4cZ5Tus
— Politics Edmonton (@POLSEdmonton) December 24, 2016
Santa briefing with jet pilots
Santa met a few days ago with US jet pilots to discuss the best route through crowded North American airspace.
Prebrief between Santa and one of NORAD's jet pilots completed a few days ago-- #NORADTracksSantapic.twitter.com/76J0z2VVgY
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 24, 2016
Six hours to go
On his current timeline Santa is six hours from the UK.
While you're waiting here's all you need to know about the new trend for Christmas Eve boxes
World's last wild frankincense forests are under threat
Worrying news reaches us from the Cal Madow mountains in Somaliland. This from the Associated Press:
Frankincense, along with gold and myrrh, was brought by the Three Kings as gifts in the Gospel account of the birth of Jesus.
But now these last intact wild frankincense forests on Earth are under threat as prices have shot up in recent years with the global appetite for essential oils. Overharvesting has led to the trees dying off faster than they can replenish, putting the ancient resin trade at risk.
Frankincense is something that is literally given by God to humanity, so if we don't preserve it, if we don't take care of it, if we don't look after it, we will lose that," said Shukri Ismail, Somaliland's minister of environment and rural development.
The nine ages of Christmas
How you feel about Christmas really depends on how old you are.
See which of the Nine Ages of Christmas you're in
Santa spotted on video near the Kremlin
#Santa is on his way through Moscow!! #NORADTracksSantahttps://t.co/KSdxmXLq15
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 24, 2016
Meet the supersonic jet pilots helping Santa
Santa's sleigh is fast so these fighter jet pilots will be helping to track him through North American airspace
Canadian #NORAD Region names #Santa’s escort #pilots and trackers: https://t.co/eHfumkZZexpic.twitter.com/wGjmK8gIP5
— Skies Magazine (@SkiesMag) December 14, 2016
Santa's best board games
The sleigh will have a lot of these in it this Christmas.
Here is our list of the best board games of 2016
Two billionth present delivered
You may think if you live off the beaten track that Santa might forget about you, or not have time to drop in this year.
Fear not, Santa goes everywhere.
He delivered his two millionth present of the night in Novaya Zemlya, Russia.
Santa is now on his way to Ashgabat in Turkmenistan.
World record Christmas tree
In Sri Lanka Santa will see the world's tallest artificial Christmas tree.
The world record breaking tree in Colombo is 57 metres (187 feet) tall.
It has 600,000 coloured LED bulbs along with a six-metre high Santa and a 12-metre long sleigh.
Cricket legend Arjuna Ranatunga initiated plans to build the tree. It took the record from one in China last year.
There was some opposition from the Catholic church which said the money would be better spent on charity.
That led to a delay building it and the tree was pruned a bit.
The lights are due to go on hours from now.
Mirroring religious #harmony in #SriLanka .
#worlds#Tallest#Christmas tree. Is ready to be lit up pic.twitter.com/aGj0hAU7pZ— Vajira Sumedha (@vajirasumeda) December 24, 2016
Heading for Sri Lanka
Santa is speeding along. He's just made a stop in Bishkek, Kyrgyzstan.
Nest up is Colombo, Sri Lanka where it's a balmy 76F. He might need to take off his coat.
More than 1.8 million presents delivered now.
The Norad view
Here's what Norad is seeing at their control centre. Norad sees everything.
Santa is moving along quite well. Look at all those gifts already delivered. pic.twitter.com/coWUj8tKBE
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 24, 2016
Trump-themed Christmas gifts
Like Santa the US-President-elect seems to be everywhere you look in the US this Christmas.
You can buy Trump-themed soap, a Trump-shaped cookie-cutter, and wrap everything in Trump wrapping paper.
Here's some of the Trump-themed festive gifts.
This elf is heading home...
And that's it from me, time to hand you over to Nick Allen for more Santa watching.
This sounds familiar...
Santa's just passed Christmas Island - named so after Captain William Mynors of the Royal Mary, an English East India Company vessel, named the island when he sailed past it on Christmas Day, in 1643.
Santa is heading for Christmas Island!
— Lester French (@lesfrench) December 24, 2016
Borneo, Santa's on his way
He's been to Japan and China, and now he's on his way to Borneo - currently minutes away from Brunei.
Have you spotted Santa using Norad's tracker? Let us know!
Should Santa trade in the sleigh?
He's in China right now, and most people would say Santa makes pretty good time - but could he be faster?
We've put together a list of cars Santa should consider to speed up his journey - and we've added some tips for anyone travelling over the Christmas period, because we're just that nice. (Hint, hint, Santa)
11 hours to go
Pass the time waiting for Santa to arrive in the UK by trying your hand at our fiendishly tough Christmas quiz. The winner gets to call themselves Christmas King (or Queen) for the rest of the year....
Your turn, Australia
With nearly 800,000 presents delivered, Santa is currently flying over Australia - but something is a little off here. Australia's version of Santa Claus is a little different to our own. He's often depicted using kangaroos to pull his sleigh rather than reindeer.
Maybe it's time to give Rudolph a break and recruit some new helpers, Santa? At least while he's in Oz...
What do you leave out for Santa?
Mince pies? A glass of whisky? Cookies? Carrots?
The debate rages on Twitter with people from all over revealing the small treats they leave out for Santa to say thank you for the gifts and give him a boost of energy for the journey.
Ooo yummmm!!! Cookies I wish I was Santa to eat all of them. What kind of cookies are you putting out for Santa comment Down below����!!������ pic.twitter.com/VeMw5WvAHO
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 24, 2016
What do you leave out for him? Let us know...
Half a million gifts delivered
Just minutes from reaching the Kuril Islands, Santa has delivered 500,000 presents to well behaved children across the globe.
You're probably not as efficient as Santa (he has been doing it for a while after all - since around 300 A.D., if you want to technical) when it comes to picking out gifts for your loved ones, so don't forget to take a peek at our last minute gift guide for anyone you might have forgotten.
A message from Santa
Christmas Eve is the busiest day of the year for Santa, yet he's been kind enough to take some time out of his hectic schedule to relay a message to us all...
Fiji, you're next!
Fiji, put out the mince pies and whisky because Santa is on his way...
In Fiji, Christmas and the New Year is celebrated a little differently than in other countries across the world - it's a time for cosy family gatherings and musical events, rather than flashy decorations and fireworks.
And Fiji isn't the only country with its own festive traditions. In Japan it's not turkey you'll find on the dinner table on Christmas Day, but KFC instead.
Feeling very Japanese. Just ordered my first KFC Holiday special haha. Booked it for Christmas Day. #japan#Tokyopic.twitter.com/bDXneGNQbR
— Adam Walsh (@adamfwalsh) December 11, 2016
This is because KFC became popular among festive foreigners in Japan who couldn't find a whole chicken or turkey elsewhere. The fast-food chain seized upon the trend with a highly successful marketing campaign in the 1970s, and now a trip to KFC is considered a Christmas tradition.
Keep your eyes peeled Antarctica
With over 300,000 gifts delivered so far, Santa Claus has just touched down in New Zealand.
Kids are already tracking Santa's progress on @NoradSanta. Timing was good; he's just visited Great Grandad & family in New Zealand! pic.twitter.com/z7ykHeXCtK
— Brett Buchanan (@BrettBuch) December 24, 2016
Next on the checklist is Antarctica, where Christmas falls in the summer.
Time for a new Telegraph elf
Righto, that's me done for the morning. Time to hand you over to Saffron Alexander.
Merry Santa tracking one and all!
An Australian welcome awaits
Santa makes 640 million stops on Christmas Eve – which also means he eats 640 mince pies.
The Telegraph's Chris Graham has made sure Santa receives his traditional welcome when he reaches Australia. Looks like he'll be washing down his sweetmeat with a nice drop of whisky – the true golden nectar.
What happened to the rest of the bottle, Chris?
My wee girl is learning quickly. She's only a couple weeks old, but she already knows to leave whisky and mince pie for Santa... #Christmaspic.twitter.com/fkpfrNVlgj
— Chris Graham (@cjgraham82) December 24, 2016
Norad's army of elves
As Santa makes his merry way south towards New Zealand and Australia, a word about the men and women who are tracking his progress.
The Norad call centre is staffed with 1,500 volunteers, who answer calls and e-mails from children (and adults) about the whereabouts of Santa. The telephone is expected to ring 140,000 times over the next 24 hours or so, while the Santa Tracker inbox will register over 10,000 emails.
Wherever you're reading this from, you can speak to one of the volunteers by calling 1-877-44-66723 (or 1-877-HI-NORAD if you're that way inclined) or emailing noradtrackssanta@outlook.com.
We are live at the NORAD Tracks Santa Operations Center. Start calling in now. #NORADTracksSantapic.twitter.com/tpeQDNS0Zj
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 24, 2016
Would the real Santa Claus please stand up?
And he's off ... again.
At 11am GMT, Norad announced that they had picked up Santa travelling across the North Pole. Their video tracker now shows him making his way across the same eastern Russian coast the Google think he traversed over an hour ago.
#NORADTracksSanta location update! #NORAD has just picked up #Santa taking off from the North Pole!!! https://t.co/DY4f9ySSsy
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 24, 2016
Awkward. Who are we to believe? A search engine that answers two trillion enquiries for information annually, or a North American military institution that keeps the skies safe over the United States and Canada?
Sorry Google, but I'm going with Norad. They've got nukes.
#NORADTracksSanta location update! DSP Satellite sensors have picked up heat the signatures of Rudolphs red nose!!https://t.co/zD0FMBZpz7
— NORAD Santa (@NoradSanta) December 24, 2016
Are you REALLY Santa Claus?
Controversy brewing in the Santa tracking world.
According to Norad, the big man is still preparing for his journey – as you can see by clicking play on the video at the top of this article.
However, Google's tracker has Santa and his sleigh skirting the edge of Russia. They reckon he's already dropped off an impressive 700,000 presents. (There's a lot of well behaved children in eastern Russia, apparently. Good to know.)
Before we cry foul and start submitting FOI requests, it's worth noting that the same happened last year, when it took Norad's live stream about an hour to catch up. Given that the US air defense base marries its Santa tracking duties with matters of national security, I think we can forgive their tardiness.
BREAKING
Sources at Google suggests the sleigh launch was successful and Santa is now zooming across the Arctic ocean en route to Russia.
Traffic chaos hits British Christmas getaway
With around five minutes to go until Santa's scheduled departure, he'll be feeling pretty chuffed that he decided to stick with his trusty old sleigh rather than upgrade to a more conventional mode of transport.
Britain's motorways are already feeling the brunt of the great Christmas getaway. Motorists travelling on the M1 are facing long delays after a major accident forced traffic authorities to close junctions 13 - 12 southbound.
To find out more about the traffic chaos – and envy Santa's free access to airspace – read our report, here.
Is it illegal to be drunk in charge of a reindeer-drawn sleigh?
Norad inform us that Santa has completed his reindeer harnessing protocol and the sleigh is now positioned on the runway.
And it's a good job that he'll be taking to the skies, because that sleigh would attract the attention of the world's traffic cops were it to navigate its journey on the ground. According to some crack investigation work by Telegraph Cars' Ed Wiseman, anyone who operates an animal-drawn moving vehicle on Britain's roads is subject to arcane legislation:
Driving your sleigh “furiously” could land you in a special type of Victorian trouble under the Town Police Clauses Act 1847. It’s a vague term, but if you’re going faster than the conditions allow or are causing a nuisance to passers by, you may be in contravention of this law. A reindeer has a maximum speed of between 10mph and 15mph, however, which won’t set off any speed cameras.
We’ve previously calculated that Father Christmas needs to travel at approximately 1,800 miles per second to complete his rounds on Christmas Eve. At this speed, your greatest worry is your relativistic increase of mass rather than speeding tickets.
And then there's the alcohol issue. As we all know, Santa is partial to a drop of sherry – but just one glass is likely to put him close to the drink drive limit. Here's Ed again:
Being drunk while in control of a group of large animals is inadvisable as well as illegal. Several pieces of legislation are in place, some drafted centuries ago, that outlaw drunkenness at the reins. Prosecutions under the 1872 Licensing Act, for example, still do occur when people ride horses, drive cattle, or attempt to use a horse and carriage while under the influence of alcohol.
Statesman Santa
Nice touch, this.
Santa's gathered his elves in the village square at Santa Co HQ to deliver a Yuletide speech.
"Without you, I'm nothing," he is reported as saying. "You are the hive to my queen bee, the civil servants to my PM, the Ed Sheeran to my X Factor single. Yes, I get the publicity, but the glory belongs to you. My loyal friends, once again, I thank you from the bottom of my heart."
Wiping away an elfish tear, our source said: "He's a good boss really. He works us hard, but it's because he has the expectations of the world's children on his shoulders. We wouldn't trade him for anyone else."
BREAKING
Reports are coming in that the last gift has been wrapped in the Elf House. According to a source close to the scene, a cheer erupted on the shop floor as the last present rolled off the production line.
"We're so happy it's over," said one elf, who asked not to be named. "By this point, none of us gives a figgy pudding about Christmas – we just want to have a good sleep while the boss is out of town before starting work on next year's haul."
When is he due to leave?
According to the Google Santa tracker, run in conjunction with Norad, the big man will take flight at 10am GMT.
That gives him just under two hours to finish that checklist.
The wait is almost over
He's had 364 days to prepare for this moment – but it seems Santa is just as prone to last minute panics as the rest of us.
According to Norad, he's currently to be found in the North Pole's Elf House, checking that his army of benevolent workers are putting the finishing touches the last presents.
Leaving it a bit later, Santa Co?
Santa's journey in numbers
He will travel an estimated 510,000,000km on Christmas Eve - moving at a staggering 10,703,437.5km/hr, or about 1,800 miles per second.
Santa needs to visit 390,000 homes per minute - or 6,424 per second. Assuming there are three children per household, that's 233,000,000 stops for Santa and his sleigh (before we rule out the naughty kids).
With all the sherry and mince pies on offer, he will consume around 71,764,000,000 calories in total. That's 71,763,997,500 more than his recommended daily intake – or the equivalent of eating 1,010,760,528 too many digestive biscuits.
Godspeed, big fella.