19 Big Life Mistakes And Missed Opportunities That People Made And Now Regret
Living with regrets is truly a very universal human experience — one that teaches us valuable lessons and often guides our future decisions. Sometimes, though, the regrets we have are about missed opportunities or choices that would have really impacted our lives for the better.
Recently, Reddit user Consequence_Green wanted to hear about those regrets when they asked: "What's the biggest regret you have in life?"
The thread got hundreds of responses. Below are the top and best comments:
1."Chasing love so young. Never taking the time to figure out who I am as a person."
"I agree. I went from my father's house to my husband's house. I'm recently separated and working towards a divorce. Now, I'm finally, at 44 years old, beginning to find out who I am, for me."
2."Staying in a job where I wasn’t respected, and staying in any relationship where I was used and my boundaries were crossed because I didn’t know what boundaries were!"
3."I'm surprised no one said this: starting smoking."
"Oh, this hit me so hard. It's expensive, bad for you, and smells. I wish I could travel back in time and knock sense into my younger self, who thought they could just quit anytime."
4."Nearly everything I have worried about and lost sleep over has either never happened or been as bad as I made it out in my head, yet it has taxed me physically and psychologically heavily at that time."
5."Not cutting off toxic people sooner, but I had to learn my own boundaries with the repeated cycle."
6."Not looking after my teeth."
"Same. At this point (I'm in my late 30s), I’m in a Ship of Theseus situation. I had one missing, and now three are missing, with one decaying. If that fractures, there are going to be four missing, at which point I might as well start pulling them and get implants. Take care of your teeth!"
7."Limiting my self-worth and belief because I stammer when I talk."
8."Not sleeping enough. It made me miserable and awful to be around. I was just walking around in a daze, making bad decisions."
9."Cheating on the man I’ve loved more than anyone. He's it, he's the ONE. I don’t even know how to begin because there really is no excuse, but I invited his and my friend over one night to talk to him about a fight that my boyfriend and I had gotten into, and then…it just happened. I felt so disgusted. I’ve never cheated before. Thank goodness he has given me a chance to prove to myself that I’m worth trusting, but it has been almost two years, and I know he still hurts because I do for doing it. I'd give anything to take it back."
10."That I wasn't kinder to myself. I lost so much time and so many cool opportunities because I felt like I wasn't good enough, or I was too anxious, or worrying about what people would think of me, etc. This manifested into something like a voice in my head that tells me how awful I am all the time. I became my own bully — and that s**t ends up being 24/7. It's exhausting."
"I got help later in life, and I'm so happy that my internal dialogue has changed. The anxiety is way down, and I don't care what other people think (mostly). It still happens, of course, and I'm much better managing. But looking back on life, I spent soooooooo much time basically beating myself up mentally."
11."Dropping out of college. I got so homesick and lonely that I left. But if I would've stayed just a few more weeks, I know I would've found my people."
12."Chasing somebody who did not care about me. I always struggled with my self-worth, and after this incident, I felt even worse about myself. I decided never to waste my time on somebody who did not see me as worthy."
13."Not training hard enough to achieve my sporting dreams when I was young. I never regretted it until recently, but watching my son training so hard now (he inherited my athletic genes but with my wife’s work ethic) makes me wonder what I was thinking at the time."
14."Not opening up to my soulmate, causing her to think I'm hiding stuff from her. All it was was embarrassment for being about to lose my job. Also, previous trauma, which I figured was my own responsibility to resolve instead of dumping it on her."
15."Not showing enough love and affection to my deceased mother."
"Similar for me and my grandma. I think of her often and how many missed opportunities I had to show her how much I appreciated and loved her."
16."Not respecting my power, intelligence, and ability as a woman. I grew into it, but it took a few hard knocks to get there."
17."Being so shy and timid, spending time hiding, not living life. Also, not moving abroad. Instead, I stayed because of my friends, boyfriends, relatives, etc., and let them affect my life and career choices. But, sometimes friends, boyfriends, and family like to keep you around for convenience, but don’t hesitate to leave when something THEY desire becomes available."
"Best comment! I agree with everything you say. So much worrying about what other people think, even people I have not seen in years, holds me back. I wonder if because I was bullied when I was young, and now I just hide to keep away from others' judgment and ridicule. It also keeps me from even trying new things and hobbies. Hope that makes sense and that you find peace."
18."Working too much in my 20s — before I knew it I turned 28. Last year, I said yes to every catch-up, party, birthday, and outing, and it was genuinely the best year of my life."
19.And lastly, "In my early 20s, I could have lived abroad with family for a few months to a year in a sunny Mediterranean country. I could have had a beach life: summer barbecues, sunset beers by the sea, etc. I never did it. Now I'm in my mid-40s with a mortgage, responsibilities, etc. I've lived in the same town all my life. If you ever get an opportunity to do something like that while you have the freedom, do it!
You can read the original thread on Reddit.
Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.
