Menopause destroyed my confidence, but now I’m a beauty queen

Gina Broadhurst, 47, co-owns a shutter company with her husband Simon, 52. They live in Surrey with their daughter Genevieve, 11 and son Sterling, 10. For five years she battled perimenopause symptoms including anxiety, exhaustion and memory loss, before starting HRT and deciding to set herself a new challenge.

Heading to bed after another exhausting day at work, I put my face into the pillow and sobbed my heart out. I had no idea why I needed to cry but as the tears flowed, it felt like something of a release.

I was so sad. Fed up of being tired, fed up of feeling angry all the time, fed up of feeling like a second rate version of myself. I couldn't put my finger on why I was crying but this had been going on for months. What on earth was wrong with me?

Until my early forties, I’d been the picture of health with no real ailments. I had a busy job in advertising sales but a supportive husband and two lovely children. Life was pretty good.

But around the age of 41, I started experiencing intense, crushing headaches which were driving me mad. Painkillers didn’t help and I was also exhausted. I could sit in a chair and fall asleep within five minutes. I felt like an old woman in a nursing home.

Dealing with memory loss

When I went to see my GP, I told her my symptoms and she ended up writing ‘TATT’ on my notes – ‘Tired All The Time’. She took a blood test to see if it was menopause but as these blood tests only detect whether you’re in menopause – not perimenopause – the results didn’t give any real answers. My GP said my symptoms were probably down to the stress of work. I needed to slow down.

I went away feeling disheartened that I had no answer. My symptoms got worse. I started forgetting words – really simple things like 'chair' or 'cup'. I knew what I wanted to say but couldn’t bring the word to mind and I was beginning to worry that I was getting early dementia. My joints began to ache, my skin developed rosacea and I even began to get spots – something I never even suffered with as a teenager.

Of course, I now know that these are all classic symptoms of the perimenopause but at the time, I had no idea. Even as little as seven years ago the discussion around menopause was nothing like it is today. I simply thought I was going mad.

I quit my job in ad sales in 2018 and joined my husband in his business which eased things a little. But the symptoms continued. The rage I was experiencing was disturbing. I’d fly off the handle at the most insignificant thing.

Starting HRT

Things came to a head at the end of last year when I contacted my GP and said: "I can’t deal with this anymore, I think I am losing my mind and I need to do something!"

Previously I’d been told that I couldn’t take HRT due to a rare blood disorder which means I’m more likely to get blood clots. I discovered this when I was trying to get pregnant and was still under a gynae team at the hospital. But it was while talking to a new doctor in that team that I discovered I was actually allowed to have HRT, just not certain types, so I was put on patches containing oestrogen and progesterone.

I couldn’t believe it. Finally, I might be given something to alleviate the symptoms. But for one reason and another – including the fact that they lost my referral from the hospital team – it took over five months for me to get the prescription. That’s why I contacted the GP full of rage that day, telling the surgery that I was going to literally do a ‘sit-in’ if they didn’t get that prescription to me immediately.

The GP agreed that something had gone awry and would help me get the HRT as soon as possible.

I started on HRT earlier this year and the change was almost immediate. My headaches improved, my moods evened out, I no longer felt like I was walking around in cotton wool. I began to find my words again. My skin was improving, my joints stopped aching. I began taking other supplements too such as collagen and menopause vitamins and my confidence returned. I felt more at peace with myself.

An empowering new project

A month later I was chatting over Instagram to the regional director who runs the Miss Surrey pageants . I jokingly said something to her like: 'I’m about 20 years too old for you' and she replied saying: 'No, you’d be brilliant for the Classic Division which features older women.'

It planted the seed of an idea. I decided to ask three people – my mum, my husband and my sister – whether I should go for it, fully expecting them to say no. But they didn’t. My sister’s answer particularly moved me. She lost her husband to brain cancer and she said to me, "Yes, take every opportunity to do what life throws at you" so I decided to enter Miss GB. I created a series of Instagram live videos called Live For Now to help women like me feel more empowered and self-confident.

Miss Great Britain is not about being the prettiest woman but being the best version of you and having felt so dreadful for so many years, this is the message I wanted to get across. I’d spent my early to mid-forties feeling like a shadow of myself so I wanted to prove that it wasn’t too late for anyone to shine again.

I decided to invest some time into 'myself'. I’d never even been on a catwalk so I hired a coach to help me present myself to the audience and judges. I threw myself into fundraising for charity and even abseiled down a building and climbed Scafell Pike to raise money.

I did lots of work on my own self-confidence, including visualising myself winning. I’d buy myself little items like necklaces with crowns on them in the hope of manifesting a win.

The big day

But going onto stage in October in a theatre full of 600 people was still terrifying. I remember standing backstage in the wings wearing a gold jumpsuit, watching the other women walk out and thinking, 'What have I let myself in for?'

The competition takes place over two days and involves not only clothes and fashion but interviews with a panel of judges. The moment I was dreading – the swimwear round – was actually one of my favourite moments. There were women of all ages and sizes there – a woman in her 80s with pink hair and a Muslim woman in full modest dress. It was incredibly liberating. Only a year earlier I’d been having bouts of anxiety about even going out of the house. Now I was parading in a bikini in front of strangers.

On the final day when my name was announced as the winner, I could barely speak because I was so shocked. But what thrilled me the most was the looks on my children’s faces. I could see them in the audience. They had been so invested in 'mummy’s new hobby' that they went absolutely loopy when I won. I was over the moon.

Spreading a positive message

As well as the crown and title, I won a £500 travel voucher, a £1000 voucher to spend at an aesthetics clinic and a photoshoot. But for me, it wasn’t about the prizes. It was about doing something I never thought I’d do, coming out of my comfort zone and having one of the most rewarding experiences of my life.

I am now holder of the title until next October and make appearances at events like turning on the local Christmas lights. It’s all a lot of fun and I don’t take myself seriously. The children love it when I put on my crown and 'Queen Mode' is activated.

But I’ve done what I set out to do which is to show other women of my age that life isn’t over when you hit perimenopause. But it’s important that women recognise what’s going on with their body and to insist that doctors listen to them and they get help. This stage of life can drain you of confidence but it doesn’t need to be that way – and hopefully I’m proof of that.