Man Says He Doesn’t Want to Follow His Girlfriend’s Parents’ ‘Demand’ They Get Married in a Church
It “makes no sense for me to do this for something her nor I really care about,” the 24-year-old man wrote on Reddit
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Bride and groom walking down an aisle of a churchA 24-year-old man is going viral for his response to a "non-negotiable" when it comes to a potential wedding with his girlfriend of two and a half years.
The man took to Reddit's "Am I the A------" forum to ask for opinions on whether he was in the wrong for his take on the situation he found himself in after discussing marriage with his partner.
In the post titled "AITA (am I the a—---) for not following my gf's parents demand about our wedding," the poster prefaced that his girlfriend's parents, specifically the mother, is "very religious," in that she attends church every Sunday and "follows all the rules."
He wrote in the post that his girlfriend "goes to church every so often but isn’t that religious," then pointed out where he stands himself, saying “I, on the other hand, can count the amount of times I’ve been in a church on both my hands and none of those times were for a traditional service, mostly funerals and like one wedding.”
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Bride and groom hugging at weddingDescribing himself as "not religious at all," the boyfriend said that he doesn’t want religion "forced" on him but doesn’t hold anything against those that are religious.
In bringing up the topic of marriage with his ‘pretty serious’ girlfriend, he referred to her parents' wishes for the couple to be married in a church as a "hiccup"
“I would need to go through all the steps to get confirmed,” he wrote. “I looked into the process and since I would have to start from scratch, it would take 8-10 months for this to happen.”
The man argued that this “makes no sense for me to do this for something her nor I really care about. If it could be done in less than a month, I wouldn’t care so much. I have even told her I’m fine with the service being in a church and even going as far as having a religious-style wedding.”
When it came to the girlfriend’s say in it all, the poster claimed that she stands firm that the parents have already made up their minds. “She has said there is no sense in trying to convince them otherwise ‘cause they won’t budge, and won’t even try to back me to try and stay on their good sides.”
“They are born and raised NY/NJ Italians, so it makes sense there’s no changing their minds,” he went on in the post. “Am I the a—--- for putting my foot down on not doing all this since it would be our wedding and neither of us care about all this?”
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Commenters did not hold back on sharing their opinions on the user’s situation.
“Ok, so they ‘demand.’ Tell them no.” One user commented, continuing with, “She needs to grow a backbone. She's 24 years old. It's time to stand up.”
“NTA,” meaning "not the a—---," the user continued, “But here's the thing. You are going to be setting a precedent by caving in, if you do. You will be sending a direct message that you will fold like a chair if you do this.”
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A stock image of a bride and groom cutting a wedding cake togetherSimilarly, another comment read, “NTA. But you should not be marrying this woman, at least not yet. She seems unable to put the necessary boundaries between your new family (you and her right now), and her old family. If she lets them get away with this, what will be next? Will they be naming the future baby?”
“NTA but have that discussion NOW,” said another user.
One commenter contributed their take on the girlfriend’s intentions, writing, “Your gf cares about her family approving of her marriage and taking part in her wedding. She may not care that you're not catholic, but you're mistaken in saying neither of you care.”
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