I finally found a way to like Gatorade's Fast Twitch energy drinks

Welcome back to FTW’s Beverage of the Week series. Here, we mostly chronicle and review beers, but happily expand that scope to any beverage (or food) that pairs well with sports. Yes, even cookie dough whiskey.

I very much wanted to like Gatorade's Fast Twitch energy drinks when they first came out. In part because I go through a lot of caffeine every week and could use a little more hydration in the process. But in a larger part because Gatorade went all out supplying NFL writers with its new beverage at major events the last two years. Because I grew up with an incurable case of poor brain, I grabbed as many free drinks as I could whenever possible.

While they did the trick -- lifting me up at various Airbnbs that had limited coffee supplies -- they always felt just a bit off. Something wasn't quite right, between the too-heavy caffeine dose (200 milligrams in 12 ounces) and the too-dense drink itself. Fast Twitch worked in a pinch, but there was room for improvement.

Fortunately, it turns out there's a very easy fix to this. So, let's talk about caffeinated Gatorade.

Cool Blue: A-

On its own, this is just slightly too syrupy. A touch too thick. This keeps it from feeling thirst quenching, which is something I really want either early in the morning or before a(n underwhelming) workout.

But hit it with a mix that makes it about 50/50 water and Fast Twitch? I'm on board. The flavor is potent enough to remain strong despite being cut in half. It is, for lack of a better word, undoubtedly "blue." Is it blueberry? Blue raspberry? I dunno man, just tastes blue.

This helps because I kinda want my energy drinks to last, too. I've got enough of a caffeine tolerance to handle 300-plus milligrams in a morning, but I want that spread out over a few cups of coffee or a couple 16-ounce energy drinks. I understand the utility in delivering that 200mg of caffeine in a compact format so it's not sloshing around in your stomach during a workout, but even just getting this to 20 ounces helps space out how I'm processing caffeine without messing with my physical ability too much.

So, yeah. Gimme 12 ounces of blue that I can turn into 24 to make it taste more like regular Gatorade.

Strawberry Watermelon: B

Like the Cool Blue, this is just a shade too thick to be chuggable, which is pretty important for a sports drink. But like the Cool Blue, it's also dense with flavor, which means it's easy to cut down and thin out. A pint glass filled with ice wasn't enough, but mixing in a second pint of filtered water? Perfect.

For me, that improves the taste of sweet, artificial fruit, taking a bit of the too-syrupy edge off it. The end result is a drink that feels a lot like regular Gatorade; a little light, a little fake-sugary and easy to crush. The caffeine isn't enough to make me jittery -- a benefit of cutting this with water -- but does make me feel a little better about my morning. Did it help my workout? Not especially, but I'm not certain anything's gonna get me there now that I'm 40.

Tropical Mango: B+

Natural mango flavor is an easy way to make a low calorie drink taste creamy, so it's not a surprise Gatorade pushed beyond its normal flavor lineup for this one. Fast Twitch leans into that, which makes it the best of the bunch to drink straight up. The thickness of the energy drink works a lot better when it's got a denser flavor to coat your mouth.

Still, I'm gonna stretch this one out with water because it's still slightly too much. Like the rest of the Fast Twitch lineup, this thins out that texture without too badly damaging the taste. The mango remains sweet and creamy, if coated with the sheen of inauthenticity that comes with flavored, low-calorie drinks.

Glacier Freeze (powder): B-

This is my first foray into powdered Fast Twitch. Finally, the power of caffeine in Pixy Stix form.

The instructions advise mixing the formula with 12 ounces of water, which is not a water bottle size I'm sure I've ever seen in the wild. I'm going with roughly 24, holding true to my "this is all too thick" tenet. It comes out a vibrant purple once mixed, which is very pretty but also definitely not what Glacier Freeze Gatorade actually looks like.

The taste remains strong and with just enough granulation to remind you this came from a packet. It's not gritty or difficult to drink, but noticeable.

Like the mango it's slightly over-sweet. Unlike the mango it's tough to tell with which fruit you're dealing with. It's a bit of a vague mixed berry jamboree, but it's possible I'm just conflating that with the color.

Would I drink it instead of a Hamm's?

This is a pass/fail mechanism where I compare whatever I’m drinking to my baseline cheap beer. That’s the standby from the land of sky-blue waters, Hamm’s. So the question to answer is: on a typical day, would I drink Gatorade Fast Twitch over a cold can of Hamm’s?

Weird comparison, but sure. I'd probably drink some, cut with water, on the way to the tailgate where I drink Hamm's.

This article originally appeared on For The Win: I finally found a way to like Gatorade's Fast Twitch energy drinks