Ben Fogle's heartbreaking 'crippling paranoia and anxiety' after missing stillbirth of son
Ben Fogle has opened up about his experience of baby loss in a new interview. The New Lives in the Wild presenter - who shares children Ludovic, 15, and daughter Iona, 13, with his wife Marina - is breaking his silence to encourage others not to bottle up their emotions, as he did.
In 2008, before Ludovic and Iona were born, the couple experienced a heartbreaking miscarriage and in 2014, their son Willem was sadly stillborn.
In a brave interview with The Sun, the presenter opened up about his loss and the struggles he had with his emotions since. What made the horrific situation even worse was the fact Ben wasn't even in the country when Marina was rushed into hospital.
"A number of years ago, my wife and I lost a son, who was stillborn and it's amazing how you deal with a loss like that. My wife Marina was very raw with her emotions," he said.
"Mine were much more measured, it doesn't mean I felt it any less, but I probably kept them within, and one of the big things that happened to me was that I became obsessed about control, because I'd lost control there.
"I was actually in Canada when it happened, and I had to take a flight to get back. I didn't know if my wife was going to survive. It was like one of the periods in my life, I've had a few, when I had lost all control. And what my brain, this amazing thing, did was it made me absolutely obsessed about control. And I wanted to control everything."
Marina herself has opened up about her son dying when she was 33 weeks pregnant, writing a piece for Tommy's, a pregnancy and baby charity.
After heavy bleeding and an emergency caesarean, Marina was told her baby had died. "Initially I was in shock and very ill, I'd suffered a placenta abruption and hemorrhaged which was terrifying. I met our son, held him but I was feeling very numb. It was three or four days later that the tears came."
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Marina explained that talking about it helped: "I found every time I acknowledged I'd had a baby who was stillborn it helped my brain start to accept what had happened."
Regarding people's reactions around her after her loss, she notes: "The worst thing you can do is not acknowledge the loss at all. Say anything, even if it’s the wrong thing, when people said nothing, it felt like they didn’t care."
Still battling with his grief, in 2023, Ben suffered a mental health episode of "crippling paranoia and anxiety" and a year later he spoke out online about it. "A year ago I suffered a mental health wobble. An episode. A storm. A blip. I don't know if there is a specific term for it, but it was basically a burnt out breakdown... Through a mix of CBT, medicine, and now some alternative therapies I feel like my old self. Gone is the crippling paranoia and anxiety, replaced by my calm old self."
Ben also encouraged others to get help if they need it, writing: "A mental health trauma should not be a stigma but a reality check for the increasingly complicated world in which we live."
Sharing his own personal experience received a plethora of praise online from fans. "It's humbling to know that someone who appears to have it all… success, good looks, wealth, career, love, and family can suffer just the same challenges in life as the rest of us. You are a good man Ben, and it’s always good to hear your honesty and thoughts about life," penned one Instagram user. "What a lovely, honest and powerful message (that I am certain will help so many more people than you even realise)," added another. A third, remarked: "Not all battles are visible yet some of the biggest mountains we climb are in our heads. It takes strength to share our vulnerabilities. Thank you for sharing."
If you've experienced baby loss and need to talk, here are some helpful resources:
Call or email Tommy's 0800 0147 800 / midwife@tommys.org
Call or email Sands 07803 751229 / hello@achildofmine.org.uk
Call or email The Lullaby Trust 0808 802 6868 / support@lullabytrust.org.uk
