Andrew Scott’s audio erotica is sending the TikTok girlies feral

new york, new york may 06 andrew scott attends the 2024 met gala celebrating sleeping beauties reawakening fashion at the metropolitan museum of art on may 06, 2024 in new york city photo by theo wargogathe hollywood reporter via getty images
We’re all losing it over Andrew Scott’s audio pornTheo Wargo/GA

Ever since Andrew Scott uttered the command, ‘kneel’ – as the hot priest in Fleabag, obvs – he’s had a subsection of the population fawning at his feet. And, if they’ve been praying for more of his sultry orders, this week they’ve got it with a bang. Shut your doors, grab your headphones: Andrew Scott is doing audio porn.

Well, more accurately, audio erotica. The Ripley and All of Us Strangers star has landed a role in audio erotica app Quinn’s new series, The Queen’s Guard. In it, Scott plays Robb the Protector, a personal guard to a tyrannical queen, whose job it is to stop the leader of a growing resistance, Mira, from getting anywhere near her. In a teaser for the series, Scott’s character reads in a breathy tone: “Look at you; look at how beautifully your body bears the marks of everything you’ve been through. I could worship every one of them.”

At the end of the clip, the actor himself says: “I know a lot of you out there love a bit of fantasy and historical fiction. I think you’re going to really fall in love with this story.”

Quinn revealed Scott as their latest star on Monday (May 13) after teasing it on social media for the last few weeks, but before dropping the first episode yesterday (May 16). In the full trailer for the series, Scott explains that Mira is played by the listeners and that she and Robb “have some history”.

“[Robb] has this conflict between his loyalty to the kingdom and his real sense of love and affection for Mira,” the actor continues, “And the plot thickens. Do we risk our sense of safety in order to have the explosive, exciting, beautiful feeling of falling in love again and risking your heart? It’s a scary thing to do, but love is worth the risk.”

Obviously everyone’s losing it – and especially the girlies on TikTok. “I tried listening to episode one in the car… yeah, I’m never doing that again,” reads one comment, which Quinn stitched with an audio of Scott reading, “Come on Mira, you’re just going to let me pin you up against the wall? We’re just getting started”. Another responded to the clip: “I was so glad I was not driving while listening. I would have driven off the road, over the river, and through the woods.”

Other particularly horny comments include: “Andrew Scott breathing heavily is my new religion”, “Launching this during my ovulation week is diabolical”, and “Gnawing at the bars of my enclosure”. Hot!

Some people (including the Cosmo team) can’t cope with the arrival of Andrew Scott’s dirty talking and Bridgerton on the same day. As Quinn’s social media editor put it: “First Bridgerton and now 38 minutes of Andrew Scott dirty talking???? It was nice knowing y’all.”

If you’re brave enough to binge both over the weekend, you can sign up to Quinn here (subscriptions start from £3.15 per month) and listen to episode one of The Queen’s Guard now.

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