Amanda Holden has been through a lot in recent years. The TV presenter has two children, Lexi, eight, and Hollie, three, but tragically suffered both a miscarriage and a stillbirth before her second child’s arrival.
Things didn’t ease up for the Britain’s Got Talent judge during Hollie’s birth, either. The TV presenter came dangerously close to death after suffering massive blood loss and had to spend a number of days in intensive care to recover.
Three years later, Amanda’s resigned herself to the fact that she won’t be able to have any more children. “I’m not allowed,” she says in the June 2015 issue of Good Housekeeping.
“I would be dead the next time. And I think Chris [her husband] would say you can have them but you’re not having them with me. I’ve got the two I’m supposed to have. I just had to complete my family to feel like I could be me.”
The mum-of-two says therapy got her through her past tragedies.
“My therapist told me I had no more tools or coping mechanism left,” she says. “She was very good at giving me sentences to say to myself to make me stop panicking about my own mortality.
“I think you have none of these worries unless you’ve got children. If it had just been me and Chris and I’d died, it would have been awful for him but nowhere near as bad as a child losing their mother. It makes you suddenly think, I have to live. I’ve got to live, but I’ve got to try and live a good, happy life for me too and I think that’s why I faced up to the fact that I needed to speak to somebody.”
Lily Allen’s another celebrity mum who’s experienced both a miscarriage and a stillbirth, while in the public eye. The British singer has also opened up about her heartbreaking experiences and previously said it’s not something she would wish on her worst enemy.
She spoke about it on The Jonathan Ross Show last November, saying, “I think it’s difficult for anybody regardless of what world they live in and actually what I took home from that experience was… Even though it was the most unfortunate thing that can even happen to a person, I was very fortunate in the sense that I have a loving partner to go home to and share that experience with.”
Both Lily and Amanda campaign for support for women who have gone through similar ordeals – in the UK alone there are over 3,500 stillbirths a year, making it far more common than you may think.
Eleven babies are stillborn every day in the UK, making it 15 times more common than cot death, the NHS website states.
Miscarriages are also much more common than most people realise. In women that know they’re pregnant, it’s estimated that around one in seven pregnancies end in miscarriage and a whole lot more miscarriages happen before women are even aware that they’re expecting a baby.
There are a number of places that you can go to for support, if you’ve gone through, or are going through, a similar experience to Lily and Amanda. Sands, the stillbirth and neonatal death charity, has a helpline for those affected to contact as does The Miscarriage Association.
[Celebrity Mum Claire Sweeney Says Aspirin Stopped Her From Having A Third Miscarriage]
[Could Miscarriages Be Prevented With A £100 Hormone Gel?]