55 Very, Very, Funny Tweets From The Extremely Long Month Of January
Folks, the first month of 2024 is almost complete and for some reason, January ALWAYS feels like a million years long.
one thing about January is that she's going to make sure you feel all 31 of her days
— iced latté ⚕️ (@_veuillez) January 24, 2024
@_veuillez
Well, Twitter was pretty hilarious this month, from award show memes to the Chicago rat hole, I genuinely had a great time scrolling. I've gathered January's best tweets from BuzzFeed's weekly viral tweets, fails, and Black Twitter for your enjoyment, so let's get into it:
1.
“They know me here” pic.twitter.com/nEy8ojMJCn
— Patrick Monahan (@pattymo) January 21, 2024
@pattymo
2.
told my grandma the time of my graduation & date & this what she said….. bruh…. pic.twitter.com/Zp40h7NvSw
— pacience (@fendiflikks) January 17, 2024
@fendifikks
3.
I just fell on this mat yall im so irritated 🤬😤 pic.twitter.com/l4skfPy0gM
— . (@lexxijeannnnnnn) January 9, 2024
@lexxijeannnnnn
4.
yo why is my bartender googling “vodka soda” rn pic.twitter.com/BkdNTWJvkW
— Norb Lamby (@oh_bloodynora) January 14, 2024
@oh_bloodynora
5.
I visited a gun shop in Indiana once and had to use the bathroom; inside was a portrait of a naked man with a thick wooden board covering where his private part would be. Curiosity got the best of me and I tried to lift the board. It let off an air horn throughout the whole store
— Brianna (@singingbirth) January 21, 2024
@singingbirth
6.
paid tribute to the chicago rat hole today pic.twitter.com/jDM1vWPPNo
— beer person (@CantEverDie) January 13, 2024
@CantEverDie
7.
I had an apartment inspection 😭 pic.twitter.com/76RyI3VGYx
— ᥫ᭡ T. Garielle 💕 (@Locwittati) January 19, 2024
@Locwittati
8.
sneezed like 5 times really loudly and my neighbour said shut the fuck up behind the wall next to my bed pic.twitter.com/L40EyG6GnD
— اقراﺀ (@ghoulhag) January 22, 2024
ABC / @ghoulhag
9.
I feel there could have been a better way for management to diarise my annual leave pic.twitter.com/GcPHGQCtCu
— jack (@hiyajackk) January 22, 2024
@hiyajackk
10.
Who Made This? 🤣 pic.twitter.com/0BhZO0JJ0A
— Shawn K The King (@SKTheKingYT) January 10, 2024
Amazon Prime / @SKTheKingYT
11.
Jealous of everyone who gets drunk and does normal things like online shop. Tell me why I just got this email pic.twitter.com/z5APgB78P8
— eliza (@elizamclamb) January 7, 2024
@elizamclamb
12.
As disgusting as it is, it would solve all my financial problems https://t.co/XJf4lkstVk
— Trevor (@Tokyo_Trev) January 8, 2024
@Alphafox78 / @Tokyo_Trev
13.
Me trying to put on my shoe without having to use my fingers to help me pic.twitter.com/CNdI7ReC3a
— 𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐨 ✰🧸 (@ilydari0z) January 20, 2024
@ilydari0z
14.
Back when our hedgehog died, my wife went in the backyard to dig a grave and while i trying not to cry in the kitchen I get this text from her and it made me giggle. pic.twitter.com/rKTdwqPmzn
— Hispanic Shaun King (@okimstillhungry) January 22, 2024
@okimstillhungry
15.
is this normal pic.twitter.com/81IiIat3pC
— 🗣 (@storylinefever) January 11, 2024
@storylinefever
16.
Oh okay so when Jason Kelce does it everyone loves it but when I do it it’s “time to go home” pic.twitter.com/y80wsuru7d
— Charlotte Wilder (@TheWilderThings) January 22, 2024
NFL / @TheWilderThings
17.
In tha criminal fahkin justice system, the people ah represented by two separate yet equally important groups: The police, who investigate crime, and the district attorneys, who prosecute the offendahs. These ah their stories, kid. pic.twitter.com/DhBatEy9dR
— Anthony Zonfrelli (@azonfrelli) January 20, 2024
@azonfrelli
18.
years ago this would've got u on ellen https://t.co/YKcEGrQY2D
— ronan (@rxnanbell) January 9, 2024
@SOFTBOILEDEGG / @rxnanbell
19.
they’re calling the white people thugs ! pic.twitter.com/xYRVNOcjx3
— nina wit da nina ✰ (@ninakapri) January 22, 2024
@ninakapri
20.
Steam pic.twitter.com/h60VvbdoHY
— democore rahad jackson (@nickhexum311) January 20, 2024
@nickhexum311
21.
A what ????????? pic.twitter.com/b1RqcrbuEj
— Princess ☪︎ (@amyrrlee) January 23, 2024
@amyrriee
22.
“When one door closes, another opens.” — Boeing
— Stone Cold Jane Austen (@AbbyHiggs) January 9, 2024
@AbbyHiggs
23.
Ron DeSantis the minute he dropped out of the presidential race: pic.twitter.com/dQqmtjEp29
— eric (@MrEAnders) January 22, 2024
HBO / @MrEAnders
24.
imagine walking out the door at the same time and you kiss on accident https://t.co/qN6jW10PtZ
— leisha (@leisha1196) January 7, 2024
@shanontherun / @leisha1196
25.
DONT GO TO THE DMV WITH ONLY ONE PROOF OF IDENTIFICATION pic.twitter.com/8W9eiTL5t6
— Brock (@brockomole) January 12, 2024
@brockomole
26.
put them in the bear pic.twitter.com/RovgRvolHq
— anne (@onepoorsonnet) January 23, 2024
Disney+ / @onepoorsonnet
27.
tried to take an outfit pic, but someone had other plans.. pic.twitter.com/E6dwK00n5w
— bella (@earlygirl__) January 14, 2024
@earlygirl__
28.
I go to Walmart everyday and put me some eggs in my pocket 🙏🏽💪🏽 pic.twitter.com/nUBxPoJuWc
— 𝟚ꫝⅈᧁꫝ𝟚ᥴ𝕣ꪗ 🌶️ (@xo_dreamyy) January 18, 2024
@xo_dreamyy
29.
— no name (@pradaice) January 26, 2024
@pradaice
30.
"incorrect username or password"BITCH, WHICH ONE IS IT!!!!!! pic.twitter.com/q9qWtSqT3H
— Jenni (@hashjenni) January 18, 2024
Netflix / @hashjenni
31.
my uterine lining is falling out of my body but yes, sir, how may I help you.
— .:RiotGrlErin:. (@RiotGrlErin) January 17, 2024
32.
every time i get angry i take another bite out of my clock pic.twitter.com/ExeCnpaKy0
— horse dentist (@equine__dentist) January 26, 2024
@equine_dentist
33.
I LOVE smoking with paranoid bitches like yes girl they are coming but we are stronger!!!
— Rachel S. Lurs 🔻 (@finallgirll) January 15, 2024
@finallgirll
34.
perfect location for a chili’s https://t.co/lkWFui3RX7 pic.twitter.com/U96S0mOVkU
— stoolie memes (@StoolieMemes) January 18, 2024
35.
her body is literally tea pic.twitter.com/aUYF4HX4pp
— paige (@vampsneverhurtu) January 10, 2024
@vampsneverhurtu
36.
Just rejected all cookies on a website… OKAYYYYYYYY it’s giving skinny!
— macklin (@saintmacklin) January 16, 2024
@saintmacklin
37.
— rare insults (@insultsrare) January 27, 2024
@insultsrare
38.
how i look at the man i told everyone i hate pic.twitter.com/Eb4jd1Hke5
— tat 🪲 (@heluvstat) January 27, 2024
Hot Ones / @heluvstat
39.
I received three job rejections today and it's just like... am I not my grandma's special boy to these people
— not using my name anymore bc it’s cooler that way (@yeahnahaye_) January 12, 2024
@yeahnahaye_
40.
It’s gone past well done, it’s on Congratulations https://t.co/a008ZZbKhx
— Tshayingwe (@LukanyoMngqolo) January 27, 2024
@LukanyoMngqolo
41.
deciding between garlic or buttered naan like that's the real naan binary
— 𝔎𝔥𝔞𝔡𝔦𝔧𝔞𝔥 🗝₊˚⊹♡ (@gwenisonline) January 16, 2024
@gwenisonline
42.
i like candles cuz it's kinda like having fire as a pet
— Jenna SaysQuoi (@jennasaysquoi) January 26, 2024
@jennasaysquoi
43.
“if i don’t win i’m leaving” SHE’S SO UNSERIOUS😭😭😭😭😭 pic.twitter.com/yG6DBcKRRr
— 𝗱𝗮𝗻𝗻𝘆🫧💚 (@beyoncegarden) January 8, 2024
CBS / @beyoncegarden
44.
my bf had a bad experience getting a sub the other day where they put an ungodly amount of mayo on his sandwich and then that night he was talking in his sleep like “that’s plenty…. that enough may—“ homie was having stress dreams about mayo
— neanderthalya (@thalyamk) January 8, 2024
@thalymak
45.
Well this is new. My pepper is with child. pic.twitter.com/ttvL0sSPYW
— Kay (@KaylarWill) January 18, 2024
@KaylarWill
46.
I told my mom that her apple pie tasted a little weird this year, and she goes “Really? I always use the same recipe. The nutmeg was a bit clumpy, maybe it didn’t blend well…”She takes out the jar to show me, and after a very long pause, I say “Mom…this expired 24 years ago.” pic.twitter.com/mhFutRzinM
— Sarah McGonagall (@gothspiderbitch) January 6, 2024
@gothspiderbitch
47.
Me establishing a boundary pic.twitter.com/VLz60Nmu8r
— danlet (@evildanevil) January 24, 2024
@evildanevil
48.
full day pic.twitter.com/mI1Rt00w78
— sam (@grillpill_) January 25, 2024
@grillpill_
49.
i love when a restaurant’s bathroom is in the basement. it’s like ok brb i’m gonna go explore the catacombs
— chase (@_chase_____) January 7, 2024
@_chase____
50.
welcome to arrowhead bitches pic.twitter.com/GJrRlhmFJ6
— platinum sombrero (@platinombrero) January 14, 2024
@platinombrero
51.
@RGT_Thoughts / @843KT
52.
going to the philippines pic.twitter.com/WU8beQyHcE
— ℑ (@milkshapes) January 4, 2024
@milkshapes
53.
My husband made those easy bake pillsbury crescent rolls this morning.Ladies and gentlemen, the crescent rolls: pic.twitter.com/yU5keyGY7M
— Nimisha Barton (@NimishaBarton) January 1, 2024
@NimishaBarton
54.
Black people will make fun of you for anything, I wore a trench coat to dinner 4 months ago & up till now I’m still being called inspector gadget 😒
— v ★ (@venuvelli) January 14, 2024
@venuvelli
55.
When I randomly remember one of my shirts I haven’t seen in a while pic.twitter.com/Rgy2I7RFYW
— rev (@whyrev) January 19, 2024
Disney+ / @whyrev
Which tweet made you cackle in January's tweet roundup? Let us know your favorites in the comments below and we'll see you back here in February!
Be sure to check out our previous monthly tweet roundups here for more laughs!