26 Shocking And Horrifying Secrets People Discovered About Their Families
Lat year, we wrote about secrets people are hiding from their families — and the BuzzFeed Community piped in with some *piping* hot secrets family members had kept from them! Here are 26 wild family secrets that were uncovered.
1."My family kept who my biological father is from me. It wasn’t until I did a DNA ancestry test that I found out that my biological father was my mother's high school chemistry teacher. It was a big scandal at the high school. The teacher was also the girl's varsity basketball coach and had been sleeping with several girls from the team. Not only did I find out who my father was, but I also found three half-siblings."
—Anonymous
2."When I was 21, I wanted to do some volunteer/missionary work with a local church organization. They required that I get medical history on both my mother's and my father's side of the family, for insurance purposes. When I talked to my parents about this, they weirdly said they would talk it over and get back to me. Huh? Okay, I guess...The next day, I was playing street hockey with my friends, when I got a page from them (back in the days of pagers) to call them. So, I did, and they told me I needed to come home, right away. When I got there, there was my oldest sister, sitting with them in the living room. They all told me they had something very important to tell me. Turns out, the woman I had believed for 21 years to be my oldest sister was my biological mother."
"She had gotten pregnant with me when she was 17, by her then-boyfriend who was 19. Turned out the guy was seeing other women at the time, and dumped her, so she never told him she was pregnant. When she finally told her mom, (my grandmother ) who was also pregnant with her youngest, and due at the same time, they decided they would give birth together, and my grandmother would raise both babies as twins to save face. They were a very religious family."
—Anonymous
3."My dad once had an affair. The woman he was seeing gave him a gun. My mom found it, but he had an excuse, of course. Eventually, it came to light where the gun was from. I don’t know if a plan had been hatched to kill my mom, my sister, and me. It didn’t work out anyway because his other woman was shot in the face by her husband before he took his own life. He left a path of destruction everywhere he went."
—Anonymous
4."When I was two, my bio mom took off, never to be heard from again. Growing up, my whole life I would always ask about her, ask to see her, ask if my dad knew where she was, and if she wanted to meet me. To this day I have the few small gifts she gave me as a baby. I was always told he had no idea where she was, she vanished and I probably would never see her again. Fast forward and I’m an adult. I tracked her down thanks to some internet sleuthing and found out I also have four siblings. Long story short, the secret was that my father never lost touch with her and always knew where she was and how to get in contact with her. In fact, she lived less than 10 minutes away from me for years."
"He just made the decision that I would be better off without her and she didn’t care to fight it, so he lied to me for most of my life. It would have been nice to know my family, especially my siblings. I was raised as an only child with no real extended family and as much as I would love a close relationship more than anything, we’re not all close. They’re all grown and have their own life, and their own life together that I’m not really a part of and it stings. One of my siblings is my absolute favorite person in the world and we are close, but I barely know the others and it breaks my heart. I know she could have tried to see me or build a relationship and he was doing what he thought was best to protect me (he was sort of right…) but he’s gone now and so is the majority of my family so it hurts being alone knowing that I have immediate family out there."
—Anonymous
5."That the guy my mom lived with when I was a teenager was a cocaine dealer. I was too naive to realize it, but it's so obvious in hindsight. He would set us kids up with free limousine rides and the driver would buy us junk food at gas stations if we asked. He would have a different new car every week. He had a revolving door of 'friends' visit the house. He had a lot of rich friends, and I met a lot of them while they were at work in the offices. I'm also sure he attempted to traffic me. He offered me all sorts of expensive gifts to date his 'friends.' I always turned them down because I had a boyfriend plus I'm not materialistic and I wasn't interested in gold jewelry or cars. It was two decades before my mom came clean about it all."
—Anonymous
6."I was born with a brain condition that was diagnosed when I was 11 years old. My parents sent me to the best neurosurgeon in North America at that time. After looking at the images, the doctor determined that my condition was too serious and that I was likely to die on the operating table. My parents were told to take me home and let me live with the condition until I died. My whole family knew that I could suddenly die, except me. My parents never told me. At 16, I had a small hemorrhage and the doctor I had at the time recommended surgery. I survived with partial paralysis. My sister told me several years later that she would always get tense when the phone rang because she was unconsciously waiting for a phone call to say I had died."
—Anonymous
7."My grandmother recently died and my mother had done one of those DNA things. Turns out, my grandmother had a child in secret and gave him up for adoption. He found us shortly after her death. But crazy thing is that he lived and grew up in the same town my mother did and they never ran into each other. Sadly, when he contacted us, he was dying of brain cancer and died days before we could meet him. We live in Florida now and he was still in our hometown. My grandmother took that secret to her grave."
—Anonymous
8."My grandfather, who had helped raise me from the age of 10 due to having been removed from my mother and stepfather’s home for severe physical, emotional, sexual, and psychological abuse, was a convicted sex offender, and there was a distinct possibility I was born from incest."
"Thankfully the DNA test I took showed I wasn’t, but it was a frightening possibility. I was an adult when I learned of this, and a number of other things. But this one was the most shocking. He was an Army veteran from the Vietnam War, and was 'honorably' discharged the year I was born. Come to find out, he was forced to retire because the Army found out about the charges against him. The only reason I found out was because I was renting a property to him and he was preparing to move to another town. He was drunk and was talking to me about being worried about not being able to move. When I asked why, he just bluntly said, 'Because I’m a registered sex offender. I was in jail for two years after you were born because I was having sex with your mother.' To say I was shocked was an understatement. This was a man I regularly had let watch my two boys, that I had the utmost respect for. And to make matters worse, that meant the state Child Protective Services, knowing he was a sex offender, placed me in his home as a preteen. My mother confirmed the story, and admitted it was consensual (yuck), and after the DNA test was clear, I cut the entire family out for keeping me in the dark. The sad thing is, that wasn’t the only revelation that night. Come to find out, he had been sleeping with my ex-wife before he got with the woman he was moving in with."
—Anonymous
9."That my maternal grandfather (whose home we often had sleepovers at as children) molested my mother and aunt their entire lives, leading to my mother having an abortion at 12 years old with my grandfather's child. AND THEY STILL LET ME SLEEP OVER AT HIS HOUSE."
—Anonymous
10."My best friend's mom had her phone tapped and listened to our conversations all through high school. She would periodically call my mom to tell her everything I'd ever done. (First time I smoked weed, lost my virginity, stole some candy, skipped school, normal teenage things.) My parents somehow found out about it. That really messed me up when I found out the truth years later."
—Anonymous
11."After my mom and my uncle (her brother) died, my sister, who is interested in genealogy, looked into my mom's father's side of the family. He died when my mom was 16 so we never knew a lot about his extended family. My grandmother lived to be 93 so she told us a great deal about her family. After much searching, my sister uncovered a real scandal. My grandfather had another family a few hours away, including a daughter. Unfortunately, my mom's half-sibling and her mother had passed away many years before my mom. We will never know if my mom, my uncle, or my grandmother for that matter, had any idea and if they did, why they never told us."
—Anonymous
12."I have two older brothers I didn’t know about until I was 15. They were from my dad’s first marriage and his ex-wife had cut off all contact after the divorce and basically told them all sorts of lies about how my dad was an awful person who hated them, never wanted them, etc…turns out she was an alcoholic and one of the 12 steps is to make amends to the people you hurt, so after 20 years she tells my brothers the truth about my dad. I got to meet the oldest in 1993, he died a couple of years later. I didn’t meet the other one until 2009…he’s 15 years older than me and I look pretty much exactly like him. But that’s still a whole lifetime everyone missed knowing each other for."
—Anonymous
13."A few years ago my sister and I were contacted by a random guy that turned out to be my full-blood brother. Parents had put him up for adoption before we were born and never told anyone about it. Now we have a relationship with him. A week ago I heard from a second one. He was born after my younger sister and put up for adoption. They didn’t tell us about him when we found out about the first one."
—Anonymous
14."When I was about 11, my sister went to live with my aunt across the country. She was 16 and got into a lot of trouble: guys, sneaking out, alcohol, you name it. She and my dad fought all the time, then one day I’m told she’s going to live with my aunt."
"It turned out that there was a special school/rehab out there she asked to go to, but I wasn’t told this until many years later…I can see why they wouldn’t want to tell a kid but the only thing I saw was my sister fighting with my dad and then her being sent away. I’m not upset with my parents or anything but I would have liked to have known the truth so I didn’t fear getting sent away any time I got into trouble."
—Anonymous
15."Through an Ancestry email my sister found out that we had a sister that we did not know about. After inquiring, my sister found out that my parents had a first child and put her up for adoption before they were married. Not that unusual for the 1950s, but the devastating news was that the two eldest sisters were told about her, but my one sister and I were not. For a time in the 1970s, my parents had a relationship with her and her husband and children. My two eldest siblings met her also. Other family members either met her or knew of her existence. When we tried to discuss the betrayal (not of the adoption, but the fact two siblings knew about her and two didn't) with our mother we were rejected and then shunned by the whole family for 'attacking' our mother."
"My mother passed away a few years later without ever contacting us again and we each received a copy of a new will stating that my sister and I were disinherited. I feel like my whole life was based on a lie."
—Anonymous
16."My mother had a brother who was in prison when he was young. Apparently, he was only two years younger than my mother. Found out he existed only after he died and I was contacted as I was his next of kin. He died alcoholic, lonely, and owning only the clothes he was wearing."
—Anonymous
17."I was raised as an only child by a single (divorced) mother. After about four years of age, we never saw, heard from, or received support from my father. It wasn’t until my own daughter went away to college and was working on alumni records on the internet that she accidentally found who she thought was my father. When she came home on break she presented me with the info and I wrestled with whether or not go contact him. After much soul-searching, I decided to contact my father. It turned out that the person wasn’t my father but a brother I never knew I had. Not only did I learn that my father was deceased but that I also had a total of four brothers, two older and two younger, and a sister who died as a child."
"Seems my father wasn’t such a nice guy, had multiple wives, none of whom he treated well, which is why my mother was so hurt and decided to cut all ties with my father. I suppose this is why she kept my siblings a mystery. Imagine finding out you aren’t an only child in your forties."
—Anonymous
18."I have an older half brother (birth dad’s side, I’m my mom's only child) in another country. My dad didn’t even tell me. He told my now ex boyfriend when I left the room one day."
—Anonymous
19."My brother had a bachelor party a few weeks before his wedding. His group of friends were nice to your face but kind of sleazy in reality. A few of his friends were in committed long-term relationships or married. My cousin attended the bachelor party, I didn't as I was out of the country. Turns out the brother of the bride brought a ton of coke and weed to the bachelor party. My cousin had some weed but was very aware of his surroundings. Late into the night, the bride's brother had ordered sex workers."
"Two came and a few of the guys went into the rooms with them, even my brother. One of the friends missed this opportunity and was upset so he ordered two more sex workers. A total of seven sex workers came to the house throughout the night. My cousin was so shocked with this that he ended up leaving. My brother was worried he would snitch so he and a few friends left the Bachelor party very late into the night in a car to find my cousin, and yes they were under the influence. My cousin went home safely and my brother contacted him first thing in the morning and asked him if he remembered anything from last night; of course, he said no as he was scared of potential threats. My brother called him a few times to make sure he wouldn't say anything and that it would be a big problem for my cousin if he did. My cousin obviously told me right away and I confirmed it with another friend who ended up staying there but didn't partake in the activities.
Since then I have lost all respect for my brother but I still keep in touch with him out of familial obligations. I was never that disgusted or horrified of someone's choices until then. His poor wife doesn't know to this day. To make things worse, one of his friends had a bachelor party and the same thing happened again that my brother took part in while married. I never looked at him the same way again."
—Anonymous
20."My grandma had a child in the '60s that she was forced to give up for adoption because she was a teenager living at home, and already had one kid. Most people in her life didn’t even know she was pregnant. After she had the baby, she saved up to get her own place and would check on the baby every day to make sure they were still there. When she finally had everything in order she went to get her kid and they had already been adopted out. She says she was so heartbroken that she never wanted to talk about it again. Almost 15 years ago a girl, my cousin, reached out to my mom on Facebook saying she thought she was related to us. Everything came out in the open and we met them. At first I think it was heartbreaking for my grandma all over again but now she has even more grandchildren, and she loves it!"
—Anonymous
21."The person I call Dad moved in when I was two, right after my biological father (whom I’ve never met) moved out after the divorce. My dad became the father figure of the household and financially supported us five kids, but was never romantically involved with my mom. In fact when I was four, my mom’s much younger boyfriend also moved in and we all lived together until my teenage years when they broke up. My family tree in elementary school was me, my mom, my dad, and my mom’s boyfriend, something I thought to be completely normal at the time. As the youngest 'oops baby,' I was talking to my much older brother one day, wishing I was my Dad’s biological daughter. I thought about that a lot for some reason. He came clean and told me that my mom had an affair with who I call Dad, got pregnant with his baby, subsequently got an abortion, then got pregnant again immediately after that with me, but this time with her husband (our biological father)."
"My brother said after my birth in the hospital, my mom handed me to who I call Dad and said 'Here is your daughter.' Did I also tell you my biological father was my Dad’s boss at the time? I learned that twist too. I’m in my 40s now and always knew myself to have the best Dad ever. We’re very close and I am grateful for this sequence of events. Bless him for loving and treating me as his own anyway, knowing my mom purposefully aborted his. But wow, that’s just cold. I know my biological father to be an abusive sociopath and my mom is a vain, self-absorbed controlling narcissist, so unfortunately I can’t say I’m surprised by this. But I do like to think my mom knew she was giving he and I a better life by appointing him as my dad. Funny enough, he and my mom did eventually get married and are still together."
—Anonymous
22."Every illness my mom ever had, my parents kept from me. Heart attack? Didn’t know. Second heart attack? Didn’t find out until much later. Cancer? Didn’t tell me. I know they felt like they were protecting me (I’m an only child), but I wish they would have been more upfront about it and let me figure out how to deal with it, instead of not knowing and being shocked when I heard about it from someone other than them."
—Anonymous
23."My father had a relationship with the grade one teacher in my elementary school. The relationship continued for 48 years. It was a not-so-secret secret. When he was dying in hospice my mom never left his side. The staff saw this as love and devotion. The truth was, my father wanted to call his girlfriend to say goodbye and my mom wanted to have the last hurt. He was put on morphine and only then did she leave. Hospice called two days later to say he died. Mom didn’t go back to collect his things and she never mentioned him again."
—Anonymous
24."I found out my mom was having an affair on her girlfriend (who has raised me since I was a baby). I can't remember how I found out, I've repressed a lot of those memories but it caused a major impact on my relationship with my birth mom. Her affairs have left me traumatized as her boyfriend was abusive and no one in my family did anything to help me even though they knew I found out and was in danger every day until I was 18. I've since moved in with my other mom and have a strong relationship with her."
—Anonymous
25."A few years ago I did the DNA testing and someone showed up that I had never heard of that was a very close match to me — they shared about 50% of my genetics. I asked my mom about it and she didn’t know. I asked my dad and nope, he didn’t know either. After my father passed away some of my cousins came for the service. I asked if anyone knew who this guy was…turns out he’s my brother (my cousin had figured it out) but no one knows if my dad knew because he never mentioned him to anyone. He’s six years older than me and born in the town my dad was living in at the time when he was 19. Surprise! I have a brother!"
—Anonymous
26.And finally, here's a fam secret that goes WAY back: "I am into family tree research. This is actually about dad's family. My paternal great-grandmother was the result of my great-great-grandfather impregnating his 13/14-year-old stepdaughter. My great-grandmother was then raised and presented to the community as the daughter of him and his wife, but that wife was my great-grandmother's grandmother, not her birth mother. She only found out who her mother was at age 17 on her wedding day when her older half-sister ( jealous her younger half-sister was marrying) ... revealed who her birth mother actually was."
"She ran to him in tears and told him she would understand if he did not want to marry a bastard, he said nonsense nothing your sister says is going to stop this marriage. This drama echoed down through the next three generations of the family. That same great-great-grandfather who impregnated his stepdaughter emotionally abused the half-sister and neglected her while showering my great-grandmother with his total devotion. He caused the sisters to be rivals for his attention, rather than normal sisters growing up in the same home. He hurt his children through both actions and inaction. My dad and aunt didn't learn the truth of their grandmother until they were in their early twenties and grandpa's older sister told my aunt the truth resulting in grandpa going into a red-faced rage yelling at her. So many lies causing so much drama across three generations of the family. Family secrets can metastasize like cancer if not removed."
—Anonymous
Submissions have been edited for length/clarity.
