For 25 years I’ve sent Christmas cards to all my friends. This is why I’m stopping now

The tree is up, the wreath is made and having a cheeky mince pie with my morning coffee has been acceptable practice for at least a week.

But there’s something missing from this cheery festive scene. Instead of the usual clutch of Christmas cards jostling for space on my mantlepiece, there’s just a sad little space waiting forlornly to be filled.

By now I would have expected a good haul of snowy scenes and jolly Santas to be falling over each other on the shelf; 20 on a good year by mid-December, rising to a healthy 40 by Christmas Eve. Instead, there’s only a rather desolate foursome of cards, each looking a bit ‘pea on a shovel’ with too much white space in between.

After years of hints – the undeniable drop-off in numbers, the sad little e-cards in my inbox – even a traditionalist like me must begin to recognise that Christmas cards may have finally had their day. With that comes the realisation that if I’m hardly receiving any, then it’s probably time to stop sending them too.

But, at 50, I’ll put away my pen with a heavy heart, having sent Christmas cards to all my friends for a quarter of a century. Superfluous though they may be in this digital day and age, that is what makes them such an unexpected pleasure.

In recent years I have already resorted to only writing cards to those who sent them to us the previous year, so it’s probably only 25 that go in the post, with another 20 put through local letterboxes. A decade ago, the list was much longer, sending to everyone my husband, Graham, and I had invited to our wedding 19 years ago, plus new friends made since. But the annual silence I got from many in return made me feel a bit of a mug, so I now only send cards to those who do the same.

The eye-watering cost of stamps, coupled with the fact that I keep in contact with friends via social media all year round, means that pushing a chunky pile of cards into the post box is no longer as satisfying as it once was. Also, the festive Grinch in me can’t help questioning why I should spend hours scribbling away to meet the last posting date when hardly anyone else I know seems to do the same.

For all those reasons, 2024 will be the last year that I sit down with a glass of red to write festive messages en masse. A few may still get Christmas cards – especially older friends and relatives who I know it’s particularly important to – but others will have to find something else to fill their mantlepiece.

Many already have. According to figures published by John Lewis this week, sales of boxed cards are down 23 per cent and individual cards down 15 per cent. Doubtless this is related to the price of a first class stamp rising to £1.65 - and the 85p cost of second class postage.

But the card industry insists there are rays of light. According to the Greetings Card Association, we sent 91.5 million individual ‘single’ Christmas cards in 2023, excluding packs and boxes, spending £178m – an increase of £11m compared with the previous year. What’s more, their members’ polling suggests that it’s the younger generation that seems keen to keep the traditional alive. Figures from Hallmark found 63 per cent of 18 to 35 year olds planned to send more Christmas cards this year than last, compared to 38 per cent of those aged 55 and over.

Amanda Fergusson, CEO of the Greeting Cards Association, says: “It [sending cards] is definitely not a dying tradition. It’s a changing one. We’re seeing people put more effort into choosing individual cards for people they love and spending more on them.”

She is heartened that a significant number of millennials and older Gen Z-ers, those in their 20s and 30s, are buying cards, reflecting perhaps a wider trend towards a return to touchable analogue items like vinyl records and fancy notebooks.

“In this world of social media and electronic messages, cards become a very personal, meaningful connection. They are a tangible way of keeping in touch at a time when we are probably in many ways more physically isolated than we’ve been before.”

The British, says Fergusson, send more cards than anywhere else in the world, with the industry raking in £1.5 billion for the economy. “We may be quite reserved, but give us a pen and paper and we’re away.”

She is heartened by a Saga survey, which suggests that 94 per cent of its customers still send Christmas cards, but as head of the trade body for the card industry, she isn’t blind to the challenges.

The Greetings Card Association has been vocal about the rising cost of first class stamps – there have been five prices rises in the past three years – and is campaigning against plans to reduce second class deliveries.

“You can’t put a text message on the mantelpiece,” Fergusson adds. “Christmas cards are part of the decorations.” As my glaringly empty mantlepiece shows, she’s not wrong.

One of my big concerns if I stop sending Christmas cards is the festive kick in the teeth I’ll be delivering to charities. Every year I send cards that raise money for different causes. In 2024 my festive buck has gone to the RNLI, thinking of my father, Roger, who was a keen sailor.

While there is often debate about the proportion of Christmas card sales that charities actually receive, figures do suggest that sales at this time of year remain important to them.

Cards for Good Causes, which sells charity cards all year round, reports that in the past 10 years it has given £22.5m back to charities and £2.7m to local communities, raised during the Christmas period.

And many people, especially the elderly or isolated, rely on receiving them. While no one is pretending that cards can replace a real conversation, they are a way of connecting with others.

These are all good reasons to keep sending cards, but are they enough? After all, there are plenty of other ways to keep in touch, that don’t take a hefty chunk out of our already squeezed Christmas budgets, and there are other ways to support charities throughout the year. I also have to admit that writing “Happy Christmas” in 50 cards does not make me a better person. Lots of my friends who ditched the tradition long ago show their kindness in many other lovely ways throughout the year.

As a traditionalist at heart, the lopping off of another festive custom is not something for me to celebrate. But I fear this will be the last time I’ll be racing to write my cards before the last posting day. That’s Wednesday, for second class, in case you care.