22 Outdated Habits From Our Grandparents That Would Cause An Uproar Today
Oh, grandparents, we tolerate their loud, wild, and sometimes unpleasant behaviors and attribute them to their age.
But when they use the phrase "back in my day," we must mentally prepare ourselves for anything they might say. Because back in the day, things our grandparents did without a second thought can now be seen as not okay, since times have changed.
So, I asked members of the BuzzFeed Community, "Tell us which things grandparents used to get away with that would be unacceptable today." Here's what they said:
1."My grandma was very religious, so anytime I visited, I had to go to her church or my grandpa’s church. Yup, they went to different churches. My grandma went to a rather unhinged mega Methodist church every Sunday and Wednesday. She devoted a lot of her free social time to it. My grandpa sometimes went to a Lutheran church. It drove her crazy, and he didn’t like to go that much. I usually went to his church because the priest liked to engage with the kids in funny ways. It’s really amusing looking back because she would always soap-box preach about the importance of religion but also tolerated pretty much everyone else slacking on it. She also didn’t care what denomination it was as long as you went to a church. Anyway, I get the impression that today, a lot of parents would be quite upset at a grandparent trying to get their kid involved in their church."
2."Pinching the chubby cheeks like quarters are gonna fall out."
3."I used to stay the night at my grandparents' house a lot, and my Bebop used to think it was hilarious to wake me up by pulling the covers over my head and sitting on me until I started screaming. It was just a funny grandpa prank, and he never meant any harm, but in hindsight, I think it’s why I’m a bit claustrophobic now. I loved my Bebop, and I miss him, but I think that nowadays, grandparents are better at acknowledging that little kids are sensitive and impressionable."
4."My Grandpa used a water pistol to keep birds and squirrels off the plants and seeds in his garden…it would be more effective if it just missed the target rather than a direct hit, but today, he’d probably get in trouble for animal cruelty."
5."I used to sit right between my grandparents while they smoked cigarettes. Grandma and I also used to sit around and drink Sanka and watch old TV shows starting when I was 3 years old (maybe younger?)"
6."My grandfather used to take my brother and me to stock car races in Iowa. He would drop us off in a field outside the track, and we would have to cross the field and climb through a hole in the fence to get inside the track. This was so he wouldn’t have to pay our admission."
7."My Portuguese-American grandfather was a no-nonsense WWII vet and a former boxer. One time, he was walking through the neighborhood with my dad when an Italian man with some kind of beef started yelling at my grandfather. He told the man that if he didn't stop, he'd hit him. He threw in some choice racist words, as well. The Italian man didn't stop, so my grandfather hit him. Hard. The man fell backward over his fence, and my dad and grandfather walked away. No cops were called. It was just the regular neighborhood squabbling of the era. He also used to own a successful butcher shop and had a lot of fun telling irate customers to get the fuck out of his store and never come back. Neither of these things would ever happen today."
8."Cutting all the grandkids' hair, regardless of whether you managed it. Shorter hair is easier to manage; none of us had issues combing it. Our grandmother assumed, but our parents still let us go over for years until we all revolted and stopped. There's nothing like going to school in the '80s and your peers think you're the opposite gender or worse, have a health issue."
9."Longer hair was coveted and my grandma pretty much forbade my mother from letting us cut it. In sixth grade, I couldn't take it anymore and begged my mom to chop it off (it was down past my butt at that point), and she did. I cut it up to my ears, and my grandma didn't speak to me or my mother for three weeks because of that. How absolutely STUPID to not speak to a child for cutting her hair."
10."Forcing kids to hug or kiss. It always made me uncomfortable as a kid. I’m 47, and to this day, I’m not a fan of physical affection. I think it’s great that parents are starting to understand that their kids have the right to respectfully say no."
11."Sadly, forms of animal abuse. To keep a dog in line, they used fear and smacking in those days, and sometimes beatings. My grandma could not understand why we screamed at her to stop when she flicked my sister's dog's nose so hard that she yelped. She was just being a dog and sniffing around the trash and my grandma just up and flicked her like that. She would also smack my mom's dogs across the face when they got too close (goldens, for crying out loud, just being friendly) until my mom caught her and said if she did that again, she would be thrown in the worst old folks home that she could find and die alone. She stopped. It's very sad that animals were treated this way for just doing what they do, and I'm glad that more and more, it's being criminalized. Back in those days, no one blinked twice at a dog getting its ass whooped."
12.In response to the above: "My own mother is 66 and remembers neighborhoods full of dogs and cats; her own animals were popped by my grandparents, and so were her friends. It was widely acceptable to use fear, yelling, and your fist to control even your own children, so why on earth were dogs going to be any better?"
13."Not my grandparents, but my dad's. He tells me stories about when he was a teenager; they regularly drove around with a cracked beer. If they got pulled over, the cop would just say to pour it out and get home. That wouldn’t swing these days…nor should it."
14."What used to be accepted as regular discipline of children is actually literal child abuse. No, nana, hitting children with sticks is not okay."
15."My husband would give a list of all the things his parents hit him with; sticks, shoes, blind adjusters, and gallons of milk. If my husband raised any of that against our daughter, I swear I would divorce him on the spot."
16."Birthday spankings! You'd get one spank for every year you've been alive."
17."My grandparents used to send their eight kids (from ages 5 to about 12) to work in the fields all day, from 6 a.m. to whenever the sun went down. These days, this would result in a visit from the CPS, but back in the '50s, kids were expected to work all day, every day during summers and early autumn."
18."When I was 13 and my grandfather was 77, we took a trip to Disney World. He had already had a heart attack and a heart bypass surgery, and was diabetic at the time of this trip. Despite seeing multiple warning signs about safety concerns for people with heart problems or the elderly, he still did Splash Mountain, Space Mountain, Test Track, Tower of Terror, and Big Thunder Mountain with me. I have no idea how he lived to tell the tale, but he had a blast on that vacation and lived until he was 86. Oh, he was also the go-to chaperone for field trips and events at my elementary school. A man in his 70s was running around with 5-10-year-olds and having the time of his life."
19."Anything that would be dismissed with they’re just old or things were different for them. As a bisexual woman, I will not tolerate being told that it’s a phase. I will not accept being told that I’ll change my mind because all women want to have children and that I can’t do that with a woman. Fuck that. I will not have my grandparents’ age be an excuse for their ignorance. I have corrected their statements in the past, and I will continue to do so. I don’t care if things were different for them; this is how the world is now. If they won’t learn to change or be more accepting, I won’t interact with them."
—Anonymous
20."My grandpa used to steal bikes. Back before hotwiring cars was normal (they had not figured out how to hotwire cars and they weren’t as commonly hotwired), he would break into local universities and take their bikes. Just a couple of bikes off the rack, nothing too suspicious. He would wear a kind of school uniform, and because there were no security cameras, he never got caught. He would then take the trolley over to a nearby city (close but not too close) and sell them to students. He would switch schools between the two towns. His target demographic for people looking to buy his bikes? People who had had their bikes stolen."
21."My grandma would drive all the grandkids to the lake. There were nine of us, and it was a sedan. But honestly, the most unbelievable thing my grandparents got away with is that they got to retire, travel around the world, and live comfortably into their 80’s. I always considered traveling in retirement the ultimate goal; now I just hope I’ll be able to afford housing."
22."My grandma had nine grandchildren, and we were together ALL the time. It was the greatest. She was a badass who raised nine boys, was a full-time teacher, and went and got a second degree for fun. She was the queen of give zero fucks. However, some of her choices with us are a little problematic now that I think about it. She taught my cousin how to give people the finger when they drove past — she was about 6. She also used to let us take turns riding in the trunk while she drove, and she let us crawl into the front seat and shift the gears for her. There was also the time that my sister was suspended in kindergarten because my grandma snuck her a donut into school and told her to tell anyone who tried to take it from her to piss off. She died of ovarian cancer when I was 13, and it was devastating for all of us. I’m 36 now, and to this day, I think, 'what would Grandma do?' When trying to make a hard decision. I miss her every day."
Note: Some submissions have been edited for length/clarity.