Woman loves living in non-sexual threesome: 'My boyfriend's best friend even helps solve our arguments'

Lily, Alistair and Tom enjoying drinks as a non-sexual threesome. (Caters)
Lily, Alistair and Tom make for the perfect threesome at home, work and in their social lives. (Caters)

A woman has shared her experience of living in a non-sexual threesome with her boyfriend and his best friend, not to mention sharing businesses and booking joint holidays together.

Lily Brown has been in a relationship with boyfriend Alistair Moss for four years, ever since they met at university.

After they left, the couple moved in with Alistair's best pal Tom Doherty to save on rent, them all 23-years-old.

While this might not be entirely uncommon for young people, he has become far more than just a flatmate.

All these years later, Tom shows no signs of moving out of the home they all share in Lincoln – nor do Lily and Alistair want him to – and he even joins them on trips abroad and romantic meals out.

Rather than pining for their own space after a while, Lily says she loves having him around, with the couple even using him to referee when they bicker.

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Tom, Alistair and Lily at uni. (Caters)
The trio met at university and have been inseparable since. (Caters)

"Life would be so different without Tom, he's so funny and makes us laugh so much. We are all best friends, and we trust each other with everything," says Lily dotingly.

"As a trio we spend pretty much 24/7 together as we not only live together but work together too. As best friends we also love to go out and have fun together."

And those around them have grown used to expecting them as a package.

"All our friends and family love our friendship as it's so rare and wholesome at the same time. When one of us isn't at an occasion, someone is bound to ask where the third one is," explains Lily.

That said, some do wonder about just how harmonious living with your boyfriend and his best friend can really be.

"People ask if I get fed up having Tom around all the time, but I love it, and it doesn't feel as though we're living in each other's pockets," she adds, though he is respectful to the couple's space when he needs to be.

"We've been out together as a trio on New Year's Eve; even though Alistair and I will want to have our moment as the clock strikes 12, it won't be awkward because we're not a big PDA couple," says Lily.

"Tom knows when to make himself scarce."

Tom, Lily and Alistair on a night out. (Caters)
The three run two businesses together. (Caters)

The three met in 2018 when studying at the University of Lincoln, all having lectures in the Business School, with Lily studying Events Management, and Alistair and Tom studying Sports Business Management.

Lily and Alistair got together quickly, with the boys also becoming best friends, and them soon all as thick as thieves – now not just under one roof, but running two businesses together, Get Legless, a party game company, and Vitmi, a vitamin patch company.

But they have a way of coping with constantly being around each other.

"We're all quite forthright people and don't beat about the bush, so if any of us is annoyed with the other, we just come out and say it," explains Lily.

"I have no problems telling Alistair he has annoyed me in front of Tom.

"Usually, we end up asking Tom who's in the right.

"He usually tries to keep out of it, but he does sometimes take one of our sides just to wind the other one up. Luckily, we don't argue often, and if we are having a real couple's argument, Tom always knows the right time to disappear to another room."

The cosy trio often enjoy nights out together. (Caters)
The cosy trio often enjoy nights out together. (Caters)

Lily and Alistair do take themselves off for the night on their own occasionally, while the boys spend time together too, as do Lily and Tom, allowing room for some alone time each.

Lily says she and her boyfriend love running and playing tennis together, but as he hates watching the same kind of TV as her, she'll often sit with Tom instead and watch shows like I'm A Celeb and Love Island as a pair

And Alistair agrees that his best pal is an essential part of their trio. "Tom was my closest friend at University, we clicked straight away during a group activity and just instantly became best mates.

"I love living with him, he's definitely the funniest one out of the three of us and living together like this saves us a lot of money."

Thankfully, Tom is quite happy with their set-up too.

Read more: Married couple 'split house in two' to cope with living together after 20 years apart

Tom with Alistair and Lily. (Caters)
Even if Tom does move out, the couple don't want it to be further than next door. (Caters)

"I don't even feel like I live with a couple, I don't see them as that – they're just my best friends. It never feels too much being around each other 24/7– we know each other so well and have a great time always," he says.

"It also saves us a lot of money living together as we split rent and bills three ways. With the cost of living right now I couldn't afford to live on my own, so it works out for me."

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But as with everything, it's not always perfect.

Lily admits, "Like any business partners, and especially if you’re living together, you will have the odd arguments over irrelevant things such a cleaning. It can be difficult living with two boys, but it always gets resolved within a matter of hours!

"We are lucky enough to have an office where we run the businesses from, so if one of us wants to escape, we can head there as we have a mini bar, sofas and TV – it’s basically like another living room but a five-minute drive from the house."

Lily is aware that Tom might not always be under the same roof, but he will always be a part of the trio, just a stone's throw away.

“We know it won’t be forever, because Alistair and I will look for our own place when we get married – but even when the day does come that we move out, we don't want it to be any further than next door," she smiles.