Trying for a baby? Here’s one theory on how to conceive a girl
If you’re trying for a baby right now, then no doubt the number one thing in your mind will be the hope of having a happy and healthy child. However, there are some people who are desperate for their future little bundle of joy to be a baby girl.
In fact, a study by Mumsnet previously found that 45% of mothers desire a baby girl, while just 22% said they wanted a baby boy.
So, what gives? According to psychotherapist Heather Garbutt, who specialises in the effects of childhood experiences as repeat patterns in life, it can come about as a result of "a desire to redo your childhood," or to "give to your daughter what you didn’t have."
However, it can also be down to the subconscious feeling that you’d ‘perform better’ with a child of the same sex.
“We have a sense that we'll know what they need, because we know what we needed," the psychotherapist previously explained to Cosmopolitan UK.
Regardless of why you might want a baby girl or not, is there a way for us to influence the sex of our babies? Let's be clear - sex refers to the biological aspects of an individual as determined by their anatomy – although, as we all know, the sex you're assigned at birth doesn't always match your gender identity).
We spoke to Dr Fiona MacRae from the Marion Gluck Clinic to see if there’s anything we can do to ensure we have a baby girl…
How do I know when I’m ovulating?
First thing’s first, to help you actually be in with the best chance of having a baby of any sex, women need to know when we’re actually ovulating. This typically happens around 14 days before our next period.
Dr MacRae explains that your body can give us some clues about what stage of our cycle we’re in: “Basal body temperature usually rises between 0.5 -1 degree just after ovulation and regular temperature recording may helpfully detect this change.
“One in five women experience ovulation pain, which may be on either side of the lower abdomen.”
Dr MacRae also reveals that those hopeful to become mums should keep an eye on their discharge, which can change in appearance “to become clear, stretchy and likened to egg white” when we’re ovulating.
“Time of ovulation may be predicted using a period tracking app,” she adds. “Ovulation kits can be very effective in pinpointing the luteinizing hormone surge, which happens around two to three days before when your body is releasing a mature egg.”
Can we control whether we conceive a baby boy or girl?
Yes, there are highly expensive (and morally dubious) scientific ways to ensure and determine the sex of any of our children. However, back in the 1960s, an obstetric specialist, Dr Shettles, proposed a method of natural sex selection depending of the timing of when we had sex, in conjunction with the sexual position. Titled the Shettles Method, there have been some studies which do help the theory carry some weight - but whether it works (and whether we should even be considering these methods to conceive the preferred sex) has not been thoroughly proven.
What is the Shettles Method?
If you weren’t paying attention in double science back at school, our sex is genetically coded. All eggs are genetically coded with the female or ‘X’ chromosome. Sperm, on the other hand, are split between carrying the ‘X’ chromosome, or the male ‘Y’ chromosome.
For example, if an X sperm meets the X egg, then the baby will be a girl. If a Y sperm meets the X egg, the baby will be a boy.
Shettles theorised that X sperm and Y sperm functioned and behaved differently. He believed Y sperm are lighter, smaller, and have round heads. On the flip side, X sperm are heavier, larger, and have oval-shaped heads.
Because of this, he argued that X sperm thrived in different conditions which could be swayed to ensure you have a baby girl – theorising different sexual positions and even diet could make the womb more hospitable for female sperm.
What sexual positions favour X sperm?
“According to Shettles, the missionary position favours X-carrying sperm,” says Dr MacNae, explaining that positions that favour shallow penetration better suit ‘female’ sperm.
Why? Well, Shettles believed female sperm thrived better in the acidic vaginal environment. Shallow penetration means sperm have further to travel, which would wipe out the lighter Y carrying sperm.
How many days after ovulation should you have sex to conceive a girl?
Again, Shettles theorised that because X sperm are stronger and survive longer than Y sperm in acidic conditions, he argued you should have intercourse about 2 to 4 days before ovulation.
Shettles’s theory believes that, by the time ovulation would occur, only X sperm would have survived in the vagina’s acidic conditions, resulting in the conception of a baby girl.
However, Dr McNae does say having sex regularly and often will result in just conceiving generally.
“The highest pregnancy rates occur in couples having sex daily or every other day,” she says. “If this is not practical, then having sex a few times around the time of ovulation maximises the chances of becoming pregnant.”
What foods can you eat to favour X sperm?
Some scientists have theorised that a low sodium and high calcium intake is more likely to result in the conception of a baby girl.
One 2010 study found women who consumed a strict diet high in magnesium and calcium (along with timing intercourse) had a greater chance of conceiving a girl.
Foods rich in these ingredients include (but aren’t limited to) dark leafy greens, dairy, eggs, cashews and peanut butter.
But before you start chowing down on the spinach, Dr MacNae warns that a lot of these studies show quite slim evidence, and most have been conducted on animals: “It’s a matter of debate.”
Still, it won’t harm you to add more greens into your diet.
Is there any scienfitic research that backs up Dr Shettles’s theory?
Officially? Basically, no. The Shettles method was devised in the 1960s – which means there’s now nearly 60 years of newer, fresher scientific studies, and none have really backed up Shettles’s proposals.
“According to the American Society of Reproductive Medicine there is little evidence to support Shettles or any of the other theories of natural sex selection, using timing of intercourse, sexual position, or even dietary modifications,” Dr MacNae explains.
However, some of those who have tried the Shettles method do swear by it – despite there being no consistency in results, says Dr MacNae, which are reported between a 35 and 95% success rate.
There’s only one surefire way to have a baby girl, according to Dr MacNae: “The only reliable method for determining sex of offspring is by in vitro sperm sorting prior to artificial insemination or by preimplantation genetic diagnosis, where only embryos of the desired sex are returned to the uterus.”
Gender selection in the UK is illegal, unless in special circumstances: people are allowed to choose the sex of their IVF babies only if there is a good medical reason. For example, sex may be selected if there is a risk of a sex-related genetic defect such as Duchenne muscular dystrophy, which affects only boys.
This article is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice or diagnosis. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition.
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