Transport etiquette rules that must never be broken in the heat

Alice Sholl
·Contributor
Bus
Hell in its truest form [Photo: Pexels]

You’ve just made it onto the train after sprinting for 10 minutes only to remember that during a heatwave here in UK, it’s even hotter in the train than outside of it.

It may only happen for a few days a year, but this doesn’t make the fact that you’re stuck in this furnace for another 40 minutes any easier.

And even worse, you’re stuck with other passengers.

Because despite the fact you’re all in it together, far too many users of buses, trains and trams put it on themselves to make your journey as hellish as possible by not adhering to a few basic rules.

No hot fast food

Chips
Eating it straight from the bag doesn’t make it okay [Photo: Pexels]

Whoever chose to buy a Chicken Zinger before boarding – instead of a hoisin duck wrap, like any decent human being would have done – deserves to be punished.

Bringing one of those on a hot, busy train carriage is like popping into a sauna and replacing the coals with popcorn chicken; it won’t make you any friends.

The stench is unimaginable, making you weirdly hungry despite your heat-induced nausea, which is arguably even worse.

Keep your shoes on

Shoes
Never a sight you want to spot on the last off-peak train out of Paddington [Photo: Pexels]

If think that giving your feet a breath of fresh air is worth making 20 other people feel like they’re on a visit to the Saint Agur headquarters, you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.

Keep them on your feet. Don’t even have the nerve to untie them; your stewing toes will just have to wait just like the rest of ours.

No manspreading

spreading
Unacceptable at all times of year [Photo: Getty]

Manspreading (sorry, guys, but we’re looking at you) is bad enough at the best of times, but at above twenty degrees, insufferable.

As someone’s entire leg swings right into your space, you’re clenching your legs together so hard in an effort not to touch them a microclimate is beginning to develop between your sweaty thighs.

Don’t lean on the poles

Public transport
The poles are there to hold onto, with one hand [Photo: Pexels]

You know what’s worse than grabbing a pole on the Tube only to touch the remains of someone else’s hand sweat?

Touching someone else’s entire body sweat.

Leaning on poles and taking up all of the room is never acceptable (do some people just love watching each other fall over?) but when absolutely everything and everyone is sticking together, we really don’t want someone’s back sweat added into the mix.

Keep your top on

Man
Well done, sir [Photo: Pexels]

Speaking of back sweat – if you’re someone who’s relatively short, ever been stuck in a topless man’s sweaty armpit before?

Yes, it’s hot and yes, all of us are nail-bitingly impatient to get home and throw off all of our clothes too.

But be patient and wait until it’s your stop, hmm?

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