Selfie zombies have made Europe's cities a no-go zone

I don’t really enjoy city breaks any more. Since the advent of cheap flights, I’ve gorged on weekends in Venice, Paris and Prague, but now I long for peaceful surroundings: quiet Greek islands and Umbrian villages.

Perhaps it is a symptom of age. The wrong side of 35, I simply can’t keep up with the pace of urban life. More than that, however, I believe it is because I can no longer bear the sight of so many narcissistic tourists.

A thousand theses could be written on the scourge of the selfie and the egotistical culture it epitomises. Yet far from being lambasted, some want to celebrate its influence on society – today has even been declared National Selfie Day, for pity’s sake. Precious few places are free from its grip, but nowhere is a person more overwhelmed by the selfie brigade than on a city break.

Visit a major attraction in any European city and they will be everywhere – gurning, snapping, assessing the results and returning for more. So alarming are their antics that they genuinely detract from the enjoyment of sightseeing.

Even art galleries are not immune. On a visit to the Uffizi, I couldn’t get close to Botticelli’s The Birth of Venus because the crowds were six deep. But hardly anyone was there to admire the artwork. They were facing in the opposite direction, trying to get the perfect shot of themselves – with Botticelli’s masterpiece poking over their shoulder. Having succeeded, they didn’t pause to actually examine any brushstrokes, but dashed off in search of Primavera, Venus of Urbino, or whichever painting was next on their checklist.

I just don’t get it. Why would you want your face in every photo, and not a shot of the place you’ve come to see? Better still, why not put the phone down for a moment and try soaking up your setting?

In search of answers, I sought the opinions of wiser people than myself.

“I’m always mesmerised by the vanity,” says Sophie Campbell, a Blue Badge guide who’s shown more than her fair share of tourists around London. “I guess I’m from a generation where showing off was swiftly snuffed out, so I’m always embarrassed by these displays: the artfully cocked head and the sucked-in cheeks.

“When they first arrived, I imagined that selfies would quickly become uncool. But the appetite for them seems undiminished.”

Taking photos of our holidays is nothing new, she adds – “remember those awful slideshows we had to sit through when people came back from somewhere” – but the focus is now on the person, with the destination merely a backdrop.

“It’s social media that’s made the difference, and selfies are an extension of that,” says Sophie. “People seem to be living their lives through the lens of social and they’ve got to look good and do interesting things.”

To an extent, I can understand this desire to brag, and I am certainly not free from guilt. I enjoy recounting my adventures to friends, and I take photos too – some of which I will share on Instagram. But it’s beautiful places I showcase, not my own ugly mug.

“It infuriates me too,” says Simon Parker, a regular contributor to Telegraph Travel. “It’s not just selfies, it’s people randomly posing in front of things, as if to prove they were there.”

He adds: “I think it all taps into our narcissistic modern age. We are obsessed with our own faces.”

Is the urge to publish holiday selfies a sign of insecurity, Simon wonders. “Perhaps, subconsciously, we’re hijacking that famous place to make ourselves appear a bit more beautiful, learned, sophisticated or cultured than we really are. By placing yourself, visually, in the context of a recognisable destination, you’re saying: ‘I’m not at work. I’m living my best life. I’m living a more expansive and enjoyable life than you are’.” .

This desire to brag is clearly strong, and people are willing to take risks for the perfect photo. Recent years have seen dozens of selfie-related deaths in locations including Yosemite and Plitvice Lakes National Park.

Perhaps I should feel pity, and not irritation, for those who live their lives – and holidays –through the social media prism. I’m able to switch off and breathe in my surroundings, without the need to prove anything. They pick their holiday based on how Instagrammable it is, and can’t go 20 minutes without snapping their own features.

But I can’t – they are just too annoying.

Rob Crossan, another contributor to Telegraph Travel, thinks I’m a “po-faced Luddite”. He argues: “What is the one thing everyone always does in a travel selfie? Yep. Smile. Berate the selfie and you’re berating instant, harmless happiness. So lighten up. And stretch out that forearm.”

As long as it irritates me, and impinges on my enjoyment, I’d question whether it is “harmless” – and if it involves a selfie stick, danger is definitely lurking.

“Have selfies ruined European cities? I wouldn’t perhaps go that far, but I know selfie sticks are dangerous,” concludes Simon Parker. “Just last week I almost got trampled by a scrum of selfie stick-wielding tourists in Oxford. All of them were walking, with their phones about three feet ahead of them, watching themselves on the screens! Like a real time iPhone movie of themselves. The world has gone mad!”

And this Luddite has just added Oxford to his list of cities to avoid.

What do you think about selfies? Are they a harmless form of self expression? Or a symptom of 21st-century self-obsession? Comment below to join the conversation.