There’s been some serious mirth and merriment spread this April Fools’ day. From floral paint to the first female Bond, here’s some of our faves.
Daily Mail - Olivia Colman to play new James Bond
The Daily Mail really went for it today, “exclusively” outing Olivia Colman as the first female Bond.
Olivia supposedly “won the role after impressing producer Barbara Broccoli with her portrayal of spymaster Angela Burr in BBC1’s The Night Manager, which ended on Sunday.”
Broccoli is a totally legit surname.
[Photo: Action Press/REX/Shutterstock]
Hipster Air - “If you like it then we probably won’t”
Jokers over at The Frank Trophy Cabinet created “Hipster Air”, the vision of “kimchi entrepreneur Friday Lopalso.”
The “exclusive boutique airline” boasts inflight artisanal food (written on a chalk board menu), generous hand baggage allowance (provided passengers carry a single Fjallraven Kanken rucksack), and only one class - middle.
[Photo: The Frank Trophy Cabinet]
HONDA - Emoji license plates
The car company today unveiled “plans” to introduce the world’s first official emoji number plate on the Honda Civic Type R.
Imagine that in a police chase scenario.
U.S. Army - scientists successfully “teleport” Soldiers
In a statement released on the U.S. Army website claims were made to have successfully “teleported” “a fully equipped squad from a Massachusetts research and development facility to a training area in Germany”.
Bath Store - “Silent Loo” app
“To protect the modesty of the nation whilst saving water” is the tagline of this ruse from the folk at Bathstore.
The “silent loo” app negates the need to run taps in order to drown out embarrassing poop noises. From “shower” to “Costa Rican river”, there’s a sound effect for every poop on the Bristol Stool Chart, although the “Tsunami” setting’s “strictly for emergency use only”.
These pranksters have gone the whole hog and even made a hilarious promotional video.
Asos - Get married on the ASOS catwalk
ASOS likes released this little prank today: “ASOS is launching a full wedding package where you can get married on the ASOS catwalk.”
The “package” includes wedding ceremony, two male models to use as ushers, wedding outfits, flowers and photos.
Imagining this as a reality makes us feel a bit weird. A bit like getting hitched in someone’s office.
HBO - Kanye West Joins Cast of HBO’s Westworld
Premium television network HBO got sci-fi fans in a tiz this morning after announcing: “singer, songwriter and self-proclaimed God Kanye West will appear in HBO’s upcoming sci-fi thriller, Westworld.”
Read the full article in all it’s hilarity here.
University of Surrey - “Leap years to be scrapped after Surrey scientists discover Earth’s orbit has slowed.”
Mad props to the University of Surrey for this time-bending jape championed by Professor Jim Al-Khalili OBE.
In a video accompanying the article published by the university, Jim explains “excessive solar activity has caused the sun to reduce in size” resulting in the Earth taking “slightly longer to orbit the sun. This means a slight recalibration to how time is measured on Earth”.
How to get out of this quandary? Replace Greenwich Mean Time (GMT) with Global Extra Time (GET). “Every hour will now be approximately four seconds longer.”
The article says “New GET standard will eradicate the need for leap years after 2016.”
(Insert crying with laughter emoji here)
[Photo: University of Surrey]
Ultimo - “Cleavage Spy Bra”
Lingerie label Ultimo waged a fake war against peeping Toms with this item of “smart” clothing.
The “cleavage spy bra” features a blue tooth camera with facial recognition that works through clothing. If someone’s gaze meets your baps for more than three seconds their image is pushed to your smartphone.
The only thing this bra supports is the most awkward confrontation ever.
Cath Kidston - Floral paint
The Cath Kidston kept it twee with their April Fools’ joke this year offering paint that promises their signature floral bursts.
[Photo: Cath Kidston]