"The Night Before This Wedding, He Told Me That 'He Never Wanted Children'": 24 Brutal Family Secrets People Were Told Against Their Will

We have all had a moment when someone suddenly dropped a bombshell we never saw coming. Whether it’s a confession, a personal revelation, or a family secret, some truths are just too shocking to forget, even when we wish we could. We recently shared some of the most shocking truths the BuzzFeed Community heard, which they regretted hearing. The response to their confessions was overwhelming, with people sharing even more stories — so here are 24 more dark truths people couldn't bear to hear:

1."When I was about 15, I was babysitting two young girls. The older one was brilliant. She had left the playroom we were in supposedly to use the bathroom. When she returned, she was carrying a photo album. She opened it and asked me who was in the picture. Well, the two girls had a much older sister who, it turns out, was from their father's previous marriage. They didn't know this; the picture was of him with another woman holding a baby. I told them I didn't know and they would have to ask their parents. I also told her she shouldn't have been in her parent's room. I never babysat for them again. I believe she knew something and just wanted the truth. I don't know if they talked to them about it or not. I did tell them what had occurred. They were good people and probably didn't think the girls were old enough to understand."

—anonymous

2."My mother stated on the day of my father's death: 'You have no one to protect you now,' knowing that I loved and respected him. She told me how she loved me but didn't like me throughout my life. I am now 76 and flourishing. She has been gone for 20 years, but I can still hear her voice. But she doesn't control me anymore."

—Jody, 76, Florida

3."When I joined the army at 19, I needed to submit my medical records because of a heart murmur caused by a childhood disease. I ended up getting the records of my whole family. There, in my family doctor's handwriting, was the story of how my mother, apparently suffering from postpartum depression, put a loaded gun to my head and pulled the trigger. A misfire miraculously saved me. She was involuntarily placed in a mental hospital for about six months while I lived with another family. My father had told me about this when I was younger, but I didn’t believe him as he was known for being unreliable when it came to truth-telling. I’ve never spoken to her about this and likely never will as she is about to turn 89."

4."My parents told me I was adopted when I was 7. Even as a kid, I didn’t think much of it. But when I was 13, my mom told me that my sperm donor was her brother (my uncle) and that my grandpa had given my egg donor money for an abortion. My egg donor drove out of state to get an abortion, but when she got there, she went shopping with the money instead. My grandpa was like a second father to me, so for 20 years, I’ve had to grapple with the fact that I was so unwanted by my grandfather that aborting me was the only option."

—anonymous

5."In college, I found out I have an identical twin sister who also went to the same school (we look similar but not completely alike). I hadn't put it together even when we had class together, and she hinted we had the same biological parents, drawing sperm on her notebook and reenacting an egg cracking with a plastic Easter egg. I found out who she was because she told classmates about it, and we had classes together. I had a huge crush on her, which I'm still embarrassed to this day about."

6."That I was supposedly the 'wanted child' unlike my older sister, who our mother resented giving birth to at 19. When my sister was three, our parents decided to try for a second child, a boy, so that our dad could pass down the family name and our mother could shut him up so she could get her tubes tied. Well, nearly nine months later, instead of that son, she gave me a baby girl who had survived both my umbilical cord getting wrapped around my neck at birth and nearly getting my skull crushed with forceps (I was supposed to be a breech birth, but had turned in the birth canal). Thus, not only being the 'wrong' gender and the reason, our biohazard of a mother had to suffer through a third pregnancy and difficult delivery.'"

7."My father, who was verbally and physically abusive to his daughters and very controlling, was thought to be the epitome of a great person, but he was not. He cheated and lied to our mother, who actually forgave him over the years. He had 5 grandchildren, but one was his favorite, and he left her everything and the others nothing. It's a trust fund with over a million dollars in it. No one knows that I know about it."

—Anonymous

8."My mother told me that after I was born, having a baby was not what she expected. She said that when I was just a few weeks old, she tried to smother me with a pillow to stop my crying, but the phone rang. She took that as a sign and told my father that he needed to hire a nanny to help take care of me."

"They hired a young live-in nanny, and my mother went back to her life of being out all day and going away for the weekends. After a while, the neighbors came over to tell her that the nanny would leave every morning after she and my father left and not come home until right before they did. I was left alone all day, just screaming in my crib. It's not like my mother told me because she was sad or apologetic; it's more like she was just mad that the girl they hired would go see her boyfriend every day. I have never had a good relationship with her, but I really didn't need to hear that one, she tried to kill me, and two, I was neglected and abandoned by my caretaker."

—Anonymous

9."My mother-in-law told me that she had a child in high school that she gave up for adoption but forbade me from ever telling my husband or anyone else. I hadn't asked; she freely volunteered this information to me and demanded I never tell anyone. She is now 74 and still refuses to tell anyone herself. My husband is the only one of her kids who hasn’t found out (they are not an open/communicative family), and I’m infuriated that she put the burden of this secret on my shoulders with such nonchalance. If I tell her secret, I worry I'll be 'responsible' for destroying her facade of family life, and if my husband finds out that I’ve known this information for so long without telling him, it will destroy his trust in me. Hiding her secret has been eating me up inside, but I’m screwed if I say anything."

10."When I started dating my now wife, she told me she was resolved to be a virgin until marriage. Before we got married, she took a teaching job in another state, and we continued our relationship but knew we would be dating others too. She told me about this guy she was dating after two months away. I asked her if this relationship had become more serious than ours. She said, 'No, I am still a virgin.'"

"We got engaged a few months later as I was worried I might lose her. She never hesitated when I asked her to marry me. A year into our marriage, she said she was feeling guilty about something and had to share it with me. She said she lost her virginity to this other man and had had sex on two occasions. I had seen her between these two occasions, and she still said she was saving herself for marriage.

Learning about her lie has caused me almost constant depression. We have stayed together, but I've lost the love and closeness I once felt with her. I don't understand why she would choose to tell me. I had believed her completely. She has never understood why I still feel ill when thinking about it."

—Anonymous

11."My favorite uncle was very abusive to my aunt. Apparently, he cheated on her more than once and was abusive to most of their kids. Later, once all of the kids were grown, he even burned my aunt's things, including some of her clothes and gifts she had been given. I chose our wedding rings based on theirs. I thought they had a good marriage."

"I served as guardian to my uncle because none of his remaining kids could or would. I took care of his finances and him while he was in the nursing home. My aunt was my biological relative, and I was much closer to her than him, but I did this for her memory, too. I don't think I would have taken as good care of him or even done it had I known."

—Anonymous

12."My long-time friend of 14 years kissed me and said it was 100% bound to happen since we already had a deeper connection. I regret hearing this since we're currently in relationships with different people, stuck with unhappy partners who mistreat us."

13."When I was 16, my cousin and her fiancé took me to a local park to take photos. On the drive there (while smoking with me in the car), the fiancé told me that his family had shunned him because he had offered to be his teenage niece's 'first' because he wanted it be with someone who would treat her right."

"In his mind, he was being gallant, or at least that’s how he portrayed it, and he was appalled when his brother freaked out on him. My cousin was clearly under his abusive influence and was agreeing with him. I was stunned, but being a shy teenager stuck in the car with these two adults, I couldn’t do anything but give 'oh' and 'mmhm' responses. I didn’t know what to do or how to tell anyone else, but I didn’t need to because literally everyone in and out of the family easily picked up on his creepy vibes. I don't keep in touch, but I hope my cousin divorced him."

—Anonymous

14."My parents got divorced when I was four because my father cheated on my mother in the new house they were building for their growing family (three kids). It was a huge mess that never let up. But when I was maybe eight or nine, and I was with my dad for a week's vacation in the summer while my mother was on a trip, he brought me to my mom's house (the one they had built together and he had barely even lived in) and had me climb through a window."

"I unlocked the garage door for him, and he entered the house. I don't know what he did when he was inside. I didn't tell my mom until I was an adult out of fear that she'd blame me since I was the small one who fit through a basement window and let my dad into the house."

—problematik

15."Mum died of complications from lupus when I was 16. My father, who was a very 'hands-off' parent, was suddenly stuck with a teenager he didn’t want. On the day of Mom’s funeral, I think I saw him twice. As soon as the coffin was lowered, I was sent away again. Back at the house, any trace of my real mother was wiped away. Even saying her name resulted in abuse. Fast forward 2 years, he was engaged to another woman. He had a perfect life, and I didn’t fit this new storybook world he created; I was just an inconvenient reminder of his 'heartbreaking, tragic loss'."

16."I come from a huge extended family, and one thing that can get jumbled sometimes is the grandkid birth order (who is older than who), so it's a game to keep it straight. I was talking with an aunt about how I was the seventh oldest grandchild since I was younger than her son, born in the same year as me, when she replied, 'Technically, you're the sixth because Milly isn't Uncle John's.' My jaw dropped, but she kept talking. 'Yeah, Aunt Jen was pregnant with Milly when she met Uncle John, and they married shortly before Milly was born."

"Grandma and Grandpa always treated her as one of the grandkids. I must have still looked confused because she asked, “Didn’t your mom tell you?” I was speechless. It doesn’t change my feelings for my cousin, though; she’s been my favorite cousin since I was little, and she still is today. But I could have done without learning that family secret."

—Anonymous

17."My sister-in-law and her husband were on the outs when she fell pregnant. She knew the baby was not his, so she got with him when she was barely 7 weeks along. She would never let him see the information on the ultrasounds, where they put the gestation of the baby. Her OB-GYN was a family friend and was in on the scam, so when the baby was born 'a month early' but looked like a healthy, full-term baby, it was explained away as a 'miracle.' My sister-in-law eventually divorced and remarried. Her son (who is the sweetest, smartest, most wonderful human) is now 22 years old and does not know anything. We will go to the grave with this because he has a good relationship with his supposed father, and none of us wants to break his precious heart."

—Anonymous

18."My parents' marriage hasn't been the greatest. I guessed long ago that the love had died, but there seemed to be a solid partnership, and they were always a united front when it came to big family or parenting decisions. They're both over 70 now and have both been coming to me individually to tell me about various conversations, fights, fears, suspicions, etc., about the other one. It's stressing me out because no child at any age should be the referee for their parent's marriage, but I can tell they have no one else to tell these things to, and I will not be sharing any of it with the other one. I usually get both their points of view on the same events, and it's WILD to hear such different viewpoints. I wish I hadn't heard certain things."

19."I went to college with a girl who admitted to having her 'aunt,' the woman she babysat for, file a false police report saying a young girl stole a leather coat from her while babysitting the 'aunt's' children, just for petty revenge. My college friend hated the girl when they were in high school, but she sounded jealous and just plain mean. I asked why the 'aunt' would do this to an innocent teenager, and she said she knew where the skeletons were buried."

"She laughed when she said the innocent girl had an airtight alibi that wouldn’t help her because the judge was a friend of the ‘aunts’ family. It was unbelievable corruption for sport. I felt sick for that innocent teenage girl. She didn’t know anything or anyone and was found guilty by a corrupt group of people who thought it was funny. I couldn’t even report anything because she didn’t mention names. I was afraid to ask for more information in case she decided to file false charges against me. I was not friends with her for long after that confession. I wish I could have helped that girl and often wonder how she is almost 40 years later."

—Anonymous

20."I'm autistic and an advocate for autistic adults such as myself. One day, I learned of something harmful from Autism Speaks directed at neurodivergent parents. I told my mom, and she said, 'When you have a special needs child, you mourn the person they would become.' I am hurt that she mourns me even though I'm wonderful."

—Anonymous

21."When I broke up with my ex, my sister and I were talking about it over text message, and she said, 'I always wondered how he managed to be in a relationship with you, given all your difficulties.' I didn't say anything back because I was too shocked and hurt. I started spiraling and wondering if everyone around me thought that. It turns out that she didn't quite mean that, at least not in that way, and she was apparently deeply upset about saying it, but she has never apologized to me, and to this day, it's one of the worst things anyone has ever said to me. True or not, I could have done without her sharing that thought."

22."My grandmother's fourth child was from her abusive husband’s brother. She had 3 more sons from her husband, then lived with her brother-in-law, the father of her fourth child, after her husband died of a drug overdose."

—Anonymous

23."My dad recently admitted that he wasn't sure if I was biologically his until he saw a picture of his father's grandmother, and I looked like her. He also told me that my mother had had two abortions: one before my older brother was born (before they were married) and the second after I was born. My mom will never know that I know about them or that she had multiple affairs during her marriage to my father."

24."After I found out my ex, who I had been long-distance dating for nearly two years, was cheating on me, my mom picked me up from college for the day so I could clear my head a bit. As I was reeling from the future I'd been planning to go up in smoke; she decided that was the perfect time to tell 20-year-old me about the time my dad cheated on her (with a man, no less) when they had two young children before I was born."

"That was the day I found out my staunchly conservative, deeply religious, emotionally abusive father is deeply closeted, with my mother saying she's never once worried about my dad cheating on her with another woman. She also shared how he's gotten hit on over the years by gay men since then. Instead of getting any comfort for my broken heart that day, my mother used the situation to put yet another family secret I never wanted to know on my shoulders. She then told me I wasn't allowed to tell anyone once she finished sharing all the gory details about my dad's affair and how she took him back after calling their pastor about it. I don't know why she felt the need to share all of that when I already said I was dumping my cheating ex."

^—Anonymous

Have you ever been told a truth you wish had been kept secret? Tell us about it in the comments. If you prefer to stay anonymous, submit your story to us via this form.

Note: Some submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.