Here’s What Oscars Fashion Looked Like in 1996

Remember when Brad and Gwyneth were a thing? Remember when you were nothing if you weren’t wearing a slipdress and coordinating wrap to a formal function? Remember when Gwyneth was still so green, she clutched said wrap with a death grip (smoke your weekly American Spirit and chill, Gwynnie)? Remember the halcyon, pre-Bennifer days when not every couple had to have a stupid, cutesy portmanteau like Bryneth or Gwad?

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A wrinkly brown ball gown and Matrix shades on the red carpet? Oh, yes, Susan Sarandon did — and we still love her for it.

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Halle Berry, the most beautiful woman in the world 1992 through present, proves she was no slouch in 1996.

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Seeing Mel Gibson at his peak, holding aloft his Braveheart Best Director Oscar, is like seeing a pic of your granddad when he was young and sort of hot. You know it’s the same guy but, like, how is that the same guy?

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Please never let her personal issues obscure the fact that Winona Ryder at her peak was an actual queen, especially in vintage beaded champagne silk and finger waves.

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How could Nicole Kidman look so bummed? … the world collectively asked itself in 1996. She’s wearing next-season Prada, and she’s married to Tom Cruise. Oh, Nic, if only we knew.

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Kate Winslet wears yet another dress-and-stole combo, this time in unexpectedly fetching fuchsia and red.

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This, ladies and gentlemen, was the year when Sharon Stone wore a $20 Gap turtleneck on the red carpet, accompanied by a long skirt and a big, white flower brooch (years before Carrie). A stunning high-low mix before high-low was even a thing.

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Couples you forgot existed, part two: Best Supporting Actress winner for Mighty Aphrodite Mira Sorvino, in a very Grace Kelly-ish look, and Quentin Tarantino.

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The late, great Joan Rivers proves that you can dress like a bed skirt and still dispense fashion critiques, as long as you’re armed with the greatest weapon of all: a sharp tongue.

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The gilded wrap was happening in 1996, and Oprah made it look smashing with her sweetheart neckline and Harry Winston jewels. Gaze upon her beauty in those innocent years before she foisted faux-doctors Oz and Phil upon us.

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Love Kevin Spacey’s choice of a more-formal-than-a-tux white dinner jacket here. It’s like he was already campaigning for the Bobby Darin role in Beyond the Sea.

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Pre-Scientology Will and Jada, RIP. Would they have made a pact with Xenu if they knew it’d mean answering for their kids’ latest megalomaniacal nonsense in the press forever?

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We think it’s super beautiful how Kurt and Goldie’s love has been going strong since 1983 and that she stuck with him through the dark years, when he bought pants at the big-and-tall store, despite being neither, and also had a mullet.

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Alicia Silverstone probably couldn’t get an Oscars invite these days, and that sad fact alone makes us want to boycott the whole affair. Except, nah — that Chris Rock monologue is probably going to be fire.

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