Louisa Johnson describes rehab stint as the 'most liberating experience' of her life
Louisa Johnson believes her stint in rehab was the most "painful" and "liberating" experience in her life.
The X Factor winner marked Mental Health Awareness Day in October by revealing on Instagram that she went to rehab for treatment for trauma, depression and anxiety earlier this year. In a new interview with The Sun, she explained that her therapist suggested it when her mental health battle reached crisis point around her 23rd birthday in January, when she "woke up and just didn't want to be here anymore."
"I wanted to try anything to get rid of feeling sad and s**t all the time. I was ticking along fine but I didn't want to 'tick along', I wanted to help myself, I wanted to live," she told the publication. "It sounded like such a bad thing and I was s**tting myself, but now I've been, I know it's not. It was the most life-changing, eye-opening, painful, liberating experience of my f**king life."
After being in rehab for two months, Louisa admitted she was worried about going home and being depressed again but the stint has given her the tools and techniques to cope with her mental health and she feels more in control of her life.
"I didn't come out of there thriving or feeling like a 'new woman'... It didn't 'fix' me, but it helps me in my everyday life and it's only now that I've realised that," she explained. "When life gets stressful, overwhelming and tough I'm no longer going back to the mindset of 'I can't do this anymore'. That's the biggest change."
Louisa began to suffer from depression a few months after she won The X Factor in December 2015 when she was only 17, and later started to experience frequent panic attacks. She started having therapy in 2019 and still goes regularly now.
"I haven't had a panic attack or gone to that dark place where I was before rehab and I'm so thankful," she shared. "I know it could happen again, but I'm prepared for it if it does, but for now I'm working on growing my confidence every day and it feels good."
