She breaks down some common misconceptions
From adapting during the pandemic to how to strengthen your team...
A new photobook by Chloe Dewe Mathews shows the dirty old river still serves as a conduit for spiritual and social connection, writes Eve Watling
"It's partly vanity and also it's the male gaze."
Instagram Stories suggest they took a trip together over the weekend 👀
To celebrate Bhanu Kapil’s triumphant anthology, ‘How to Wash a Heart’, we take a look at the victors from past years
We're not at all surprised people are trading in city life for country living
Netflix has confirmed the hit series will return
Tougher restrictions could soon be introduced for arrivals
By now, I never leave the house without a face mask. I even stash extras in my car, and at home I have a wide variety of coverings in different patterns and colours. Even so, I’ve never considered doubling up and wearing two masks at once — until I watched the US Presidential Inauguration on 20th January. Like me, you may have spotted several attendees and key speakers — including poet Amanda Gorman — wearing not one, but two masks. The first layer was often a white mask (that looked like it might be disposable), and the top layer was a cloth covering. Was this a fashion statement? Extra protection against what looked like a cold winter day? Or, with new, potentially more contagious strains of COVID-19 starting to spread, should we be strengthening our mask game? Some countries are changing their mask requirements with an eye on combating the new COVID-19 variants — though they’re not explicitly recommending double-masking. Germany is now requiring that people wear medical-grade face masks (like N95s or surgical masks) on public transit or to grocery stores, reports The Washington Post. France recently followed suit, mandating that people must wear medical-grade masks or fabric masks with “Category 1” specifications, which have been proven to block at least 90% of particles, in public places, according to CNN. That means many cloth masks won’t cut it in these countries. “We are not questioning the masks used up to now,” Daniel Camus, a member of the High Council of Public Health in France, told France’s public broadcaster. “But as we don’t have any new weapons against the new strains, the only thing we can do is to improve the weapons we already have.” To be clear: No one is saying cloth masks don’t work at all. They do offer significant protection against the spread of COVID-19. And in the UK, the NHS recommendations around wearing face masks haven’t changed: Wear a mask whenever you’re in public or around anyone who’s not a member of your household. The NHS isn’t yet recommending wearing two face masks. The agency does, however, recommend wearing a non-medical mask that’s made up of two to three layers of fabric and has inner filter pockets. And if your favourite mask has one layer, or if the fabric is getting thin (because you’ve washed it many times), Abisola Olulade, MD, a family medicine physician based in San Diego, says that wearing two masks at once might be a smart strategy. “If you have a face mask that’s thin, flimsy, falling apart, frayed, or if you put it up to a light and you see light coming through it, it might be helpful to wear another one on top of it,” she says. As long as wearing two doesn’t affect your breathing capabilities or fit painfully tightly, it could offer much-needed additional protection — especially if you’re in any enclosed areas where social distancing may not be possible, such as taxis, grocery stores, or hair salons. If she had to choose, Dr Olulade says that for now, she’d recommend wearing a single effective, two- or three-layered mask that’s been approved by the NHS over wearing two, single-layered or non-approved masks. But in all, so long as it doesn’t impair your breathing, there’s nothing wrong with doubling up — and doing so may offer a little more protection. Worth nothing: Unlike France or Germany, for now, the NHS isn’t recommending that everyone wear medical-grade masks in public — for a good reason. “Healthcare workers have a higher risk of exposure and they have more frequent exposure, and so the guidance now is you preserve [medical-grade masks] for healthcare workers because if people buy up surgical masks it may limit access to PPE,” Dr Olulade explains. These face mask guidelines may change, as they have before. No matter how many masks you’re wearing, though, it’s still important to socially distance from others, wash your hands often, and stay home and avoid public places as much as possible. We won’t be wearing masks forever — but we will be wearing them for a lot longer if we don’t continue to take the precautions that we know work. Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?I've Been Celibate For A Year Because Of COVIDWomen Are Doing More Unpaid Work Because Of CovidI'm 18 & Caught Coronavirus At University
As a beauty editor, I'm lucky enough to try hundreds of products so I like to think I've nailed how to sort the good from the not so good. But when it comes to achieving skin I'm personally happy with, it isn't solely about the cleansers, moisturisers and serums that line my #shelfie. I have combination skin, which is prone to oiliness (and subsequently the odd acne cluster), as well as drier patches exacerbated by winter weather. Over the years, I've discovered that it's the little tricks I've incorporated into my AM to PM routine which tend to keep my skin in check, and mostly they're quick, easy and affordable.From avoiding cleansing in the shower to getting rid of my eye cream stash, click through to discover six tweaks that helped me uncover my best skin ever. Refinery29's selection is purely editorial and independently chosen – we only feature items we love! As part of our business model we do work with affiliates; if you directly purchase something from a link on this article, we may earn a small amount of commission. Transparency is important to us at Refinery29, if you have any questions please reach out to us.While eye creams are great at smoothing over dry skin and temporarily plumping out fine lines and wrinkles, that's pretty much it. In fact, it's difficult to treat eye 'bags' and dark circles with an eye cream. "If dark circles are due to a loss of facial fat underneath the eye, then no amount of topical eye cream will reduce the appearance of the shadow which may develop," consultant dermatologist Dr Anjali Mahto recently told R29. "This is because treatments (such as eye creams, balms or lotions) are unable to penetrate deep enough into the skin," she adds. That hasn't stopped beauty brands launching countless luxury eye creams and thickly textured eye balms but, personally, all they've ever done is leave me with puffy lids in the morning or clog my pores, leading to milia (tiny white bumps underneath the surface of the skin, which resemble whiteheads). So I decided to ditch eye cream from my skincare routine to see if it would make a difference, and I was pleasantly surprised. Instead of completely overloading my skin and layering an eye cream under my face cream, I now simply apply my trusty moisturiser (currently the Humanrace Humidifying Cream) all over my lids, paying special attention to my under-eyes. Since doing so, I've had no trouble with puffiness or blocked pores and the skin around my eyes is still supple and soft. In other words, a good moisturiser is just as effective as eye cream. Look out for ingredients like ceramides (which repair dry, damaged skin) and hyaluronic acid for a hydrating boost. Of course, skincare is all about personal preference. For me, less is more, and that's definitely true for eye cream.Alpha hydroxy acids (or AHAs) are incredibly popular in skincare right now, especially glycolic and lactic acid. They exfoliate the surface of the skin, minimising hyperpigmentation, unclogging pores and smoothing uneven skin texture, and are loved by dermatologists and skin experts everywhere. But it's so easy to overdo it, leading to red, sore and sensitised skin. Since laying off AHAs and swapping them for beta hydroxy acids (BHAs, such as salicylic acid, which is a lot more gentle), my skin is a lot less red and reactive. BHAs are also better suited to nixing breakouts, specifically blackheads, as they exfoliate deep inside the pore to dislodge the oil and dirt that form them. I use Paula's Choice 2% BHA Liquid Exfoliant, £28, in the evening followed by moisturiser.If you don't want to give up AHAs just yet, your best bet is to incorporate them into your routine via a cleanser, rather than a leave-on toner or serum. As you'll be rinsing the product off, it'll be a lot less harsh on skin. Try Neighbourhood Botanicals Acid Washed Foaming Cleanser, £17, or Jan Marini Bioglycolic Face Cleanser, £38.If, like me, you take scorching hot showers, you probably try and get away with washing your face with the same water without adjusting the temperature. As a lazy girl, I'm entirely guilty of this. But very hot water can disrupt your skin barrier, potentially leading to red, dry and sometimes sore or sensitive skin. Up until now, I had experienced all of the above. Experts I've spoken to advise washing your face with slightly warm water, and it's a little easier to control the temperature of a bathroom sink tap. If you find that to be a bit of a faff, just remember to regulate your water in the shower when you go to cleanse your face. Honestly, your skin will thank you for it. I'd always wondered why more breakouts appeared on one side of my face in particular. Not many skin experts could give me a definitive answer but this makes sense: pillowcases are a breeding ground for dust, oil and bacteria, so changing yours regularly is especially important if you sleep on your front or side. While I don't really have a preference for cotton, silk (if you're feeling boujee) or any other material, I make sure to throw my pillowcase in the wash at least every two days. This has had a real positive effect on lessening spots. Yes, my hair. Thick oils and nourishing masks and conditioners can transform dull, dry hair, but it might be a good idea to keep them away from your face and hairline. "Heavy conditioners can trap bacteria and block pores and this is why they are a culprit for forehead acne," Dr Mahto recently told R29. "Conditioner is designed to hydrate older, more brittle hair and it often contains quite heavy ingredients such as petrolatum, jojoba oil, shea butter or other oil-based products." The solution? Concentrate thick hair products to your mid-lengths to ends, and if you're using conditioner in the shower, wash your face last to remove any residue. If you wear makeup and SPF every day, double cleansing in the evening (cleansing your skin twice) should eradicate every last scrap. This can help reduce clogged pores (which eventually lead to spots) and means any skincare you apply on top will do a much better job of absorbing and working. Some like to use a micellar water followed by a cleanser that should be used on damp skin, but you really don't have to use two separate products if you don't want to. I like the Florena Fermented Skincare Milky Face Cleanser, £14.99, or the CeraVe Hydrating Cleanser, £9.50, both of which cleanse skin gently. Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?Unlearning These 7 Bad Habits Transformed My HairHow To Get Clear Skin Fast, By A Top Beauty ExpertMy Skincare Routine Costs £30 & My Skin Is Glowing
“The ‘switch’ is quite unnerving. I could be carrying on quite normally at work or at home, and then a small thing will drastically alter my mood.” Twenty-three-year-old Shannon Vanderstreaten works in children’s residential care in the East Midlands and suspects she has cyclothymia, a form of bipolar disorder. While there are no numbers for cyclothymia, it is thought that 5% of the UK population is on the bipolar spectrum. Shannon doesn’t experience the extreme manic highs and depressive lows that she recognises from her mother’s own reckoning with manic depression (her mother prefers this term to bipolar) but she describes the experience of feeling “a switch going in my brain”. “I feel my mood still cycles and can switch quite violently, which is why I think cyclothymic disorder best describes what I might be experiencing.” Cyclothymia is a mood disorder that forms part of the bipolar spectrum of disorders. According to Molly, a peer support officer at Bipolar UK, it is referred to colloquially as ‘mild bipolar’, although the charity tries to avoid this terminology. “When we speak to people, we try really hard to emphasise that though those symptoms may be clinically mild, it doesn’t make them any less distressing for the person experiencing them.” This is important to understand not only so people take their own condition seriously but so that they can recognise when they do need to reach out for help. In a clinical context, ‘mild’ means that the mood changes from high mood to a middling mood (called a euthymic state) to a low mood, which is very similar to bipolar. Unlike bipolar, moods are not clinically severe enough to meet the category for mania or major depression. Instead of mania you experience the less intensive hypomania and the low mood is not so severe that it affects someone’s ability to function. “People with cyclothymia may still be able to maintain some of the tasks that they previously had,” says Molly, “things like work, relationships, etc. but they will still be impacted by those mood changes.” Sometimes, in some people, cyclothymia can be a precursor to bipolar disorder; other people maintain a mild level of symptoms throughout their life. It’s important to note that while the highs and lows are not as extreme as they can be in bipolar disorder, living with cyclothymia is still distinct from what people without a mood disorder understand as ‘mood swings’. People experience a wide range of emotions throughout their life but just as feeling sad for a few days if something unpleasant happens at work isn’t a form of clinical depression, neither does feeling excitable about good news for a week mean you’re experiencing hypomania. The key difference is the impact and duration of these mood shifts. “When clinicians are looking at making the diagnosis, they’re often looking at the duration of those moods,” says Molly. In particular, they are looking to see if the low or high moods are sustained over a long period, and how impactful they are on a person’s ability to function. In the case of cyclothymia they also look at the person’s stability: one of the diagnostic criteria for cyclothymia is that you’re not stable for more than two months at a time. Shannon doesn’t yet have a formal diagnosis but she has begun monitoring her moods so that when she does refer herself for diagnosis, she can have solid proof of what she thinks is happening. However, she does feel a bit cautious about seeking treatment. “I recently had one of my most extreme periods of mood switch that made me realise I should probably speak to someone, but I keep putting up a mental block with going to the doctor. It’s quite unlike me; I go to the doctor about most physical things, and have been to counselling twice over emotional issues, but I don’t see what they will be able to do for me with this.” Shannon’s reticence is made harder to overcome not only because the pandemic will likely restrict face-to-face assessment but also because, as she says, “There is also a part of me that doesn’t want to seek diagnosis or treatment, because the manic feelings can be quite nice and fun!” Despite this, she has been monitoring her moods for three months and will continue to do so until she reaches the required one year minimum for NHS assessment. As much as she may enjoy the highs, she worries about the lows. “I don’t want to feel these rages over small things, and I worry about showing abusive behaviour towards my boyfriend when the switch happens.” If you are worried that you or someone you love may have cyclothymia, Molly says there is a range of things to watch out for, with lifestyle being particularly important. “For lots of people, lifestyle changes can be a big trigger for their changing mental health. So looking at how you can manage stress and how you can manage your sleeping pattern is important.” Different forms of stress will have a different impact too: stress over a family member’s wellbeing, or the impact of grief, will have a different impact from work stress. Some people have a genetic predisposition to mental health conditions related to illicit drug use, so those who take a lot of stimulants or smoke a lot of weed may be more likely to develop symptoms. I don’t want to feel these rages over small things, and I worry about showing abusive behaviour towards my boyfriend when the switch happens.Shannon, 23 Molly adds that having a child can also be quite impactful. “They don’t really know why, but some people can have their first episode of what they call postpartum psychosis or mood change in relation to the hormonal changes that happen after giving birth. So if you are trying for a baby, pregnant or have recently given birth it’s really important you share your experiences if you start noticing that you’re experiencing some mood changes, even if you think that you might be just hormonal (that’s quite a common thing that we speak to people about).” With a combination of medication, therapies and some form of extra support like self-management or psychoeducation, cyclothymia can be thoroughly managed although, as with everything, the current pandemic will have had an impact on access to those treatments. Molly is quick to warn against self-diagnosis or attempting to self-medicate in any way, even if you are waiting for a referral. “The reason why we don’t recommend self-diagnosis is because mental health is so complex. In the spectrum of disorders that appear to be bipolar disorder to the untrained eye, there can be other things going on: personality disorder, major depressive disorder, some anxiety and panic disorders can look a bit like bipolar disorder. There’s also some physical health conditions that can look like bipolar disorder so we encourage people to get clinical advice.” Instead she advises putting an appointment in the diary so that you have a deadline, monitoring your mood so you have something to point to when you see your GP, and looking at what self-management options you can consider. “Not taking extreme action but looking at ways you can self-manage safely: things like monitoring your moods, recognising your triggers, taking part in activities that help with relaxation and sleep, avoiding stress, all those kinds of things can be helpful ways to temporarily manage your mood while you’re waiting for clinical services to become available to you.” Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?I Was Told My PMDD Was BipolarMum & Me, On Being Black & BipolarShould You Worry About Your Mood Swings?
How can you comprehend the incomprehensible? I’ve spent much of this week wondering. I understand the horror of the daily death toll but I cannot feel it. I read the words “the United Kingdom is one of the coronavirus death capitals of the world” and nothing happens. Last year, I cried more than once during the daily briefing which used to punctuate my day. Not for myself but for everyone who had lost their life, for everyone who had lost someone they loved. I was actively grieving for others and for something more nebulous: the time lost to the pandemic, the plans rescheduled, the hopes forcibly realigned. I know that I am at once still angry (with our politicians, mainly) and in mourning (for everything) but I am not actively experiencing either emotion. Last Wednesday, 1,820 people died because of COVID-19. On Thursday it was 1,290. To put that in perspective, around 1,500 people died on the RMS Titanic, a disaster around which our collective psyche has calcified. In two days we saw almost double that. The most commonly flown plane by easyJet is the Airbus A320CEO. These seat between 180 and 186 people at a time. So, on Wednesday, the number of people who were recorded in the daily death toll was equivalent to 10 of those planes falling out of the sky at once. We had hoped that things would be better by now, even when experts warned us they would not be. It was too much to bear to think they might stay the same but unconscionable that they would get worse. Even if we knew, on some level, that it might happen, we tried not to entertain the possibility. How could we, when what we are living through barely fits inside our brains, let alone can be broken down, digested and converted into thoughts so that it can be understood. Until Thursday, according to analysis by Oxford University, the UK had the highest per-person daily death toll of any country in the world. Yes, that’s right – it was around twice that of the United States, a country which is roughly 40 times bigger. As the reality of the third national lockdown sinks in, I’m aware of how much smaller my world has become. I move between my desk, my hob, my fridge, my bathroom and my bed. I don’t even go out on the balcony right now because it’s too cold. Yet I’m constantly aware of how big everything that’s happening to our world is. I worry about friends and family. I worry about NHS staff. I worry about the economy. But I do not feel anxiety or anguish like I did during the first lockdown. The most commonly flown plane by easyJet is the Airbus A320CEO. These seat between 180 and 186 people at a time. So, on Wednesday, the number of people who were recorded in the daily death toll was equivalent to 10 of those planes falling out of the sky at once. Why? I am stupidly fortunate in so many ways but it’s not like I haven’t experienced this virus at close quarters. I’ve had it twice. And while I was not hospitalised, the second time was particularly bad. It took six weeks to properly recover from and, in the fifth week, I “turned green” and nearly fainted on a short walk. Some days all I can taste is metal. I have aches that make no sense. I know people who have been hospitalised and, in the last two weeks, I know three people who have lost loved ones. Yet I cannot locate my feelings; I can no longer be certain how any of this is affecting me, what I am able or afraid to feel. I go outside, it feels better. I notice my body rearrange itself. I open up but I still feel…a bit numb. Perhaps it’s not surprising. It’s not unusual for people who are grieving to experience emotional numbness. On some level right now, we are all grieving for someone or something. David Kessler, the world’s foremost expert on grief, called this very early on in March last year. He explained that, regardless of whether we had been personally affected by the pandemic yet, we were experiencing “collective grief” and “anticipatory grief”. He also noted how unusual it was. “I don’t think we’ve collectively lost our sense of general safety like this,” he said. “Individually or as smaller groups, people have felt this. But all together, this is new. We are grieving on a micro and a macro level.” That may all be true but should I be worried that I can’t feel? Or should I embrace it as part of the ongoing task of processing the pandemic? I’m hardly alone in finding this lockdown harder to navigate than the others. Last week Ipsos Mori released a survey of 2,000 adults, of which 43% said they were finding things harder right now, with just 10% saying they were finding it easier. When we haven’t got enough energy left to process what’s going on around us, we push it down to a subconscious level. Linda Blair Clinical psychologist and author of The Key To Calm, Linda Blair, says that feeling numb is actually self-protective. It’s a coping mechanism. “When we haven’t got enough energy left to process what’s going on around us, we push it down to a subconscious level,” she explains. “The body and mind’s first command is to stay alive. You have to remain alert to the dangers around you but you will push down the actual extent of that danger.” However, Linda notes that while this is very common “at the beginning of a disaster” or immediately in the aftermath of the death of a loved one, “none of us have known a disaster that’s gone on this long. So we keep cycling into numbness which is not normal.” None of this is to say that numbing out is necessarily bad. “You really have to respect yourself,” Linda explains. “Your instinct knows what you need and if you need to dial down your feelings in order to go about your daily activities right now, then that is what you should do. Yes, it will hit us later. But everyone’s grieving process will be different and it may be that we have to overcome the public health crisis before we can truly process what it means.” Almost a year into the pandemic and we hear very few cries from people who want things to “go back to normal”. We know now, beyond any doubt, that everything has changed and that the point at which it changed is now an entire trip around the sun behind us. Yale historian Frank Snowden studies epidemics. He is particularly interested in how they hold a mirror up to society, to the conditions in which they were able to spread. His most recent book, Epidemics and Society: From the Black Death to the Present, is the result of 40 years of research on the topic. He notes that “epidemic diseases reach into the deepest levels of the human psyche. They pose the ultimate questions about death, about mortality: What is life for? What is our relationship with God? If we have an all-powerful, omniscient, and benign force, how do we reconcile that force with these epidemics that sweep away children in extraordinary numbers?” These are huge questions, all of which are being asked daily as we try to grapple with what’s going on around us. So as we buffer collectively, perhaps it’s okay that everything that has happened during the last 12 months is taking a while to sink in, just as everything we must prepare for in the future feels impossible to get to grips with. Perhaps it’s okay that we need to conserve our energy to get through the day, rather than exerting it all in anger at the home secretary as she says we should have shut our borders at the start of the pandemic. Perhaps it’s okay to feel a little bit desensitised to it all if it means you can get through the day because, even with the hope brought by vaccines on the horizon, we are still very much in this. If you are struggling with your mental health, please reach out to your GP or contact Mind. Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?Why I'm Not Sure I Want To Leave LockdownThe Danger Of Instagram TherapistsThere Is No Shame In Feeling Lonely Right Now
How many hours have you whiled away checking your smartphone, simultaneously rewatching Gossip Girl, also distracted by the bestseller you vowed to start last week? We are a generation saturated with cultural ‘musts’, constantly consuming media, from podcasts to articles, TV shows to social media. But we’re making little headway or real connection to any of it. The term ‘infobesity’ was coined in 2013 to describe “the condition of continually consuming large amounts of information, when this has a negative effect on a person’s wellbeing and their ability to concentrate.” Sound familiar? A survey of Canadian media consumption by Microsoft in 2015 concluded that the average attention span had fallen to eight seconds, down from 12 seconds in the year 2000. We now have a shorter attention span than goldfish, the study found. Satya Nadella, the chief executive officer of Microsoft, said at the time: “The true scarce commodity of the near future will be human attention.” Since then, our worlds have only crowded further with other people’s narratives – our focus diluted by podcast listening, binge watching and social media scrolling. When rioters stormed the Capitol in Washington DC earlier this month, I, along with the vast majority of those I follow on social media, reposted my disgust. That’s not to say I wrote my own post about my own feelings; I reposted one with the same sentiment. Same thing, right? In this particular case – an attempted coup and a hideously blatant example of systemic racism – there was only one opinion worth having. But what about when the topic is something a little more nuanced? Reposting culture makes having opinions easy and efficient. It acts as a buffer between us and the vulnerable and timely position of exploring what it is we really feel. Yet aligning with and reposting other people’s opinions clouds our ability to form our own, more specific narrative. And as an increasingly worried society, it sometimes feels much easier to adopt other people’s rhetoric than risk the anxiety of being ‘cancelled’ for creating our own. Offline, self-help book sales have reached record levels as burned out millennials turn to psychologists and celebrities like Russell Brand, Ruby Wax and Fearne Cotton for advice on how to cope with life and all its uncertainty. We muddle our way through the likes of Speak Your Truth, Declutter Your Mind and Think Like a Monk and yet we’re not really thinking for ourselves at all. We are so caught up in consuming the narratives that other people are telling us to live by – from how to think to the ‘correct’ way to organise our knicker drawer – that we have forgotten how to form our own opinions. All because we lack the ability, or the motivation, to sit alone with our own thoughts. We’re scared of being bored. But what if a little bit of boredom is actually good for us? What if, in good measure, boredom allows us an opportunity to debrief and ponder – a way to avoid knee-jerk decisions based on a quick survey of everyone else’s opinions? Perhaps boredom, some thinking time, a chance to just ‘be’ – rather than constant white noise – is essential to our happiness and even to our productivity. In his book Indistractable: How to Control Your Attention and Choose Your Life, former Stanford University lecturer and behavioural design expert Nir Eyal says that all distraction is unlearnable if we take ownership of it. “It’s too simple to say tech is ruining your brain,” he says. “Clearly, it plays a role. But even if you stopped using tech altogether, distraction would not go away.” There is a huge emotional element to seeking out distraction. “Time management is pain management,” says Eyal. The brain, he says, has evolved to feel dissatisfied and the reason you seek distraction is to escape those uncomfortable feelings. Over time, picking up your phone or plugging in Audible to listen to someone else’s narrative in a bid to avoid boredom becomes habit. Eyal has developed a technique to teach people how to sit with this discomfort of being alone with your own thoughts. It is called ACT: acceptance and commitment therapy. Whether you want to regain focus or simply allow yourself some time to reflect, he claims that with ACT, you can rewire you brain to do so. The first step is to learn to notice the discomfort that leads to your distraction by keeping a ‘trigger diary’. You might repeatedly delay a particularly monotonous work commitment with mindless Twitter scrolling, for example. Recording your thought processes in a note on your laptop or scribbling them down on a piece of paper will help you recognise what’s happening and how often. The next step is the one that’ll make you go “ergh”. Your task now, is to sit with and to question the sensation. “Most people feel self-contempt or blame themselves for their distraction,” says Eyal. “Instead, you need to sit with the temptation and be curious about it.” The third step is to be mindful during those triggering times. When you next go to seek distraction, be it via Instagram, Netflix or the fridge, try the 10 minute rule. “I tell myself it’s fine, but not right now. I have to wait just 10 minutes,” explains Eyal. Psychologists call this “surfing the urge”. Think of your urge like a wave – it will rise in intensity, peak, then eventually crash and subside. Increasing the amount of effort that it takes to do an undesirable action can also help you overcome your impulsivity. Turn off push notifications, remove distracting apps from your homepage and be selective about the hundreds of group chats you have pinging on WhatsApp. Apps like SelfControl and BlockSite restrict access to websites and can encourage more phone-free time, too. Finally, Eyal suggests we make time for “traction”. This means deciding what you want to achieve in every area of your life – in your relationships, professionally and personally – and planning time for each one daily. “This is especially important when we lack structure,” he says. “We need to bring back that structure into our lives to give ourselves some routine.” So earmark time for your work responsibilities, another family Zoom, your next workout and that hour to ponder on what you really think. In an era when conspiracy theories and fake news are rife, it is more important than ever to become a critical thinker. Blocking out some time to sit with your own thoughts and consider what it is you really think is not only important, it’s crucial. And if you decide your knicker drawer is better left unorganised, good for you – that’s one less thing to do. Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?Easily Distracted? Here's How To FocusThe Worst Social Media App For Sleep Is TikTokWhy We Hate Social Media Updates
Lockdown sci-fi Songbird is the latest in an outbreak of Covid movies – Clarisse Loughrey asks if it's just too soon
This week, HuffPost UK reader Rita asked: "Are surgical masks better than cloth masks?"
The starter has been fed by bakers in the Cotswolds for generations – and has long outgrown its original jar.
Yahoo Style