A guide to the best (virtual, for now) sex parties in the UK

Jasmine Lee-Zogbessou
·5-min read

From Cosmopolitan

Venture inside the adventurous world of UK sex parties, a growing industry that aims to satisfy the kinkiest of us all, the fetish seekers and the sexually empowered. With COVID-19 putting a dampener on these hedonistic events, founders and attendees are having to get creative. Here is our guide to the lockdown-friendly sex parties and swingers clubs London and the UK has to offer right now.

Swinger clubs and sex parties London & UK

Killing Kittens

Launched in 2005 by Emma Sayle, Killing Kittens (KK) is an exclusive sex party designed for and fully focused on female pleasure. Tagged as “the network for the sexual elite”, KK vets all potential participants through an application process (just an image and brief bio). And the best news? Women have all the control because men are not allowed to approach first.

With over 100,000 online members consisting of both men and women across London, Manchester and Los Angeles, KK launched virtual house parties to satisfy its large following of pleasure-seekers throughout COVID-19. These parties include Zoom calls with erotic dance performances and couples and single kittens watching each other play out their sexual desires. And for those who are seeking a little guidance with their sex lives, KK has virtual workshops and masterclasses, with sessions discussing dirty talk and anal massages.

Torture Garden

As the world's largest monthly fetish club, London's Torture Garden (TG) is very well-known. Intended for those who are “seeking an experience far beyond the norm”, this sex party is not for the faint-hearted. Started back in 1990, by Alan Pelling and David Wood, as a response to the lack of “radical” and “edgy” alternative clubs, this extreme fantasy event is open to guests of all gender identities and sexual orientations.

With TG attracting up 2,500 people, attendees also experience theatrical performances and fashion shows, all while donning outfits that are only deemed acceptable if they would turn heads in the streets.

Due to COVID-19 however, all club events are currently on hold. But since September, TG has been running ‘The Pearl Necklace’, which offers a seated dining experience while in fetish wear. So, while the only things you can put in your mouth are the food and cocktails, at the very least you can look absolutely fabulous while doing it.

Skirt Club

Now, we can’t keep centring men’s pleasure in everything we see and do, which is exactly why Geneviève LeJeune founded member-only Skirt Club in 2014, which aims to be a safe space for all sexually curious women. Specifically aimed at bi-curious and bisexual women, Skirt Club’s purpose is for women to freely “express and exist as their true authentic selves, without judgement”.

Sexual discovery and empowerment are at the forefront of Skirt Club and they are currently hosting weekly online events for members to ask questions, share experiences and coach each other, offering solidarity, flirtation and social events, over raunchy hedonism.

Regardless, Club Etiquette must always be followed: no cameras or photography and strictly no men peeping at screens from across the room. Oh, and while there isn’t a strict dress code, members are described as “effortlessly stylish”. Make of that what you will.

Crossbreed

If you step foot into kink-positive rave, Crossbreed, one thing you must step out of is the realm social conformity. Founded by DJ and producer, Kiwi (real name Alex Warren), the event has three separate rooms for attendees: a dancefloor to get your moves on, a wellness sanctuary if you fancy an escape with a nice cup of tea and a fetish-furnished playroom for sexual exploration. Everyone is welcome, but only if you conform to the dress code, which includes fetwear, PVC, leather, later, bondage, nylon… (you get the picture).

Crossbreed has continued its parties this year but only socially-distanced, rule of six, set-table only, ‘appropriately’ dressed parties, without the heavy petting.

Klub Verboten

Open to member-only ravers, Klub Verboten was born in 2016 to provide a safe space for self-expression and alternative forms of human interaction. Providing community safety, that strays away from the often intimidating and non-consensual experience of everyday nightlife, is at the core of Verboten’s ethos.

In September, Verboten hosted a one-off experimental still life project with human protagonists, rubber bodies, voyeurs and exhibitionists. However, more recently, they’re sticking to free, weekly, digital socials to combat isolation woes.

Xtasia

Created in the 1980s, Xtasia is one of the UK’s longest-running sex parties. Based in West Bromwich and covering both sexy swingers and fetish fancies weekly, Xtasia hosts foam parties, female foursomes and Cirque du Soleil themed events.

They have currently gone virtual, offering online ‘Hotel Rooms’ to its members. Attendees can expect BDSM Fetish Friday, Lingerie & Lust weekends, Black and White parties and live interactive extravaganzas, all at the touch of a button.

The Private Club

Described as the UK’s best kept secret (I guess, not so much anymore), The Private Club is a Birmingham-based open to all. They host six weekly sex parties where you can expect glory holes and swinging couples, but new members must undergo a three-month probationary period, with a minimum of four visits to their parties.

Although currently closed due to COVID-19, The Private Club wants to switch their events up a little bit once they do eventually open, with fewer parties a week and ‘Special Themed’ events. So, keep your eyes peeled.

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