How to slim your wedding down to 30 guests without upsetting friends

Lucy Scott
Photo credit: LumiNola - Getty Images

From Red Online

The good news is that as the lockdown eases weddings can once again take place in England from the 4th July. The bad news? Only 30 guests can attend.

The average British wedding has between 80-120 guests which means if you go ahead with a planned wedding, you might have to face the awkward problem of uninviting some of your pals.

Firstly, how do you choose who attends? Secondly, how do you keep your relationship in tact with those who don’t make the short list?

Etiquette coach and director of The English Manner William Hanson says it might be best to simply postpone. 'Weddings can annoy and upset people at the best of times and Covid is only going to make things worse with the new guidance,' he tells HuffPost UK.

'If I had planned a bigger wedding, I would question how much I needed to get married this year versus whether I should hold off, rather than settling for a scaled-back affair.'

Photo credit: Unsplash

This advice won’t help those who have already postponed their wedding once, or don’t have wedding insurance to cover any fees. In this instance it's best to think about the people who you have seen in the last six months to help you make a start.

Jennifer Claire Constant, founder of The Celebrant Directory says: 'Close your eyes and imagine who’s a big part of your life and, if they weren’t there on your wedding day, would be a really upsetting thing for you. Think about people who make you feel happy and have always been there and supported you.'

Constant continues, 'Try to have the conversation in person or on a video call or phone call so you can highlight it’s nothing personal, but with government restrictions, you’re being put in a difficult situation. If they truly care, they will fully understand.'

It’s not all doom and gloom - a smaller wedding can be more relaxed and personal and give you the chance to actually interact with each of your guests. And don’t forget, you can still make those who can’t be there in person part of your celebration by live streaming your wedding – we’re all experts at Zoom these days.

We recently spoke to Sarah Allard, editor of wedding planning website Hitched.co.uk, about her wedding trend predictions for 2021. Read them here.

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