DJ Shamed for Her Outfit Fights Back: 'My Sexuality Has Nothing to Do With My Body'
London-based DJ and party promoter Ashley James recently posted about an experience in which she felt disrespected and sexualized by a cab driver.
James posted a selfie on her Instagram channel wearing the black bralette top she was in during an incident in which a cab driver took a photo of her chest. She described her thoughts on the experience, which took place before one of her gigs.
“Let’s talk about body confidence (and sorry for the long rant),” she began the post. “Tonight someone said to me that they really enjoy the fact that I’m open and accepting of my body. It was kind of ironic because tonight, on the way to DJ for the @bouxavenue lingerie event, my cabbie turned around and took a photo of my boobs.”
She also detailed how the cab driver made her feel through his rude action.
“I was already quite uncomfortable with my outfit… I succumbed to the slut shaming, broke down in tears, and then got changed at the event into something that didn’t feel me.”
But James didn’t want to let the cab driver’s offensive move dictate her decision — so she reversed it.
“Later, I realized I’d allowed some sexist arsehole dictate how I should feel about my NATURAL GOD-GIVEN body so I got changed again. The road to body acceptance and confidence is hard, which is why I thought I’d share this story with you, but I’m trying. Thanks to all the awesome men and women who pep-talked me back to confidence tonight.”
The post was met with over 3,000 likes and a number of supporters in comments.
“No one should be made to feel the way that cab driver made you feel!” one follower commented. “You look amazing in that dress, but in any event you’re so much more than your looks — you just ran a marathon for a start! Wear whatever the hell you like; and as Emma Watson said recently when she had a similar issue, feminism has nothing to do with your tits.”
Another reiterated the thought, writing, “Everyone should wear what they want — when they want! Society dictates way too much already. Do not allow your dress sense and/or style — which to a lot of people represents their individuality — be compromised.”
One user had a slightly different take — insinuating women should expect comments or reactions when they dress a certain way. “You’re beautiful. I just don’t get it when ladies flaunt their boobs but yet complain when people look or make comments. The cabbie was well out of order by the way!” the user wrote.
To this remark, James explained, “You’re missing the point. I don’t know what boob size you have, but most girls with big boobs will understand my frustration that ANY outfit — even a vest top — looks slutty. But I didn’t choose to have my boobs, and I shouldn’t have to wear unsexy outfits so that men (and women) think I’m not a slut. My sexuality has NOTHING to do with my body.”
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